Portable dental unit with air compressor

I did my 4 yrs of 2800 at the stumps from 78-82 and on a work assignment out in middle of nowhere (thats everywhere at the stumps) we were tasked with disassembly of what I think was a portable runway in the desert. It was NOT the old Marston Mats tho, it had similarities but the sections were rigid consisting of a corrugated steel bottom topped with 1/4 - 1/2 in plate aluminum. Disassembly consisted of breaking loose the connected sections by sledge hamnering out giant pins, as well as a metal grinder cutting loose flathead bolts at regular section intervals. It was fucking hell, ambient air temp 110-120f, and standing on a giant metal reflector lol. Does anyone know what this was called? or had experience with it?

6 spots open of 8
"Whoa 100$? That's insane!?" This is not your typical paid per session campaign, instead we are offering a full level 3-20 experience for an upfront deposit, that may be returned under the right circumstances.
"What do you mean by "deposit"?: 100$ is a lot of money to invest into a game up front, we understand this. We are not out to make a profit on this game, the deposit will be returned on the conclusion of the campaign. There will also be other circumstances where the money may be returned. Had a major life change and just can't make time anymore, such as a baby, divorce or big move? No problem, let's talk about that. Started strong but you just aren't clicking with the party? Okay, let's talk about that, maybe put it to a vote in the party. We don't want anyone to feel trapped in a game they aren't enjoying, but we only want to attract the players who will be fully committed to play the game all the way through, be prepared every session, and are just generally a good person to play with. If you are being a jerk and get kicked, deposit forfeited. If you are missing session, constantly distracted, or frequently coming unprepared, you're getting kicked and forfeit your deposit. We don't want to kick players, and will try to fix a problem or come to a solution first, we will listen to our players' concerns as well. Any forfeited money will be used towards the campaign.
"Okay that's fair, and I'm eager to play! When do you want my money?" Your money isn't held hostage, it's a sign of commitment. We won't expect a payment until after session 0, This will give everyone a fair chance to see what they're getting into, meet the people they'll be playing with, and decide this isn't for them. We will also be much more lenient to return money in the first month after seeing how the people you're playing with act.
Disclaimer: If you are racist, bigoted, or just generally a jerk, this isn't the game for you. We didn't make this to fulfill your sick fantasies, and if you're making our players uncomfortable it will be fixed immediately, or you will be kicked. Do not make us pause our game in the middle of the session to correct your behavior. If you made it to here tell us you're a major dice goblin in the other section of the google form. That being said, we are all adults and expect everyone to act like it. There will be cussing, adult content (drinking, smoking, violence), NSFW scenes will be fade to black though, we don't want to RP sexual acts with y'all, keep that in mind for flirting as well, to a lesser extent.
Alright, with that out of the way, lets dive in!
Logistics-
Games are every other week, Beginning in July
You do not need a ready-made character before Session 0, just a concept!
We will stream on twitch. Your backstory can be whatever you want with a couple of stipulations. You are an "other-worlder", you came to this planet through a portal for whatever reason you can come up with, maybe you're on the run, maybe you were sent here as a scout, maybe you were just curious, but your backstory should always end with you entering the portal from your home planet to be transported to Oob. Keep in mind, whatever you left in your old world, can also find its way to Oob... Your ideals should also be that of which you want to go on an adventure, and preferably line up chaotically for the Chromatic kingdom, or lawful for the Metallic kingdom.
The game will be ran with 2 Dungeon masters. That is to say, 2 separate campaigns in the same world run at the same time. We are looking for 8 players, 2 groups of 4. There will be sessions that involve all of us together, but most of the time it will be the typical makeup of 4 players and your DM. You will choose whether to play through either the Metallic campaign or the Chromatic campaign.
Choices you make matter! Not only could they change your campaign, they can change the other players campaign, and the world. There can and will be consequences and rewards, we are aiming for a living world that evolves all the time. If you made it here, Tell us you're not only a major dice goblin, but a major dice goblin who bakes brownies too.
About us:
u/gogone3 : Hi! I have 8 years of experience with DnD, I've been DMing for 6, and I love the game. I'm 28 years old and am in the military. I've never had the pleasure of playing a full campaign all the way through and that's my goal here. I'm pretty laid back and lenient, my players come first, whatever you want to try, whatever homebrew you have, let me know so I can help you do that thing! I will be running the Chromatic campaign.
u/AirForce_Demon_420 : With about 2 years of experience DM-ing and 3 years total Dnd experience, I offer a serious game and am open to all types of ideas that make sense within the world. I will not tolerate arguing after I have decided on a ruling, and things may change after the "heat of the moment" ruling. I also will treat everyone as an adult and don’t sugar coat things. All that being said, the games I run have been received very well, I offer voices, streaming, custom homebrew, and a strong balance between roleplay, exploration, and combat. I to tend a little more towards RP though. I am open to ideas that you may have and will do my best to reach a balance everyone can enjoy. I hope to see you at the table!
We offer a serious game for anyone interested, players will have access to all the DnDbeyond content. We ask you base your toon concept off of official books, and no UA doesn't count. We will be playing on foundry VTT and using discord for voice, If you want to use a camera even better but not a requirement. Please keep in mind this material may be streamed so have an Avatar portrait available and understand that your voice will show up on any of the streams.
About the Setting -
The planet of Oob, a world ruled by the 3 kingdoms of dragons, Metallic, Chromatic, and Gems. The 3 kingdoms are at constant strife with each other, each believing their way of living is right. The Metallics believe that the world should be united under them, their citizens pledging allegiance to the great Bahamut. The Chromatics on the other hand believe that everyone should live freely, pledging fealty to the dragons and offering tribute to live in their land. The Gems believe everyone should live freely, but they take a more neutral approach. They focus more on bringing peace to the 3 kingdoms and allow their citizens to live in their territories unhindered by the dragons. This has led to the land outside of the Gem cities to be very dangerous as the other-worlders live without oversight. The dragons differencing beliefs have led the world to be at a constant war. To make matters more tense, the world is scattered with portals acting as doors from other worlds, a much larger portal in the center of the world is said to connect all the worlds. Through these portals, otherworldly denizens constantly stream through, making up the population of the planet, you are one of these individuals. Whatever your reason for coming to Oob, you quickly find that there's no turning back, the portal you came through is only 1 way. You start to panic, realizing your trapped here. Soon after, a friendly crystalline humanoid approaches you. The person calms you down and takes you to a hidden abode, where a magic circle on the ground whisks you away to a beautiful city made of various gemstones. Buildings, structures, monuments, and even the roads are made of gemstones of all kinds including; Amethyst, sapphire, emerald, topaz, and crystal. You marvel at the architecture for only few moments before another humanoid, this one's skin seems to be a shade of shiny blue, comes to you and leads you to a barracks-like encampment where you are allowed to be at ease, your role in this world has not yet been decided. Tomorrow you will meet with a dragon to find out where you belong.
If you've made it this far, leave a comment or send us a message, we will then send you an application link with google forms. We are very excited in the world we've built and can't wait to play with you! Link to Startplaying https://startplaying.games/adventure/clhtvm7sd004d08md5be4gzol

6 seats open of 8
"Whoa 100$? That's insane!?" This is not your typical paid per session campaign, instead we are offering a full level 3-20 experience for an upfront deposit, that may be returned under the right circumstances.
"What do you mean by "deposit"?: 100$ is a lot of money to invest into a game up front, we understand this. We are not out to make a profit on this game, the deposit will be returned on the conclusion of the campaign. There will also be other circumstances where the money may be returned. Had a major life change and just can't make time anymore, such as a baby, divorce or big move? No problem, let's talk about that. Started strong but you just aren't clicking with the party? Okay, let's talk about that, maybe put it to a vote in the party. We don't want anyone to feel trapped in a game they aren't enjoying, but we only want to attract the players who will be fully committed to play the game all the way through, be prepared every session, and are just generally a good person to play with. If you are being a jerk and get kicked, deposit forfeited. If you are missing session, constantly distracted, or frequently coming unprepared, you're getting kicked and forfeit your deposit. We don't want to kick players, and will try to fix a problem or come to a solution first, we will listen to our players' concerns as well. Any forfeited money will be used towards the campaign.
"Okay that's fair, and I'm eager to play! When do you want my money?" Your money isn't held hostage, it's a sign of commitment. We won't expect a payment until after session 0, This will give everyone a fair chance to see what they're getting into, meet the people they'll be playing with, and decide this isn't for them. We will also be much more lenient to return money in the first month after seeing how the people you're playing with act.
Disclaimer: If you are racist, bigoted, or just generally a jerk, this isn't the game for you. We didn't make this to fulfill your sick fantasies, and if you're making our players uncomfortable it will be fixed immediately, or you will be kicked. Do not make us pause our game in the middle of the session to correct your behavior. If you made it to here tell us you're a major dice goblin in the other section of the google form. That being said, we are all adults and expect everyone to act like it. There will be cussing, adult content (drinking, smoking, violence), NSFW scenes will be fade to black though, we don't want to RP sexual acts with y'all, keep that in mind for flirting as well, to a lesser extent.
Alright, with that out of the way, lets dive in!
Logistics-
Games are every other week, Beginning in July
You do not need a ready-made character before Session 0, just a concept!
We will stream on twitch. Your backstory can be whatever you want with a couple of stipulations. You are an "other-worlder", you came to this planet through a portal for whatever reason you can come up with, maybe you're on the run, maybe you were sent here as a scout, maybe you were just curious, but your backstory should always end with you entering the portal from your home planet to be transported to Oob. Keep in mind, whatever you left in your old world, can also find its way to Oob... Your ideals should also be that of which you want to go on an adventure, and preferably line up chaotically for the Chromatic kingdom, or lawful for the Metallic kingdom.
The game will be ran with 2 Dungeon masters. That is to say, 2 separate campaigns in the same world run at the same time. We are looking for 8 players, 2 groups of 4. There will be sessions that involve all of us together, but most of the time it will be the typical makeup of 4 players and your DM. You will choose whether to play through either the Metallic campaign or the Chromatic campaign.
Choices you make matter! Not only could they change your campaign, they can change the other players campaign, and the world. There can and will be consequences and rewards, we are aiming for a living world that evolves all the time. If you made it here, Tell us you're not only a major dice goblin, but a major dice goblin who bakes brownies too.
About us:
u/gogone3 : Hi! I have 8 years of experience with DnD, I've been DMing for 6, and I love the game. I'm 28 years old and am in the military. I've never had the pleasure of playing a full campaign all the way through and that's my goal here. I'm pretty laid back and lenient, my players come first, whatever you want to try, whatever homebrew you have, let me know so I can help you do that thing! I will be running the Chromatic campaign.
u/AirForce_Demon_420 : With about 2 years of experience DM-ing and 3 years total Dnd experience, I offer a serious game and am open to all types of ideas that make sense within the world. I will not tolerate arguing after I have decided on a ruling, and things may change after the "heat of the moment" ruling. I also will treat everyone as an adult and don’t sugar coat things. All that being said, the games I run have been received very well, I offer voices, streaming, custom homebrew, and a strong balance between roleplay, exploration, and combat. I to tend a little more towards RP though. I am open to ideas that you may have and will do my best to reach a balance everyone can enjoy. I hope to see you at the table!
We offer a serious game for anyone interested, players will have access to all the DnDbeyond content. We ask you base your toon concept off of official books, and no UA doesn't count. We will be playing on foundry VTT and using discord for voice, If you want to use a camera even better but not a requirement. Please keep in mind this material may be streamed so have an Avatar portrait available and understand that your voice will show up on any of the streams.
About the Setting -
The planet of Oob, a world ruled by the 3 kingdoms of dragons, Metallic, Chromatic, and Gems. The 3 kingdoms are at constant strife with each other, each believing their way of living is right. The Metallics believe that the world should be united under them, their citizens pledging allegiance to the great Bahamut. The Chromatics on the other hand believe that everyone should live freely, pledging fealty to the dragons and offering tribute to live in their land. The Gems believe everyone should live freely, but they take a more neutral approach. They focus more on bringing peace to the 3 kingdoms and allow their citizens to live in their territories unhindered by the dragons. This has led to the land outside of the Gem cities to be very dangerous as the other-worlders live without oversight. The dragons differencing beliefs have led the world to be at a constant war. To make matters more tense, the world is scattered with portals acting as doors from other worlds, a much larger portal in the center of the world is said to connect all the worlds. Through these portals, otherworldly denizens constantly stream through, making up the population of the planet, you are one of these individuals. Whatever your reason for coming to Oob, you quickly find that there's no turning back, the portal you came through is only 1 way. You start to panic, realizing your trapped here. Soon after, a friendly crystalline humanoid approaches you. The person calms you down and takes you to a hidden abode, where a magic circle on the ground whisks you away to a beautiful city made of various gemstones. Buildings, structures, monuments, and even the roads are made of gemstones of all kinds including; Amethyst, sapphire, emerald, topaz, and crystal. You marvel at the architecture for only few moments before another humanoid, this one's skin seems to be a shade of shiny blue, comes to you and leads you to a barracks-like encampment where you are allowed to be at ease, your role in this world has not yet been decided. Tomorrow you will meet with a dragon to find out where you belong.
If you've made it this far, leave a comment or send us a message, we will then send you an application link with google forms. We are very excited in the world we've built and can't wait to play with you! Link to Startplaying https://startplaying.games/adventure/clhtvm7sd004d08md5be4gzol

Arsenal 22/23 A Season Review Part 1 Of 3: August-World Cup: A Stunning Start.
The 2022/23 season is Mikel Arteta’s 3rd full campaign in charge of Arsenal and as well the 3rd of his managerial career. His 1st game in the hot seat came on Boxing Day of 2019, a 1-1 draw at Bournemouth which saw Arsenal drop down a place to 12th in the table. Just a few months into his reign and Arteta was the first high-profile figure in English Football to be diagnosed with Covid-19, the virus which drew the Premier League to a standstill for 3 months and the wider world for a much longer time. It was to empty stadiums which Arsenal played out the remainder of their season which eventually concluded on the 1st of August. An 8th-placed finish was the club’s lowest since 1995. However, there was joy to be found as there so often has been for Arsenal, in the FA Cup. In the one and only Covid FA Cup Final played in front of no spectators Arsenal came from behind to defeat London rivals Chelsea for their record-extending 14th FA Cup, after reaching the final with an unlikely triumph over Manchester City in the semis. Arteta’s first half-season had ended brilliantly and his first full-season started in the same vein with more silverware following as Arsenal defeated Premier League Champions Liverpool to win the Community Shield. Tough times quickly followed and Arteta may have been somewhat grateful for the empty stadiums, as it’s questionable whether the board would have held their nerve and kept faith with such a young manager through this dreadful period had the fans been inside the ground and able to voice their frustrations. On Boxing Day of 2020, not only did Mikel celebrate the 1 year anniversary of his first match in charge, he celebrated a 3-1 victory over Chelsea, his side's first league win for nearly 2 months. It was the first time Saka, Martinelli & Smith Rowe all started a league game together for Arsenal. It was to prove a seminal moment, but it wasn’t enough to move his team up from 15th in the table. It was never so bad again for Arteta and his Arsenal team, with the side eventually settling for a repeat of the previous season’s finish, again coming in 8th. Failure to win the Europa League (exiting the competition to Villarreal in the Semi-Finals, who were incidentally managed by Unai Emery, the manager sacked prior to Arteta taking the job) meant that Arsenal would be without European football for the first time since the 95-96 campaign. And the 21-22 season would begin horribly with Arsenal bottom after 3 matches in which they failed to score and conceded 9 goals. However as the season progressed Arsenal began to find some resilience, quality and self-belief. The sides upheaval came not coincidentally around the time club captain Aubameyang was stripped of that duty before being allowed to depart for Barcelona in the January window. Aubameyang had been the team’s standout performer when winning the FA Cup, but since those performances had seen him rewarded with a new bumper contract which made him by far the club’s best-paid player, his attitude and performance level had become a problem that needed to be dealt with.
More so than any win, it was actually a home defeat to Champions City which perhaps best demonstrated this new Arsenal which was beginning to emerge. They took City on and pushed them all the way only to eventually lose in the 93rd minute, whilst being a man down for the final half-hour with centre-back Gabriel being harshly dismissed. The fight was on with local rivals Tottenham for the final Champions League spot and it was firmly in Arsenal’s hands until a run of 4 defeats in 5 allowed Spurs back into contention. The Gunners appeared to retake control with a run of 4 straight wins before losing tamely away at Spurs and then Newcastle, in the end missing out by 2 points. Throughout the season Arsenal had spells of real high-quality football, and the fans had taken to the project with more passion and belief than they had in the final years of Wenger’s reign or during Unai Emery’s short-lived stint. In the end, though they missed out on the prize of Champions League football due to a combination of injuries to important players and the inexperience of a young group.
Despite the significant setback of missing out on a Champions League spot having held it in their hands for many of the season’s final months, Arsenal still entered the summer of 2022 with plenty of reasons for optimism. Bukayo Saka and Emile Smith Rowe had emerged as the real breakout stars of the prior season and Gabriel Martinelli wasn’t too far behind. There had been some clearly smart signings made by the club, in particular, those of Martin Ødegaard and Ben White, signed from Real Madrid and Brighton & Hove Albion respectively. The July purchases of Gabriel Jesus and Oleksandr Zinchenko for a combined 75M from Manchester City seemed yet more smart business, in them, they had picked up two quality players with four Premier League winners medals each, and both arriving aged 25 they seemed in the perfect age bracket to become big players for Arsenal not just for the immediate but as well the foreseeable future.
Jesus’ Arsenal debut came in a 5-3 friendly win over FC Nurnberg in which he scored twice. He followed this up with another in a 2-0 win over Everton as Arsenal continued their pre-season with a tour of the USA. Arsenal played 3 matches in America and won all 3, by far the most impressive being a 4-0 trouncing of Chelsea. The Gunners made it 5 pre-season wins from 5 when they returned home the following weekend to beat Sevilla 6-0 at the Emirates, a hattrick from Jesus meaning he had netted 7 goals in his first 5 appearances in Arsenal colours. Arsenal would get the Premier League season underway away at Crystal Palace, under the Friday night lights of Selhurst Park. No Premier League side would have envied them this difficult fixture, Arsenal had experienced just how tough it was 4 months prior when a 3-0 loss away at the ground began a torrid run of results for the Gunners. Arsenal had also begun the previous season away on a Friday night and come unstuck against newly promoted Brentford. Again Arsenal was straight back under the Premier League spotlight to see whether they had grown and matured from such damaging defeats last season. The Arsenal quickly proved they were up to the test, starting right on the front foot and keeping Palace penned back in their own third. Jesus immediately highlighted the new dimension he was going to bring to Arsenal’s attack, when his strength and then neat dribbling fashioned a great chance out of nothing, a chance Martinelli should have done much better with, his side-foot finish going the wrong side of the post with the goal gaping. The Brazilian would make up for it in the 20th minute when a corner was headed into the six-yard box by Zinchenko, who was picked out by Saka to deliver a free header. His head found Martinelli’s and from close range, he was able to notch Arsenal’s first of the league campaign. That was to be the only goal in the game for the next hour, but despite Arsenal’s slender lead they rarely looked in danger of being pegged back. On the instances that keeper Aaron Ramsdale was called into action, he was ready and dealt with Palace’s occasional threats soundly. The game was put beyond Crystal Palace in the 85th minute when Bukayo Saka’s dangerous ball across the six-yard box was headed into his own net by Guehi. This made certain of 3 richly deserved points for the Gunners.
Jamie Carragher for one was particularly impressed with the start Arsenal made to the game saying afterwards: “Arsenal played like a big team. When I say a big team, I’m talking about a Man City or Liverpool, a team who wherever they go, dominate the opposition. I felt like we were watching City or Liverpool in that first 20 minutes, half an hour.” Fellow Sky Sports pundit Gary Neville was more impressed with Arsenal in the second half saying: “The question mark about Arsenal will be whether they’ve got that robustness and resilience, physicality to get through that difficult 15 or 20 minute periods in away matches, and they got through that (tonight) and that impressed me.” Saliba was also singled out for praise with Carragher adding: “He looked the real deal. He adds something, we’ve always felt they were weak, at Brentford last season they got bullied and here last season, his physical stature will certainly help them in tough away games.”
Arsenal’s first home league game of the season was against Leicester City. The opening goal began with Jesus tormenting Johnny Evans tight to the touchline, after beating him he fed Martinelli who was able to get into the penalty area and find Xhaka, the Swiss international touched it first time back into Jesus who took a touch to steady himself then teased it over the head of Ward in the Leicester goal and into the net. It was an angle he had no right to try from, let alone score from but such was the Brazilian forwards confidence in front of the goal he fancied his chances from anywhere. The goal was nominated for Premier League goal of the month. Jesus got his second to double Arsenal’s advantage in the 35th minute, this time in a much simpler fashion. A corner across the six-yard box was not dealt with, a Leicester head on it only sped up its path to Jesus who was waiting to nod home from practically on the goal line.
Later in the first half, Leicester thought they had a way back into the game when referee Darren England pointed to the spot having judged Ramsdale to have brought down Jamie Vardy. However VAR advised him to check the monitor, and after re-watching the incident it was clear there was no contact made and the penalty decision was reversed. Leicester did still manage to half their deficit early in the second half though, a long ball was flicked on leaving Saliba in a difficult situation to deal with. Ramsdale was advancing but wouldn’t get there first and Vardy was waiting on the French defender’s shoulder, leaving him no alternative but to try and head the ball clear whilst facing his own goal. He only succeeded in diverting it into the net. This could have been a moment when the Arsenal crowd got nervous and frustrated. They had allowed a soft goal and their youngest defender was at fault. However the crowd immediately rallied behind Saliba and his teammates, he and the team needed help putting that mistake behind them and the crowd’s noise in the aftermath of conceding will have been reassuring to the players.
Demonstrating this, Arsenal went straight up the other end and scored, Ward made a meal of a cross, dropping it at the feet of Jesus who squared for Xhaka. The Swiss midfielder was being deployed in a new, more adventurous role where he was spending more time in the opposition box, he got his reward for this new tactic with a simple tap-in from right in front of the goal. Leicester would again reduce the home team’s lead to one however when Iheanacho found Maddison, who was able to shoot straight through Ramsdale. The young English keeper will have been disappointed at being so easily beaten from such an angle, his wide-open legs presenting the opportunity to the Leicester midfielder. Again Arsenal immediately responded to the setback by going up the other end and scoring again. This move began with Martinelli winning the ball back and feeding Ødegaard who moved the ball on to Jesus, who carried it forward before finding Martinelli who shot low from outside the box, he beat the outstretched Ward and hit the bottom corner, with the ball hitting the inside of the post on its way in. It had been a good day at the office for Arsenal and a great day for Gabriel Jesus, though despite scoring 2 and assisting the other 2 of Arsenal’s 4 goals, according to his manager Jesus left the field disappointed because: “he thinks he should have scored 4, that’s the sort of mentality you need. I wouldn’t like to play against him. He’s so mobile, intuitive, sharp and proactive in any moment or phase of the game.”
Arsenal next travelled to newly promoted Bournemouth. It took The Gunners just 5 minutes to take the lead and again it came from the phenomenal centre-forward play of Gabriel Jesus. A loose touch from White saw the ball launch high into the air, the Brazilian reacted first, beautifully controlling the ball whilst at the same time using his considerable body strength to hold off the Bournemouth midfielder, with exceptional balance he then dribbled around two other Bournemouth shirts until he was on the edge of the box facing their defence, with a lovely disguised pass he then fed Martinelli who was free to his left, his shot was saved but it fell straight at the feet of new captain Martin Ødegaard who was on hand to notch his first of the season. Rightfully though the praise went to Jesus with commentator Alan Smith saying: “You won’t see a better example of centre forward play than this.”
Ødegaard had to wait just 6 more minutes for his second of the season, a cross along the floor from White found Jesus who was free, his first touch wasn’t the best but it allowed it to set up nicely for the Norwegian to strike first time, which he duly did and the ball flashed into the net. Early in the second half and Arsenal had a third goal, with Xhaka setting it back to Saliba just inside the penalty area. Saliba struck it beautifully the first time, keeping his shot down under the bar and too perfectly placed for the keeper to do anything about. It was just Saliba’s second goal in senior football but he had finished it with the class and composure of a player who had scored 200. The strike drew Zinchenko to his knees, clutching his head in disbelief at the quality of the finish and unsurprisingly it was voted as Arsenal’s goal of the month. Jesus thought he’d netted Arsenal’s 4th but a VAR check ruled the goal out for offside, so the North Londoners had to settle for a 3-0 win in what had been an excellent away performance.
The Arsenal faced more newly promoted opposition the following week, this time back at home against Fulham for Arteta’s 100th Premier League game in charge. They would be without Zinchenko and Partey who had picked up injuries and were replaced by Tierney and Elneny respectively. The best chance of the first half went to Saka who got beyond his marker to face Leno one-against one, but he was unable to beat the keeper. It would be Fulham who took the lead however with Arsenal falling behind for the first time in the season. From the full-back position, Saka flighted a ball into Gabriel, who unnecessarily played himself into trouble. He never seemed to have the ball truly under his spell, and his second touch invited Mitrovic to try and take it off him, the defender then got his body positioning wrong, and failed to protect the ball allowing the forward to nick it from behind him and then the Serb was able to keep his composure and finish past Ramsdale.
Fulham’s lead lasted just 8 minutes, Martin Ødegaard lodging Arsenal’s response. There was a degree of good fortune about the goal, with a big deflection on the strike. But there was no doubt the Norwegian had deserved it, he was having an outstanding game with all of Arsenal’s danger coming through him. He was constantly creating, with inventive passes and dribbling runs. In this instance, a clever stepover had bought him the space for the shot. Ødegaard continued to lead Arsenal’s push for a winner with he, in particular, deserving to be on the winning side, and the winner did come though not until the 86th minute. Leno failed to deal with a corner, missing his attempted punch clearance and the ball fell at the feet of Gabriel who was able to gain the perfect redemption for his earlier error by securing all 3 points for his side. The goal kept Arsenal at the top of the Premier League as they remained the only team with a 100% record.
Arsenal finished August with another home game, facing Steven Gerrard’s Aston Villa. This presented Arsenal with a chance to win their opening 5 league games for the first time since 2004. Saka passed up a golden opportunity to give Arsenal the ideal start when Martinelli’s cross found him completely free at the back post, it was set up perfectly for Saka to hit on the volley, which he did but he got too under the ball and lifted it horribly high and wide from inside the six-yard box. An Arsenal opening goal felt inevitable however and it came on the half-hour mark when Emi Martinez could only push out an Xhaka shot as far as Gabriel Jesus, who was on hand to punish him. Martinez did go someway to redeeming himself later in the half with an excellent stop to deny a brilliant half-volley from Martinelli from 25 yards out.
Arsenal dominated the first half and continued their domination in the second but could not increase their advantage, it was instead Aston Villa who got the second goal of the game, in a somewhat controversial fashion. A corner from Douglas Luiz went straight into the net with Ramsdale unable to reach the ball due to his path being completely blocked by Kamara, who also limited the keepers’ movement by having both arms wrapped around his back. The goal stood but Arsenal cancelled it out in their own way, by going straight up the Villa end and retaking the lead. Saka coolly picked out Martinelli who struck it the first time on the half volley, Martinez clawed desperately at the ball but could not prevent it from going over his goal line and The Gunners were able to see the victory out. Arsenal’s player of the month was unsurprisingly Gabriel Jesus with 3 goals and 3 assists in 5 games. Arsenal’s maximum points after 5 games saw Mikel Arteta pick up Premier League manager of the month.
Arsenal started September with a chance to go 4 points clear of City in 2nd, after just six games. Standing in their way was Manchester United who would be hosting the Gunners at Old Trafford, a ground Arsenal had only won at once in the league since 2006, that one as well being without fans during the Covid season. Arsenal was boosted by the return of Zinchenko but had to start with their 3rd choice midfielder Sambi Lokonga for the Partey role after Elneny had followed the Ghanaian onto the treatment table. Regardless of the blow, Arsenal appeared to have made the ideal start when Saka threaded the needle and put Martinelli clean through on goal. The Brazilian finished brilliantly to give Arsenal the lead, but VAR advised the referee to have a look at a potential foul in the build-up. On review, the referee judged Ødegaard to have won the ball from Eriksen unfairly and chalked the goal off. The intervention made by Lee Mason on VAR was later judged by a Premier League review to be an incorrect one, the minimal contact not penalised in real-time by the ref was judged not to be a clear or obvious error. The review came too little and too late as far as Arsenal were concerned as they’d lost their lead and instead found themselves trailing at half-time after a good move from United culminated in a debut goal for Antony who finished past Ramsdale.
VAR’s intervention in the Arsenal goal was always likely to prove a vital one as remarkably United had not lost at Old Trafford when leading at half-time since 1984. This showed the size of Arsenal’s task going into the second half, but they continued to probe and ask questions of United and they got their equaliser on the hour mark when the ball broke to Saka in the penalty area after Ødegaard had looked to thread one through to Jesus. United dealt with that immediate threat but could only clear as far as Saka who slotted through the legs of Martinez for his first of the season. Arsenal looked to be in the ascendancy, but they were only level for 6 minutes. Overcommitting bodies forward left them without a midfield and after winning it back United was able to counter-attack with Bruno Fernandes who looked and found Rashford in behind the defence and he put United back in front. Arteta reacted immediately by looking to chase the game, giving a debut to summer recruit Fabio Vieira. The changes appeared to backfire however as Arsenal were left with even fewer defensive bodies on the field and in the 75th minute they were cut through once more, with Eriksen and Rashford both left in acres of space as United hit Arsenal once more on the counter-attack. It was a horrible goal for Arsenal to concede, it reminded of the worst years of Wenger with everyone so committed to attacking they had no thought for defending. Arsenal suffered their first defeat of the season going down 3-1.
There were some positives to take in how confidently and capably they had passed the ball around, however, United had defended their penalty area very well and counter-attacked effectively. The frustration for Arsenal was how they had helped them in that regard, by leaving key areas of the midfield devoid of players. Partey had been very badly missed, and to a lesser extent so had Elneny whose defensive intelligence would not have seen him vacate his position as often as Lokonga did. The third goal conceded was perhaps the responsibility of Arteta who had gone all out attack mode too early, given the counter-attacking success United were already enjoying.
Arsenal got the chance to put the defeat behind them 4 days later when they began their Europa League campaign. They were placed in Group A alongside PSV Eindhoven, Bodo/Glimt and FC Zurich, and would kick off against the latter away in Switzerland. Summer signings Matt Turner and Marquinhos made their competitive debuts, and Vieira would make his full debut. Arsenal did some counterattacking of their own in the 16th minute when Vieira found Nketiah who travelled down the wing before playing a great ball across the box which found Marquinhos who expertly finished the first time into the top corner. The hosts equalised on the verge of half-time however when Nketiah was judged to have committed an offence in his own penalty box. The death of the Queen being announced during the first half led to the unusual circumstance of a minute’s silence taking place before the second half. When it did kick off, Arsenal regained the lead in the 62nd minute through Nketiah who was found with a delightful ball by Marquinhos who had made a fine debut. That’s how the score remained. Arsenal would not be in Premier League action that weekend, with their home game against Everton being postponed due to the Queen’s passing. Also delayed was their home game against PSV the following week, so the team were not back in action until 10 days after the Zurich game when they travelled to Brentford.
Arsenal dominated the games opening and took a deserved lead in the 17th minute when Saliba’s header from a corner struck the inside of the post on its way over the line. Just shy of the half-hour mark and Arsenal had their second, again with a header, this time it was Gabriel Jesus who rose to meet Xhaka’s perfectly placed ball. The Gunners then got the ideal start to the second half, when Vieira, making his first start in the Premier League in place of the unavailable Ødegaard, struck a beauty out of nowhere from well outside the box for Arsenal’s September goal of the month. Arsenal was in cruise control, always looking like the more likely team to score whilst barely giving Brentford sight of their goal. In the final minutes, Ethan Nwaneri came on for his Arsenal debut, aged 15 years and 181 days he became the youngest player to ever appear in the Premier League. After the match, Brentford Manager Thomas Frank was one of the first to tip Arsenal for a title challenge saying: “I think they will do brilliantly. I think they compete for the title now.” Xhaka was the resounding winner of Arsenal player of the month picking up 83% of the votes. A once deeply unpopular player, his turnaround best exemplified the strides in the right direction Arsenal were taking.
After the international break, Arsenal returned to action in the North London Derby against hated rivals Tottenham. Arsenal went into the fixture just one point above their opponents. Spurs were content to let Arsenal have possession whilst aiming to contain them and spring counterattacks. They kept Arsenal at bay until the 20th minute when Thomas Partey shot from over 20 yards out and hit it so perfectly that Lloris couldn’t get so much as a fingertip to it, the ball flew past him into the net for Arsenal’s goal of the month. Spurs responded in the 31st minute however after a good counterattack between the front three of Kane, Son and Richarlison saw the latter presented with a chance to cross from inside the penalty area and Arsenal did not effectively deal with the situation, a loose touch from Xhaka put his side back in trouble and Gabriel was panicked into conceding a penalty. Kane stepped up and of course, scored for the 7th time from the spot against Arsenal. This sent the sides in at the break-level pegging.
Arsenal regained the upper hand early in the second half after a shot by Saka was spilt by Lloris to his centre-half Romero who, under pressure from Jesus, looked to return it to the French keeper. Lloris missed the ball, it travelled under his body and then Jesus reacted first to poach it home. Spurs hopes of drawing level for a second time were damaged when Emerson Royal was shown a straight red card in the 62nd minute for a stupid and unnecessarily bad tackle on Martinelli. Arsenal quickly punished this ill discipline getting their third 5 minutes afterwards, with Granit Xhaka rifling past Lloris. At this stage Conte retreated to avoid a hammering, he accepted defeat and took off his offensive players, bringing on defenders to ensure the score line didn’t get embarrassing and Arsenal saw out a comfortable 3-1 derby win. Arsenal next returned to Europa League action putting Bodo/Glimt to the sword with a 3-0 win, goals coming from Nketiah, Holding and Vieira, the latter after brilliant footwork in the box from substitute Jesus.
Next up for Arsenal was another tough test at home against Liverpool. With a win, Arsenal would return to the top of the Premier League. Arsenal had faced Liverpool 4 times the previous season, failing to win any, losing 3 times including twice at home. They had also failed to even score against Liverpool in their last 6 meetings with them, but they needed just 58 seconds on this day, with Saka finding Ødegaard, whose ball between Van Dijk and Alexander Arnold put in Martinelli who finished beyond Alisson. Liverpool recovered well from the nightmare start however and was the better team from that point until they got their deserved equaliser in the 34th minute through Darwin Nunez. It was Arsenal however who went into half-time with the lead when Martinelli led a brilliant counter-attack from a Liverpool set piece, finally taking out both Arnold and Henderson by cutting inside and finding an unmarked Saka who slid in to put his team back in the ascendancy.
Again Liverpool responded well, equalising for a second time early in the second half through Roberto Firmino. From that point on though Arsenal found another level, they searched feverishly for a winning goal, looking to pass Liverpool to death and calving many openings. The noise inside the Emirates had reached deafening decibels as the fans urged their team on. The golden chance came with just under 15 minutes to go when Thiago was judged to have caught the back of Jesus’s foot inside the penalty area, having been beaten to the ball by the striker. Saka stepped up and held his nerve, confidently dispatching an excellent spot kick. Arsenal held out for what was in the end a deserved win after an excellent second-half display. In a decision that had raised a few eyebrows, Tomiyasu had been drafted in for a first league start of the season to go into an unfamiliar left-back position, the move paid dividends as the Japanese international had a fine game up against Mo Salah. The result put Arsenal 14 clear of Liverpool who had endured a dreadful start to the season.
“These are broad shoulders, this is courage. A sporting moment in time. Bukayo Saka.. Such poise! such noise!” – Peter Drury as Saka beats Alisson Becker from the penalty spot.
Four days later Arsenal made it 3 wins from 3 in the Europa, with an away win in Norway on the artificial pitch of Bodo/Glimt. A sole goal from Bukayo Saka was enough after he got on the end of a one-two with Lokonga. His initial shot was blocked by a defender but the ball then deflected in after coming back off the Arsenal winger. Bodo calved out many good chances for themselves but was let down by woeful finishing, squandering chance after chance by blazing high and wide of the target. Arsenal then returned to Premier League action at Elland Road against Leeds, though 40 minutes behind schedule after a power outage just after the game had initially kicked off caused the game to need restarting once power had returned.
Again Saka was the only man to get himself on the scoresheet, his goal coming after Jesus had passed up a golden chance to open the scoring failing to hit the net from close range after Ødegaard had found him with a backheeled flick. Jesus attempted to lift the ball over the keeper, but he lifted it too high and it ended up over the crossbar. Arsenal did not let Leeds off a second time however and punished them after a sloppy cross-field pass from Leeds midfielder Rodrigo only found Saka who headed it into Ødegaard’s path. Ødegaard’s return pass then asked a lot of the winger, but his speed allowed him to reach the ball first. Saka was faced with a tight angle, but it didn’t phase him one bit and he picked out the top corner hitting it high into the roof of the Leeds net.
The second half was full of drama, first when Bamford thought he’d equalised but was instead penalised for a foul on Gabriel. The Leeds striker received a second chance though when Saliba was found guilty of a handball in the box after the referee had checked the monitor. Ramsdale guessed correctly in his dive, but in the end, he wasn’t required as Bamford’s penalty went wide of the post. Arsenal continued to suffer in the second half, struggling to cope with the Leeds onslaught and maintain their slender advantage. Through fatigue and pressure from the home side, Arsenal had lost all ability to pass the ball and could do little else but stay in their own half and try to defend. Ramsdale proved his worth to this Arsenal side with his best performance of the season to date, right when his team needed him most. It appeared as though Arsenal had got the job done when crazily they conceded a second penalty of the half in additional time. Patrick Bamford was nowhere near the ball which was safely back with Ramsdale when Gabriel was penalised for a kick out in the box on the Leeds forward. As well as a penalty, the Brazilian centre-back was also dismissed. However on a VAR review, it was clear that Bamford had fouled Gabriel first, barging him to the floor, so rightfully the decision was reversed and Gabriel’s red card was rescinded. Arsenal held on to a win they’d scarcely deserved and it proved an even bigger win later that day when City lost at Anfield meaning The Gunners stayed 4 points clear after 10 games.
The following Thursday Arsenal were back in action in the Europa League. They were originally scheduled to host Manchester City in the league that mid-week, but the Queens’ death led to the postponement of Arsenal’s fixture with PSV, and it was re-arranged to this game week. Arsenal battered their Dutch visitors, in the end mustering 25 shots to Eindhoven’s 4. As was often the case Saka and Jesus were the standout performers. The young English winger was unstoppable in his direct dribbling runs, unstoppable that is without resorting to fouling, which PSV defenders did time and time again after being skinned by Saka’s great ball control when running at speed. Jesus was similarly dangerous, doing his usual thing of fashioning chances out of nowhere with his quick thinking and somehow even quicker feet. In the end, though the deadlock was broken by Xhaka in the 70th minute when Tomiyasu found him in space 15 yards from the goal. He hit the shot down into the ground and it bobbled just at the right time to go under the keeper and past him.
Next Arsenal travelled to struggling Southampton looking to make it 9 straight wins across the Premier League and Europa. They started fast, and when Xhaka finished off White’s cross with a brilliant volley into the back of the net in the 11th minute, it looked like it would be a case of how many, as it wasn’t the first good chance Arsenal had created. For the first 20 minutes, Southampton couldn’t get out of their own half, Ødegaard cleverly found Jesus with a lifted return pass but his volley was straight at Bazunu in the Saints goal. Jesus was in again after a long ball flighted over the head of Caleta-Car putting the Brazilian clean through until the defender dragged him back using both arms. There seemed to be enough contact for 3 separate penalties in there, but unbelievably the referee Robert Jones didn’t point to the spot and nor did VAR intervene. One of the most inexplicable decisions of the season, and that’s saying something, meant that Arsenal went in at the break only a single goal to the good.
The Southampton defence must have felt encouraged from not being penalised inside the box, as the fouling continued on Jesus outside the box for much of the second half, Lyanco getting away with man-handling Arsenal’s striker time and time again, wrapping both arms around his body whenever the ball was anywhere near the Brazilian. Jones did not however ignore perceived ‘diving’ from Saka showing him a yellow card for simulation, even though there did appear to be some contact. A one-sided refereeing performance and poor finishing from Arsenal allowed the home team back into the game and they got the equalising goal with 25 minutes to go through Armstrong after a swift move cut through Arsenal’s defence. In the 78th minute, Ødegaard thought he’d put Arsenal back in front but Tierney had just carried the ball beyond the line before he was able to cut it back into his captain’s path.
The Gunners had to settle for a point and an end to their winning run, paying the price for not scoring more in the first half. As they began to tire in the second half Southampton calved out some good chances of their own, but there’s no doubt the visitors were also harmed by a dire refereeing performance. The dropped points cut Arsenal’s lead at the top down to two. Another away game followed for The North London side as next they travelled to Eindhoven. With 2 group games remaining, they needed just 1 more win to secure the top spot which would mean they progressed straight through to the final 16, without the need for a playoff game. However Arsenal’s performance was poor, PSV were the better team for 90 minutes and good value for their 2-0 win.

I’m trying to determine the appropriate window air conditioner for certain attic bedrooms in my house. There are two bedrooms, each with electric outlets sharing one circuit. I am unsure of the amperage and have been advised to either add a dedicated outlet for a window unit or choose an efficient, low-wattage model.
I need assistance selecting the right air conditioner without changing any electrical outlets. I’m considering options like an 8000 BTU, 5000 BTU, or a Midea U-shaped unit known for its efficiency and quietness. My preference is the Midea U-shaped model if it’s suitable.
My main concern is avoiding unnecessary installation and disassembly efforts. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!

TWBS Previous Next First
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---Esme’s perspective---
---Saturday, 11th of November, 2682 Terran Calendar---
---Southern England---
Fucking Sussex!
‘Can you send me to the Forth Valley?’
‘Oh, we can try… On an unrelated note, how’s your standard English? No problems in communicating?’
I should’ve just said ‘No, I have great difficulty in communicating in anything but Lallans Scots!’ instead of putting on my poshest English speech register to say ‘Marjorie dearest, would you be a lamb and pass another buttered scone… hold the raspberry jam, it’s far too spicy for me!’ which she told me she’d take as a ‘Yes.’
“This is an English language barracks. If you have been directed here in error, please make yourself known to barracks staff for reassignment.” plays a loud, prerecorded Welsh language announcement, over speakers.
They’re fucking rubbing it in!
“This is an English language barracks. If you have been directed here in error, please make yourself known to barracks staff for reassignment.” it repeats in Scots Gaelic.
“Ceci est une caserne Anglophone. Si vous avez été assigné ici par erreur, veuillez vous faire connaître auprès du personnel de la caserne pour une réaffectation.” it says in what I’m 90% sure is a French version of the same announcement (I can’t be certain, though, as that’s not one of my languages).
Looking at the crowds, queuing to get in, makes me regret asserting that I didn’t need transport here.
‘You shouldn’t be sending someone to War that you don’t trust to navigate themself from Galloway to Sussex!’ were my exact words.
I brushed off the recruitment officer saying that I’d be processed faster if I arrived on Military organised transport.
Well, standing here’s not gonna get me to the front of the queue now, is it!
I walk forward to join the massive throng of people, almost all of which look to be about my age.
It’s astonishing how short you feel, being an average height girl in a crowd of people!
178cm really isn’t all that much when you’ve got a not insignificant number of +2m guys here!
Even guys who are the average 188cm can make a girl feel short when their packed too close…
I see a few Neanderthal hunks… perhaps conscription won’t be all bad(!)
When I make it to the front of the line, the guy just stares expectantly at me like I’m supposed to already know what to do.
“Y’awright?… Err… mah nam’s Esme Reid…?” I say, hesitantly, in perfectly comprehensible speech.
“I’m sorry, would you repeat that?” he answers, looking at me like I just spoke to him in fucking Chinese!
“Greetings, gracious sir! You may kindly refer to me by the name ‘Esme Reid’!” I say, affecting my supercilious Southern English gentlewoman accent.
“Alright, Ms Reid. Please present your draft papers and identification.”
The balls they have to ask me to prove who I am when they’re the ones asking me to go off and fucking die for them!
I think about quipping that I should ask him to show me some proof that this is a legitimate Military installation sanctioned by the government of Sol… but think better of it…
Instead, I pull out my draft papers and my holopad, quickly getting up my identification app.
The man scans the code with his own holo and spends a few seconds glancing from his screen to my face and back.
Seeming satisfied that I’m not attempting to enlist under a false identity (for whatever strange reason a person might want to do that) he glances at my papers, says “Everything seems to be in order.” and waves a hand in front of a machine which whirs for half a second before spitting out a simple chain necklace with two little metal rectangles hanging off of it.
He hands it to me and says “This is your identification tag. Please check that the information on it is correct and, if it is, put it on and never take it off.”
I check the tag.
“You’ve got my name and birthday right…” I say, making a conscious effort to keep my speech register in that that a standard English speaker would consider acceptable “…don’t know about the regiment and serial number.”
“Those will be correct.” he says with a ‘move along’ tone.
I shrug, raise the dogtag over my head and drop it around my neck.
I walk on and he’s serving the girl behind me before I’ve even rounded the counter.
I’m ushered through the barracks, herded by the staff, until I reach a building labelled ‘Billet House 279’.
It doesn’t really look like I expected soldiers’ digs to look.
Definitely prefabbed but sort of has more the look of a uni hall than anything else… though I think it’s probably a bit much to expect that I’ll get a room to myself(!)
I follow the throng of draftees through to a wide open room, on the ground floor, that looks like it’s normally a cafeteria.
The camp attendants (who I’m guessing were in the same boat as us, not too long ago) direct us to stand along the left, right and nearside walls, keeping the back wall and centre of the room clear.
Everyone in place, there follows a few minutes of silence broken only by people whispering to one another.
Then, she enters the room.
Dark skinned and clad in green camo clothing, her scalp is easily visible between her cornrows with nary a hair out of place.
Her expression looks absolutely indifferent with just the slightest hint of a curled lip.
From the broadness and flatness of her facial features as well as her single mauve eye, she is clearly half Tshwane… though, you’d never guess that from her stature!
Female Tshwane average nearly 2m… the men are more like 2.2m!
She’s shorter than me!
She’s also built like a Sapiens, not the willowy thinness typical of Tshwane
I guess genetics interact in funny ways sometimes…
Based on her age, her Tshwane parent would probably have to have been one of the very first to be cloned back!
The other eye seems to have been ripped out at some point because in its place is a bionic and there’s a patch of hypopigmented scar tissue, forming a tear shape, at the right corner.
“Recruits… Welcome to the United Terran Coalition Infantry Trainin’ Camp, Graffham… My name is Warrant Officer Simone Sands… and I’ll be your drill instructor…” says the woman, cooly, speaking in a rough sounding, London accent.
The surname ‘Sands’ probably means her dad was the Tshwane (though not necessarily… she might have been given her mum’s surname… or it might be a coincidental English surname).
“…You all know why you’re here… Most of you’ve prob’ly already lost loved ones to this War… You are here to defend our right to exist… and I can’t think of a more worthy reason to fight than that…”
I’ve decided I like this woman… She may be English but I’ll try not to hold that against her(!)
“The first thing I need to tell all of you is that, by the end of your trainin’, you will NOT like me…” she says, as if reading my mind “…that’s OK. My job ain’t to be liked, my job ain’t to make friends… my job is to make soldiers!”
She casts her biological and bionic eyes around the room, letting her words hang in the air.
“Note… that I said ‘soldiers’… This ain’t Full Metal Jacket. This ain’t the 20th Century. There’ll be no Pvt Piles here!… I ain’t aimin’ to destroy your minds or your individuality. I ain’t goin’ to physic’ly and psychologic’ly abuse you into becomin’ robots or killers… I am makin’ you into soldiers… Regardless… this process will not be easy! In fact, it may well be the hardest thing you ever do!… As the face of this process, you will come to hate and resent me for it!… I hope for it! The more you hate me the more-DO YOU HAVE SOMETHIN’ TO SAY, PRIVATE?!”
Everyone in the room is startled by the authoritative woman breaking herself off to shout angrily at someone on the other side of the room.
“STEP FORWARD AND SPEAK SO EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU!”
The boy that steps forward is tall, bulky and muscular with a handsome, half Neanderthal face… just my type!
Then he has to go and ruin it by opening his mouth.
“I was just saying… that I find it somewhat difficult to take you seriously as a commanding officer… You just seem a little bit… little.” says the boy in the poshest, smarmiest English drawl I’ve ever heard!
The woman does not shout, she does not scream, she doesn’t snarl or even purse her lips!
She just nods, as if considering his words, then asks “What’s your name, Soldier?”
“Rupert Forest.” responds the boy, proudly.
“And, how tall are you, Pvt Forest?” responds the woman, unimpressed
“195cm.” he answers.
“And, what’s your mass?” she asks.
“110kg.”
“I see, I see… So, by your logic… you’d make a better drill sergeant than me, would you? You’re 25cm taller and 35kg heavier, afterall!”
He smirks “I wouldn’t presume to say so, Ma’am…” in a way that definitely suggests that he thinks he would.
She seems to consider that for some moments before answering “Alright then, fight me for it!”
“I’m sorry…?” responds the poshboy.
“You heard me… Clearly, you got no respect for skill and experience but it seems like you must respect power… so fight me for it! You win, you get to train this lot, I win, you never question my authority again!”
Is this woman mad!?
She may be a soldier but this boy she just challenged is a half Neanderthal giant!
She’s gonna lose!
I do not want to be drilled by some snotty, privileged English brat who got here at the same time as I did and just couldn’t keep his fucking mouth shut!
Then again, I don’t really want to be drilled by a woman so delusional that she felt the best way to squash insubordination was to challenge a man she has no hope of beating, either!
The guy is clearly salivating over the power that’s just been slapped on the table in front of him as he answers “I accept your terms, Ms Sands…” with faux magnanimity.
There’s no way they’d let a Private run drills, is there? When he wins, someone just needs to go and complain and they’ll give us another (less stupid) drill sergeant… right?
He strips off his jacket to reveal a pair of thick, muscular arms that (in spite of his repulsive personality) are a thrilling sight.
He has to go and ruin it by flexing and posing, clearly revelling in the room’s worth of gasps he got when he revealed his arms… He obviously likes being the centre of attention.
“Done?” asks Sands, drily.
“If you still want to do this…” he says, smugly “…you could just concede defeat and I’m sure no one would hold it against you!”
Her lip curls as she answers “But… if I did that, no one would learn nothin’, now would they…”
He shrugs before launching himself at her without waiting for her to give the word to begin.
She whirls out of the way and he snatches at her, unsuccessfully, as his momentum carries him past.
“Lesson 1:…” she shouts while snapping into the space behind him and kicking out his knee “…size does not determine victory, strength does not determine victory…” levelling another powerful kick between his shoulderblades to bring him to the ground.
She backs off, allowing him to scramble to his feet and turn to face her, hunched in readiness and scowling.
“…Pvt Forest here looked at me with contempt on account of my small size and, though he didn’t say so, I’d guess that my rough accent, my lack of a graduate epithet and my lack of a penis also played a roll in his judgin’ me as less than!… He thought he could beat me, he probably still DOES, and, ’causa that, he didn’t respect my ability to lead…!”
Forest makes another lunge for the smaller woman, misses and is punished for it by being knocked back to the floor.
I’m agog as I watch this little woman… there’s no other word but toy with the giant man!
“…but victory does not care how big you are, how strong you are, how classy or educated you are or what’s in your pants or panties…!”
She dodges around his arm and pins his chest to the floor with her knee.
“Discipline and trainin’ determine victory!… Things that I have and Pvt Forest LACKS!… Things that ALL of you will acquire, over the next 8 months!!!” she turns her head down to the mountain of man she’s pinning to the floor “Concede, Private!”
The man shakes his head, trying in vain to leverage himself up.
“Alright then… Lesson 2: When faced with a resistant individual, compliance can be effectively enforced by the expedient of lockin’ their joints to induce PAIN!!!”
She grabs his thick arms by the wrists and pulls them backwards in a way they are not meant to bend!
He screams in agony!
“CONCEDE!!!… Don’t make me send you to the Medical Officer! It’d be inconvenient for BOTH of us if your pride makes you miss your first week of trainin’ while your arms heal!!!”
He holds out for two more seconds before screaming “I concede! I CONCEDE!!!”
She releases him and stands back up.
“On your feet, Soldier…” she growls down at him.
He stands back up, his face beet red.
“Are you ever goin’ to question my fitness to instruct again, Private?” she glares up at the humiliated giant.
“No.” he answers, gracelessly.
“No…?” she says as if waiting for something else.
Forest looks as confused as I am about what she’s expecting.
“No, Ma’am!” she snarls.
“No, Ma’am.”
“Good, we’ll work on your attitude, movin’ forward. Now, get back in line!”
The humiliated man picks up his civvy jacket and returns to the place he was called out from.
“Now, I don’t think I need to prattle on anymore about how you’re gonna hate me by the end of our time together, do I?… I think Pvt Forest helped me prove that point quite well, so I’ll move on… You will sleep in this buildin’, six to a room. Your rooms will be gender segregated. If you wish for a place to be… intimate with people of the opposite gender, you may request use of one of the conjugal rooms… I suggest you do the same if you want to be intimate with a same gender partner but that’s between you and your roommates! You will eat in this room at 0700hrs, 1200hrs and 1800hrs. Diet’ry requirements will be accommodated but, bare in mind, this ain’t your mummies’ and daddies’ kitchen! ‘This food is forbidden by my religion/personal ethics’ is a diet’ry requirement. ‘I am allergic to this food’ is a diet’ry requirement! ‘I don’t like how this food tastes’ is not(!)… In the mornin’s, you will be receivin’ lessons in lecture theatres, workshops and the like…”
“Oh great… just what I wanted after leaving school(!) More classrooms(!)” I mutter to myself.
Her head instantly wheels to me with unnerving precision.
“Someone else with somethin’ they’d like to say!?” she says, locking eyes with me, terrifyingly.
“No, Ms Sands!” I answer, instantly.
“Miss?! I’m not your bloody schoolteacher girl!!!”
Everyone laughs. Even Pvt Forest, like he wasn’t just humiliated himself, 2 minutes ago!
“Ma’am… err… Ma’am, no, Ma’am!!!” I say, doing my best to emulate the tone I’ve seen soldiers use in films.
She rolls her eye (it’s difficult to tell if the bionic rolls too) and says “Better… What’s your name, Private?”
“Ma’am, the Private’s name is Esme Reid, Ma’am!!!”
“Do you remember me tellin’ you this ain’t Full Metal Jacket?… You don’t need to scream when you talk to me, you don’t need to refer to yourself in third person and one ‘Ma’am’, when you’re done speakin’, is enough, Reid!”
“Yes, Ma’am.”
She points to her single, mauve eye, then to me and says “I’ll have my eye on you, Reid!”
Somehow, her tone sends a chill up my spine but I do my best not to show it.
She turns away and I release a silent sigh of relief.
“As I was sayin’… In your lectures you will learn the ins and outs of military theory; tactics, strategies, logistics etc. You will learn as much as we can tell you about the nature of the species we are fightin’; their capabilities, tendencies, political organisations and known weaknesses… bear in mind that First Contact weren’t much more than 4 years ago and we’ve been at War for almost all the intervenin’ time, so a lot of what we teach you will be little more than guesswork and hearsay from prisoners we’ve interrogated… The mornin’s’ll also be where you learn the particulars of the equipment you’ll be expected to be proficient with in the field. This includes firearms, plasmaweaponry and durasteel armour, as well as the tech you’ll likely encounter from the opposite side; kinetic pulse weapons, laser weapons, field emitters etc… I strongly suggest that no one allows word to get back to me that they’re not takin’ these classes seriously!… A stupid soldier is a dead soldier!”
She glares around the room, her eyes resting on me four a quarter of a second.
“…In the afternoons and evenin’s, you’ll be doing PT… that’s ‘Physical Trainin’’… soon to be every one of your two least favourite words in the English Language(!) “
I notice a wry smirk twist the mouths of a few of the camp attendants.
“In PT you will be drilled in agility, endurance, close quarters combat and coordinated marching… Five times over the comin’ 8 months, you and your trainin’ partner will be dropped into a remote bit of wilderness, somewhere on Earth, for five day practical survival experience. You will be given a beacon, to summon retrieval, but these are only to be used in cases of actual threat to life or bodily integrity… not because you’re feelin’ miserable!”
She takes a second to pause for breath.
“You get an allowance of 12 days off, over your time here… that’s two a month… These are subject to my approval and I may deny them for any reason, including no reason… so don’t piss me off!… You may not take more than 2 consecutive days leave at a time! Certain classes are mandatory and leave will not be approved on days they occur. If your allowance is spent, no more leave will be approved, barring a real emergency!… Now, for today, you are going to line up to have your maps and room keys downloaded onto your holos when your name is called, then you are going to have your bodies scanned for your armour measurements… at that point everyone with no uterus has the rest of the day free to settle in… If you have a uterus, you’ll need to report to medical to get your cycle paused! This is, I’m afraid, nonoptional… You are not prohibited from engaging in relations with your fellow recruits but you cannot be a soldier while you’re able to get pregnant. Attempts to circumvent this requirement in any way will land you in the Stockade!… After your cycle pause has been given, you’ll also have the rest of the day to settle in… Enjoy it! It’ll be the most downtime you get for a while!… Finally… I believe we have a 17 year old with us here… Pvt Taylor?”
A few people put their hands up, most looking confused.
“Pvt Oskar Taylor! The 17 year old?” she says, exasperated.
All but one of those with their hands up put them down.
The one remaining Pvt Taylor with his hand in the air has pale skin, black hair, brown eyes and a sharp featured face wearing a dour expression.
He stands even taller than Forest… Nearly 2m tall!
Though he’s not quite as heavily built, he’s certainly a good looking piece of boycandy!
“Pvt Taylor…” says Sands, her mouth breaking into a smile for the first time I’ve seen “…couldn’t wait to go off to War, could you(?)”
He mutters something but, while I can hear the power and deepness of his voice, I can’t make out a word he says.
“You’ll have to speak up, Taylor! Nobody’ll be able to hear you if you mumble.” points out Sands.
“I said I had some personal circumstances that made this the most sensible course of action for me, Ma’am.” says the tall, dark haired man, looking over her head rather than down at her and speaking in a grim monotone. He definitely loses boycandy points for the poshness of his accent, unfortunately…
“I see… I won’t pry into that but… you didn’t think of Officer Training? That’s the route that most people take when volunteering ahead of their conscription.”
He shakes his head “I thought of it and decided against it, Ma’am.”
“Oh? Why’s that, Pvt Taylor?”
“I didn’t believe I would make a good officer, Ma’am.” he answers simply.
She laughs “I wish every soldier could be as introspective, Taylor! I like you!… Unfortunately, bein’ a minor does mean that you can’t be put in a room with others… Sooo, that means you get a room to yourself… for the moment. Might sound cushy but before anyone else gets too jealous, bare in mind that privacy is the only advantage! His room will be a sixth the size of yours so its basic’ly a broomcupboard… the disadvantage will be severely reduced opportunity to socialise!… If that doesn’t sound doable, you can leave and come back when you turn 18, Taylor.”
“It’s acceptable, Ma’am.” he says without hesitating.
Yeah… it’s official… I don’t like him…
---later---
I rub the spot on my arm where the serum was thunked into me about 15 minutes ago.
Like with everything else about conscription, I get it… I understand the point…
But seeing the sense doesn’t mean I have to like it!
It’s not like I want to get pregnant (getting a nine month reprieve from service would be a fairly shitty reason for me to bring a child into the world) but it does feel like one last slap in the face to my personal autonomy that I’ve just had a cycle pause fucking mandated upon my body by the government!
As I draw near, door 1512 detects the key downloaded on my holo and unlocks
I open it and am greeted by a blonde girl, smiling broadly and instantly identifiable as brimming with ADHD energy.
“Hey there! My name’s Charlotte, it’s lovely to meet you!” says the girl, wrapping me in a hug without asking if I’m OK with that.
Her accent makes me wonder if everyone I meet here is going to be a posh toff!
She makes three of three of my fellow draftees!
“A pleasure, Charlotte… the name’s Esme…” I say, speaking Scottish accented standard English and gingerly patting her back.
“Oh, you’re Scottish…?” she says pulling herself off me with an expression that suggests meeting a Scottish person is just the most wonderful thing she could have imagined “…My great grandmother was from Edinburgh, where are you from?”
“Stranraer.” I answer.
She frowns “I don’t know it, I’m sorry!”
“I won’t hold it against you… Southwestern tip of Scotland? Where it nearly touches Ireland and the Man Peninsula?… ’Bout two and a half million people?”
“Oh, wooow! I don’t think I’ve ever met someone from a village before!” she says, seeming entirely oblivious to how that might be taken as an insult.
“Yeah… I guess it’s not that big.”
“Well…” she wraps me back in the hug and continues “…we’re the first ones to the room and that has to mean we’re going to be best friends!”
“I’m afraid my best friend’s name is Tamsin… the position is not open.” I say, firmly setting a boundary.
“I meant best bootcamp friends, silly!” she says, as if that should have gone without saying.
“Alright… I guess that positions open… but you’ve not got the job yet(!)” I quip, warming up a little to the ball of posh English energy.
She pulls back and beams at me “Alright then, for my first act as best bootcamp friend candidate, let me show you the view!… That should earn me some points!”
She says, leading me into the room that’s so small it makes me doubt that that goody-two-shoes 17 year old can possibly have one a sixth this size!
She leads me to the window and spends a few moments making sure I’m positioned just right before she draws back the curtain.
The view is quite breathtaking… rolling hills of snow blanketed mammoth steppe, lit by evening sun, with barely any of the sprawling military camp visible.
Though, you can see one of the tallest structures ever built by Humanity… the Sussex Space elevator… several times the Earth’s own diameter, the ‘top’, if you can even call it that, is a fifth of the way from here to Luna! …And… in 8 months, I’m going to be riding it, all the way up, to get on a troop transport.
“Look! See! There’s a herd of aurochs over on that hill! You know this place used to be a national park, before even Unification or the Reset! It’s called the South Downs! My mum told me we had family from here… obviously I never met any of them because they would have left hundreds of years ago!…”
The bubbly girl talks and talks and… just keeps talking… but I don’t particularly mind.
---
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TWBS Previous Next First

This is my headcanon for the events following Suzerain as the game played out in my (communist) playthrough:
Disclaimer 1: This obviously includes many spoilers from the game.
Disclaimer 2: This story is written with storytelling and lore at the forefront, not necessarily gameplay accuracy.
(Part 2 is on my page if you can't find it elsewhere)
Disclaimer 3: This is only the first chapter (and backstory) of this headcanon story/fanfic/whatever you want to call it. I want to write more, but would like to see what people in the Suzerain community think about the writing so far and if they’d like to see more of it. :)
Background:
Anton Rayne got elected President of Sordland in his first term by promising progress and an end to the recession. In his term, he managed to fulfill these promises and more.
He ended the recession through several economic programs including an infrastructure program that included the building of a highway in Agnland, the distribution of stimulus checks for people in need, an agricultural revitalisation program in the city of Sarna, an economic revitalisation program in the greater region of Bergia, and the establishment of the Fair Trade and Competition Commission.
Rayne had also enacted his foreign policy that prioritised self-determination and non-intervention, which resulted in improved relations with many nations and many new trade deals with Wehlen, Agnolia, and Valgsland. In slight contrast with this policy, however, Rayne entered Sordland into the Contanan Security Pact. While this move alienated Sordland from some western-alligned nations such as Lespia and Arcasia, it increased trade and cooperation with nations of the east and many of the rising powers in Rika and Xina.
Rayne had also enacted gradual reforms of the economic direction of the country by nationalising several large corporations, most notably Gasom and Bergia steel. In order to temporarily appease the oligarchs, Rayne had through his nationalisation of Bergia steel, let Marcel Koronti, one of Sordland’s most powerful oligarchs, increase his power within his circle of oligarchs. He had also, through the extra income the state had earned from nationalisation and trade deals, been able to cut taxes for all, which further appeased the oligarchs. Rayne, as a communist, saw the oligarchs as a threat, however, he saw the sollists, nationalists, and fascists as a bigger threat that required a temporary appeasement of the oligarchs in order to focus on a larger threat within the nation. Towards the end of his term, however, when the old guard had in large part been brought down, Rayne removed the independence of Sordland’s central bank, a body of financial governing that had long been an extension of the power of the Lothenburg Group.
One of Rayne’s big promises of progressive reform included an increase in the healthcare and education budgets. This was also a promise Rayne was able to deliver on, and through the skillful leadership of education minister Ciara Walda and healthcare minister Paskal Beniwoll, the government was able to efficiently use this budget to make many positive changes to the education and healthcare systems in Sordland.
The increased healthcare budget was used to improve the quality of healthcare services provided in the country, especially in rural areas, as well as a complete subsidisation of dental care and prescription medicine for all and the relocation of doctors to rural areas. The Rayne administration also enacted several taxes on consumer products harmful to the health of the people, including a tax on tobacco and alcohol products.
The large educational reform that Rayne embarked on included a large scholarship program for impoverished families, the building of several hundred schools across rural areas of the country, and the relocation of teachers to rural areas. The reform also radically changed the curriculum of Sordish schools, with desollinisation of schools and an implementation of critical pedagogy and a larger focus on science, physical education, and the teaching of subjects unburdened by sollism. Rayne later established rural education institutes across rural areas of Sordland in order to further improve the availability and quality of education in rural Sordland.
The rights of women and minorities also became a critical issue for the Rayne administration. The first lady, Monica Rayne became a large figurehead in the battle against patriarchy and alongside Ciara Walda they established the Commission on the Status of Women and passed the women’s liberation act that included policies that helped victims of domestic violence, abolished the gender pay gap, affirmed equal access to education for all, and enacted maternity leave laws and state-funded daycare. The support of this commission and its policies, along with Rayne’s personal funding of the Sordish League of Women made them a loyal political ally to Rayne and his inner circle.
President Rayne also became known for his pro-Bludish sentiment that led to a political alliance with Mansoun Leke and the declaration of the minority rights act, the establishment of the minority rights commission that would be headed by Leke, and the granting of amnesty to soll-era political prisoners, many of which were Bludish activists.
Rayne’s other progressive reforms included a vast expansion of the sordish welfare program, that came to include the establishment of the Comission of Social Progress and Uplift, the workers rights act that gave better pay and better conditions to workers across Sordland, two new social benefits programs, one for the unemployed and one for impoverished families, as well as a complete subsidy of public transport and a lowering of the retirement age.
As a communist and subscriber to the ideas of Karlos Marcias, Rayne believed that for Sordland to enter a new age of socialism and communism, the power of the existing dictatorship of the bourgeoisie had to be toppled and replaced with a dictatorship of the proletariat. He saw the judiciary and legislature as being tools of the bourgeoisie. However, the presidency, now under a communist president, was Sordland’s chance for the establishment of a dictatorship of the proletariat. Rayne believed that he had to topple the bourgeois institutions of government, and replace them with new ones that represented the proletariat. During his first term, he started doing this with a very risky play. Namely reforming the constitution to give wide-ranging powers to the presidency while he continued to build a dictatorship of the proletariat.
The constitutional reforms included the replacement of the presidential veto with a pocket veto, removing the supreme court’s power to vote on constitutional amendments, removing the ability for the president to be impeached, decreasing the electoral threshold to 8% thus allowing Rayne’s Bludish and communist allies into the legislature, removing the requirement of reviews of presidential decrees, removing the immunity of judges, and abolishing the honorary position and immunity of Tarquin Soll.
Rayne used his new powers to crush the reactionary forces of Sordland, starting with a complete reshuffling of the supreme court. As an extension of the removal of Tarquin Soll’s immunity, Soll was then put on trial in front of a new supreme court that found him guilty and sentenced him to life in prison. After Soll’s imprisonment the Rayne administration started their de-sollinisation efforts in full. Rayne also established the anti-corruption police that he used to investigate corruption within the old guard.
The ACP found evidence of several sollists collaborating with the Young Sords in order to assassinate communist politician Bernard Circas. The investigation led to the arrest of many sollist politicians, most notably minister of interior Lilias Graff and former members of the supreme court Orso Hawker and Heron Garaci. With the old guard crippled, Rayne took advantage of the situation in order to change the manifesto of the United Sordland Party to move away from sollism and towards socialism.
In order to further consolidate his power, Rayne used his presidential decree powers to purge the general staff and thus remove the military’s power in internal political affairs. In the aftermath of this purge, minister of defence Iosef Lancea was also made commander of the sordish armed forces in place of Valken Kruger. Rayne also established the Sordish Radio and Television Supreme Council that he primarily used to further rein in the propaganda spread by the old guard, liberals and oligarchs. Rayne also started funding the Red Youth, an organisation he had previously been a member of, thus winning him another political ally outside of government.
The rising threat of Rumburg was also handled during Rayne’s first term. Using his diplomatic skill as a former diplomat in the foreign ministry, Rayne de-escalated the conflict and made Rumburg appear as an aggressor on the world stage. Any uncertainty about the threat of invasion was then put to rest when Rayne entered Sordland into a military alliance with Valgsland and later joined the Contanan Security Pact.
But as elections approached instability within the Rayne cabinet appeared. First with a political scandal that led to the arrest of Illana Vance, the Rumburg spy that had posed as President Rayne’s assistant. This scandal also led to Vice President Petr Vectern resigning, retiring from politics, and going to rehab. Lucian Galade was appointed Vice President in his stead. The instability continued however, with the resignation of several ministers including minister of economy Symon Holl due to ideological differences with the President, minister of health Paskal Beniwoll due to concern for the President’s machiavellian tactics, and minister of justice Nia Morgna and minister of education Ciara Walda both due to the President’s constitutional reforms.
This flood of resignations coupled with the arrest of minister of interior Lileas Graf and the retirement of foreign minister Deivid Wisci left a vacuum of power within the administration that Rayne had a clear plan on how to fill after his reelection.
After the election, the results came in with a big change in the political environment of Sordland. The USP came in first with a slight increase in votes since the 1953 election, the NFP came in second, thus becoming the second biggest party in the country, and the PFJP suffered a loss, losing a significant amount of votes to the USP, BFP, WPB, and CPS. The Communist party of Sordland finally made the threshold and due to the popularisation of communism under the Rayne administration they were able to become a legislative power to rival the PFJP. The Workers party of Bludia were unable to make the threshold however, due to the Bludish vote being split between the WPB and the BFP.
As Rayne took to the stage for his victory speech, he reaffirmed his commitment to a turn to the left and to the east and promised further expansion of Sordland’s welfare system and political and social reforms. He declared that this was the start of the Sordish Revolution.
Chapter 1: Inauguration Day
In the aftermath of Rayne’s victory speech and after meeting with the people of Sordland at a USP rally, Anton Rayne entered the black presidential car and was met with a smile through the rear-view mirror and the eternally joyful voice of his driver, Serge, greeting him: “That was a great speech Mr. President, I am glad you got re-elected. Where to now?” Rayne smiled slightly as he always did when hearing the voice of the man who had become one of his closest friends during the last four years. “I am glad to hear that Serge, thank you for all of your support these years, I am really grateful for all your kind words.” Rayne took a slight pause before continuing “We’re off to 137 Wisci Avenue.” “Right away, sir.”
As the two sat in the car in momentary silence, Anton regretted having to leave his wife and daughter at the rally with Lucian. But Monica was strong, he thought to himself. She would be able to handle herself against Lucian if he were to try anything. After another few moments of silence, it was finally broken when Anton realised this wasn’t the same car he had been chauffeured around in earlier in the day. It was similar enough he hadn’t noticed, but it was newer and frankly more comfortable to sit in. “When did you get a new car, Serge?” “Finally noticed it, eh Mr. President?” He continued “But it isn’t my car, it’s yours, you’re the President, I am merely your driver” “The car was a gift. Sent from Chancellor Hegel in Valgsland, as a congratulatory gift for winning the elections. It seems you made quite the impact on him when you visited him in Haelm.” Anton adjusted his posture in his seat and asked Serge what he thought of the Chancellor. “Oh, I don’t follow the politics of other countries that closely sir, but if he made a deal with you he must be a smart man.” Rayne, slightly tired after the rally, simply replied “You’re too kind, Serge” and resorted to staring out the window as the ride continued through the streets of Holsord.
After a while, the two men in the car started to see a gradual decline in the quality of the houses and infrastructure on the streets as they got further from the hill of pride. Once the car rolled onto Wisci Avenue there seemed to be a slight improvement in the quality of the street, however it was still a far cry from the hill of pride. Suddenly the car stopped. “Here we are, sir. 137 Wisci Avenue.” Before Anton could say thank you, Serge was already outside of the car opening the door for his president. Anton stepped out and was then able to thank his driver for the pleasant drive and conversation.
He stepped onto the cracked pavement as Serge got back into the car. Anton instinctively put his hands in his trouser pockets, only to find a packet of cigarettes there. As he took them out of his pocket he was reminded of the time he had caught his son, Franc, smoking, and he further was reminded of the promise he made to Franc to stop smoking. Granted it had become easier to stop after the tobacco tax had been implemented, but it was still a difficult task. Anton promised himself he would call Franc when he got home to see how he was faring in medical school in United Contana. He looked back at Serge and called out his name. “Could you take this and throw it away for me?” Anton threw his last packet of cigarettes to Serge who nodded back at him in acknowledgement. “Thanks, Serge. I’ll be back in a few minutes.” Anton said as he walked into the building ahead.
It was a two-story flat-building, more specifically it was the home of Ciara Walda, among other people. As the President walked into the building he was surprised by the interior, which was far more well kept than he expected. As he walked up the stairs however, there was still a quite distinct creak with every step he took. When Anton reached the top he stood directly in front of a door that said “1B Walda Residence”. Rayne knocked on the door and was soon met with a slightly dishevelled former minister of education. Ciara looked her usual self for the most part, aside from looking quite a lot less put together than usual. She was sporting an old bathrobe and slippers, as opposed to her usual political uniform of a pantsuit or dress. “Mr. President?” Ciara blurted out, trying to hide her slight surprise at the situation. “Please Ciara, you don’t work for me anymore, and I know you don’t care for formalities.” Ciara slightly adjusted herself and tried to put on her poker face she had become known for during her time in politics. “Would you care for a drink, Anton?” She didn’t wait for a reply however and simply entered her home, leaving Anton to catch the door and come inside.
“Tea would be nice” Anton replied as he walked into Ciara’s flat. He heard a call from the kitchen “Already started making it.” Anton let out a slight chuckle at Ciara’s unique demeanour as he followed her voice to find his way to the kitchen. The flat was a lot nicer than he expected. Far from luxurious, but it was nicely decorated and brightly lit with large windows, something that was somewhat surprising given that this flat belonged to Ciara Walda of all people.
As Anton found the kitchen, Ciara had already moved into the living room with two cups of tea in her hands. Anton sat down across from her and thanked her for the tea as she sat it down on the coffee table. “I suppose congratulations are in order” she said with a barely detectable sadness in her voice. “I hope congratulations will be in order for you too” Anton said, giving Ciara a slightly puzzled look on her face. Before she could ask what the President meant, he continued “Rejoin my cabinet. I know you miss it.” He paused for a brief moment, “And I need you.” he continued. “You are a talented politician, but you’ve been able to keep your ideals. I need ministers like you. I know you don’t approve of my methods but who will you support if not me? Ricter? Kibener? Leke and Stahler don’t stand much of a chance without my support, so by supporting either of them, you’d be supporting me still. Why not take that opportunity to rejoin the cabinet and make some real change again. Continue the reforms you started with me and Monica.”
Ciara looked down for a few seconds before replying “You know why I left. You know I cannot stand by and support your constitutional reforms, they aren’t democratic and-” Before she could continue, Anton cut her off “What would be democratic then?” He paused before continuing to speak “To give power to an indirectly elected assembly of capitalist leeches and fascists who want to kill half the country and oppress the other? To keep the institutions put in place by a sour old man who wants to stop the world from moving on?” That last comment about Soll made Ciara chuckle slightly. “I’ve never heard you talk about him like that.” Anton replied with a smile “Well, I couldn’t bad-mouth that old fool too much when his lackeys still had such a firm grasp on the country.”
“Listen, I know you might not support my constitutional changes, but-” Before he continued he stopped to rephrase himself “You are familiar with Marcian dialectical materialism I assume?” Ciara looked slightly offended. “Of course I am” “Who do you think you’re talking to?” She said with a slight scoff. “So then you know that class struggle is an antagonistic struggle. You know that capitalists won’t give away the means of production willingly. Oppressors must be taken down by force, not by the systems that gave them power in the first place.” Anton sighed “I know it isn’t ideal, but it isn’t supposed to be. If Karlos Marcias taught us anything, it’s that ideals don’t bring change, material conditions do. Reality does. And reality is messy. Ideals are pure, but as long as they remain that way they are just ideas, they cannot bring real change if they cannot exist within material reality. What does this idealist notion of liberal democracy mean compared to the real material change that comes with socialism?” Ciara sat back on her couch and sighed deeply, looking at Anton the entire time. “I still don’t know, it just doesn’t seem right.” They sat in silence for over a minute before Anton got up and sighed for a final time in defeat. “Thank you for your service to the people of Sordland, we’re going to miss you Ciara. Both me and Monica”. Ciara looked back down at her floor after Anton stopped talking and started walking towards the door.
“Wait” she said as he was on his way out. Anton turned back around. “You stood by me in my educational reforms, you stood by me-” she stopped for a moment “Us, you stood by us as we fought for the rights of our gender.” She looked away out her window for a brief few seconds, “I’m not sure even Leke or Stahler would’ve done that. At least to such an extent. I owe you at least another chance. Both you and Monica” she said with a slight glimmer in her eyes. ”Thank
you Ciara. Really, thank you. Because between Gus, Iosef and Lucian, I could really use an ally in my cabinet” They both smiled at each other as Anton exited the flat. As he started walking down the stairs he heard the door open again. As he looked back Ciara bid him farewell “Good luck, Anton.” “You too, Ciara.”
As Anton walked out of the building he saw Serge leaning on the side of the car. As he noticed Anton he quickly stood upright and opened the backseat door for his President, bowing slightly as he did it. “I got a call while I was waiting for you sir. Your wife and daughter have left the rally along with your cabinet and are on their way to the maroon palace for the celebration dinner.”
While Anton’s first term had been ceremonially opened with a grand ball at the maroon palace, the event had ended catastrophically with the assassination of Bernard Circas, which drew a lot of bad press to the tradition. It had already been criticised before for its over-the-top extravagance, a criticism Anton agreed with. However, the event still occurred during Rayne’s first inauguration as it was still a quite popular affair, particularly with sollists who wanted to honour the traditions of the nation, and with oligarchs who wanted to take the opportunity to cosy up to politicians. But with the assassination, and the loss of power suffered by sollists and oligarchs during the first Rayne administration, it became easier, and frankly more popular, to replace the event with a more modest one. Namely a televised dinner with the President and his cabinet, along with their families.
Due to the wave of resignations at the end of Anton’s first term however, the dinner might come across as a little too modest though. Especially with Lucian who was married to his work, and Iosef who was married to his own idealised version of Sordland. It was unclear if Ciara would attend. She definitely knew about the event, as she was one of the people campaigning for an end to the inaugural ball. She was welcome to attend as she was to rejoin the cabinet, but Anton hadn’t thought to ask her. Especially as she wasn’t fond of any sort of ‘style over substance’ meeting.
Anton was brought out of his deep thoughts as Serge cleared his throat, and he realised he’d stood there for a solid half a minute. He shook his head for a moment and saw a bin in the corner of his eye that he hadn’t noticed stood next to the building he’d walked into. Anton noticed his packet of cigarettes laying there along with another pack that looked just as newly thrown away. He smiled to himself and walked into the car, letting Serge close the door behind him and get back into his own seat in the front.
“You trying to quit as well Serge?” The president’s driver looked shocked for a moment, as Anton realised what that might’ve sounded like. “Cigarettes.” he assured Serge. “Oh! I got a tad confused there for a second Mr. President.” he nervously tapped the steering wheel as he started the car's engine. “Yes! I’ve decided to quit Mr. President. I couldn’t have done it without you though! I saw the press conference you and Mr. Beniwoll did on television before he resigned, warning of the dangers of tobacco.” Anton grinned slightly as he heard Paskal’s name, before Serge continued. “And as I noticed you were throwing away your last pack, I thought I’d do the same. Follow the example of a great leader.”

I have a Frigidaire ffet3026tsc wall oven which recently starting shutting off. I've identified the problem being the lower oven cooling fan isn't spinning fast enough. I can run the top oven without issue and can both hear and feel air coming out of the vent above the top door. If I turn on the lower oven I can barely hear or feel any air coming out of its vent. Once it heats up (or immediately if the top oven is already heated) the whole unit kicks off completely with a loud beep. A few seconds later it comes back on with the clock flashing 12:00. It does not present any error codes.
Given the symptoms I assumed the lower fan was bad and ordered a new one (blower assembly part #139038301). When I got the oven out of the wall and replaced that part I fired it up and the issue persists. With the unit out of the wall I can see that the lower fan is spinning, just not very fast.
I called the customer support and the only troubleshooting step they had was to shut off and back on the power to the unit, which I had done multiple times in the past so I know that won't help. I'd like to avoid an expensive repair call and I'm reasonably handy so I can replace whatever part is causing the problem myself, I just need to figure out what part might be to blame. My next thought is to replace the board (part #316443913) but that is much more expensive so I'm more hesitant to just buy a new one to test if it is the problem.
Any help or advice is appreciated.

[looking for] a roommate or two to hunt 2-3 BR 2-3 bath apartment with for a 12 month+ lease starting Aug 1st ideally. 🙂 BUDGET: 1.6K - 2K WHERE (flexible): East of Manhattan: East Harlem, UES, Midtown, East Village, LES West of BK/Queens: Williamsburg, Greenpoint, Downtown BK, Bed-Stuy, LIC, Astoria, Sunnyside AMENITIES (ideal): In-unit W/D, gym, central heat/air, near a park, balcony/backyard, free pizzas (can this be a thing 😩).
Hiiii, I'm Saiyam, a trans-femme/non-binary (She/They) immigrant from Nepal, been living in Westchester NY for a decade. I work in Tech (BI/Analytics) remotely.
I am clean, organized, love animals, 420 friendly, chill, inquisitive, witty, thoughtful, forgetful, goofy, adventurous, amicable... trying to cook more lately, and be more physically and socially active.. Into: dance, ping pong, clubbing/dance bars, anime, ramen, all things superhero/fantasy shit, current global affairs, comedy, reality shows ( Love is blind??, Survivor ❤, The Amazing Race)/ Netflix, Barcade, mindfulness, petrichor, science, universe, art... I'm looking for a roommate(s) with whom I can be good friends with: go out to bars/clubs, explore the city, hike, bungee(?!), gas up/laugh at each other....
Open to any gender. Looking for those who are kind, conscientious, communicate directly, generally clean/tidy, interested to create a fun social life and a supportive dynamic 🙂 Please DM me if you think we'd be a good fit. If you're looking to fill in a room, Im also open to it. Have a great day, you beautiful peeps!

Hi all
We had a lightning storm here a few days ago and now two of our nests are acting strangely. In one case, I think the control board of an electric furnace / air handler (basement) may have been damaged, so separate topic.
However, on our main floor, I have a nest connected to AC with an internal air handler and Heat (gas furnace), and it appears to be getting power but is still shutting down. The unit is throwing no errors but runs out of battery.
Wiring has been good for 3 years so I am assuming that’s not it. No C wire has been installed because the unit seems to be getting power from the air handler on Rc, which has been fine.
In trying to figure out why the unit is losing power, I checked the air handler and associated compressor, no fuses blown.
Manually recharged the unit, tried to turn on the AC and sure enough it turns on, so I am assuming AC and Air Handler are OK. Again, wiring has not changed.
Power to the unit and wiring as follows. Any ideas? Thanks very much!!

If you are looking for the best massage chair Reddit in 2023, you might be wondering how to choose the right one for your needs and preferences. There are many factors to consider when buying a massage chair, such as your budget, space, health conditions, and personal taste. You also want to find a massage chair that has good reviews and feedback from Reddit users who have tried it.
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In this guide, we will help you find the best massage chair Reddit in 2023 by giving you some tips on how to choose a massage chair and recommending some of the top-rated massage chairs that have received positive feedback from Reddit users. We will also answer some of the most frequently asked questions about massage chairs and provide you with some resources to learn more about them.
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How to Choose a Massage Chair
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When choosing a massage chair, you need to consider four main factors: your budget, space, health conditions, and personal taste. Here are some tips on how to evaluate these factors and find the best massage chair for you.
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Budget
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Your budget is one of the most important factors to consider when buying a massage chair. Massage chairs can vary widely in price, from a few hundred dollars to several thousand dollars, depending on the quality, functionality, and design. You need to decide how much you are willing to spend on a massage chair and what features are essential for you.
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Generally speaking, the more expensive a massage chair is, the more advanced and comprehensive its massage functions are. For example, some high-end massage chairs can offer full-body massage, zero-gravity recline, air compression, heat therapy, music synchronization, and voice control. However, these features may not be necessary for everyone and may not fit your budget.
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If you are looking for a more affordable option, you can still find some good massage chairs that can provide basic massage functions such as kneading, tapping, rolling, and vibration. You can also look for discounts, coupons, or refurbished models to save some money.
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Space
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Another factor you need to consider when buying a massage chair is the space you have in your home or office. Massage chairs can take up a lot of space and may not fit in small rooms or tight corners. You need to measure the dimensions of the area where you want to place your massage chair and compare it with the dimensions of the massage chair you are interested in.
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You also need to consider the clearance space around the massage chair for reclining and moving. Some massage chairs can recline up to 180 degrees or slide forward to save space. You need to make sure there is enough room for these functions without blocking any doors, windows, or furniture.
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If you have limited space or want to move your massage chair around easily, you can opt for a portable or foldable massage chair. These types of massage chairs are usually lighter and smaller than regular massage chairs and can be stored away when not in use.
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Health Conditions
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The third factor you need to consider when buying a massage chair is your health conditions. Massage chairs can offer various benefits for your physical and mental health such as relieving stress, pain, tension, fatigue, improving blood circulation, posture, flexibility, mood, and sleep quality. However, some massage chairs may not be suitable for certain health conditions or may require medical consultation before use.
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For example, if you have any injuries, inflammation, infections, fractures, or wounds on your body, you should avoid using a massage chair or consult your doctor first. If you have any cardiovascular problems such as high blood pressure or heart disease, you should also be careful with using a massage chair or seek medical advice first. If you are pregnant or have any other medical conditions that may affect your sensitivity or response to massage therapy, you should also check with your doctor before using a massage chair.
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You should also pay attention to the intensity and duration of the massage sessions. Some massage chairs can offer adjustable levels of intensity and speed for different parts of your body. You should choose the level that is comfortable and safe for you and avoid overdoing it. You should also limit your massage sessions to no more than 15 to 30 minutes per day or as recommended by your doctor.
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Personal Taste
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The last factor you need to consider when buying a massage chair is your personal taste. Massage chairs can come in different styles, colors,
materials
and designs that can match your personality and preferences. You should choose a massage chair that appeals to you aesthetically and functionally.
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Some people may prefer a more traditional or classic look for their massage chair while others may like a more modern or futuristic look. Some people may prefer a more soft or plush feel for their massage chair while others may like a more firm or sturdy feel. Some people may prefer a more simple or minimalist design for their massage chair while others may like a more complex or sophisticated design.
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You should also consider the user-friendliness and convenience of the massage chair. Some massage chairs can offer easy-to-use controls such as remote controls, touch screens, or voice commands. Some massage chairs can also offer smart features such as Bluetooth connectivity, USB ports, speakers, or memory functions. You should choose a massage chair that is easy to operate and customize according to your needs and preferences.
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Best Massage Chair Reddit in 2023: Recommendations
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Now that you know how to choose a massage chair, here are some of the best massage chairs Reddit in 2023 that we recommend based on our research and experience. We have selected these massage chairs based on their features, quality, performance, reviews, and feedback from Reddit users who have tried them.
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Osaki OS-4000T Zero Gravity Massage Chair
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This massage chair is one of the most popular and best-selling massage chairs on the market. It offers a full-body massage with zero-gravity recline, air compression, heat therapy, and six pre-programmed modes. It also has a user-friendly remote control, a built-in speaker, and a timer function. It is available in four colors: black, brown, charcoal, and cream.
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Reddit users who have tried this massage chair have praised its comfort, quality, and functionality. They have also reported that it helps with pain relief, relaxation, and stress reduction. Some of the drawbacks that they have mentioned are its weight, size, and noise level.
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This massage chair is suitable for people who are looking for a comprehensive and advanced massage chair with zero-gravity recline and heat therapy. It is also suitable for people who have moderate to high budgets and enough space in their homes or offices.
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Snailax shiatsu Neck & Back Massager
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This massage chair is another great option for a full-body massage with zero-gravity recline, air compression, heat therapy, and four pre-programmed modes. It also has a computerized body scan, a three-stage foot massage, and a spinal decompression feature. It is available in two colors: charcoal and chocolate.
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Reddit users who have tried this massage chair have complimented its comfort, quality, and performance. They have also reported that it helps with pain relief, relaxation, and blood circulation. Some of the drawbacks that they have mentioned are its weight, size, and customer service.
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This massage chair is suitable for people who are looking for a full-body massage chair with zero-gravity recline and heat therapy. It is also suitable for people who have moderate to high budgets and enough space in their homes or offices.
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Human Touch WholeBody 7.1
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This portable and foldable massage chair is a great option for those who are looking for a relaxing massage without breaking the bank. It features a variety of massage modes, including shiatsu, kneading, tapping, and rolling, as well as heat therapy. The chair is also adjustable to fit different body types and can be used on any chair, sofa, bed, or car seat.

My upstairs temperature varies wildly throughout the day and differently based on how hot it is outside.
I currently have the vents downstairs either closed or partially open.
Vent in my spare bedroom upstairs is closed because I don't use that room And the door is pulled to but not completely closed.
Vent in upstairs bath is half open and vent in bedroom I use is fully open with a desk fan in the floor in front of it to help boost the flow.
I'm mostly downstairs during the day and have been keeping the thermostat at 73.
I like the bedroom cool at night so I turn down the thermostat to 70 and with the fan the upstairs will cool down nicely when the A/C is active. But when it shuts off when the downstairs temp cools, it can get stuffy upstairs and it's quite cold downstairs in the morning.
Any suggestions?
I have a thermometer upstairs so I'm willing to experiment if anyone has ideas for how to do so.
Also, should I keep fan on to circulate the air continuously.
Also, FYI, my apartment manager says to keep the thermostat a steady temp because otherwise it makes the ac unit work harder to catch up.
Also, I work from home most days, so I'm not turning it up for eight hours a day while I'm gone or anything like that.
TIA.

Hello, Thanks for your help, hvacadvice!
I am having issues with my admittedly very old compressor (70s?) but wanted to process here to see what is or isn't normal.
There are certain days when it's in the upper 80sF or so outside, and my HVAC closet gets very warm inside. My HVAC closet is completely indoors in the middle of my unit, not outside on a balcony or anything. The heat in the room seems to coming from the water lines to my HVAC unit where the chilled water from the apartment building's cooling tower is supposed to be coming from.
The water lines are hot to the touch and truly radiate heat. Is this normal? (Shouldn't the water from the cooling tower be...cooler?) I can't tell if it's above the 90°F number I keep reading about that shuts off compressors, but the metal pipes being hot to the touch suggest to me that it is pretty warm. For reference, the ambient temperature of my apartment according to the thermostat is usually around 79°F.
I turn on my AC pretty sparingly, but usually the times I want to turn it on coincide with the times the water intake lines are feeling hot to the touch and radiating heat. I have noticed my compressor shuts off when the water coming in is too hot. But when the water lines (at least from external touch) are a lower temperature again, the compressor works just fine.
Case in point: yesterday outside temps were around 85°. Apartment was getting hot. Checked HVAC closet, pipes were very warm to the touch. Tried to turn on AC cooling, compressor kept shutting off. Overnight, temperatures dropped to the 50s F. This morning it's around 60°, checked the pipes and they are normal temperature (lukewarm) to the touch, HVAC is running as happily as can be all morning.
So yes, I am absolutely planning to replace my whole HVAC unit with a brand new one. No doubt the compressor is very old and way past its prime.
My concern is: is there also a potential problem with my building's cooling tower functioning? Or maybe a water flow issue with my part of the loop for the chilled water? Or is it normal that sometimes the cooling tower water will simply just be pretty hot but a new compressor could handle it?
Thank you! I don't want to switch out all new HVAC equipment only to have it damaged or stymied by a system issue.

The Order of Prince Yaroslav the Wise, fifth class, is the highest rank a Ukrainian foreign national can achieve. Its newest inductee is back home in Florida and has been in the shower so long he’s lost track of time. His feel for the present moment will return in about thirty seconds when the hot water runs out. His hair has been both shampooed and conditioned. His body throughly soaped. It’s the shower’s warm solitude he cannot leave. There is plenty to do today; an interview at a radio station at eleven, lunch with his sponsor, an early dinner at his mom’s pastor’s. All of them want to know more about his experience overseas, they want to know how the war is progressing, they want to hear how he went from Highland Hills High School to war hero. What they don’t want to hear, what David does not want to hear, is how cold his new found notoriety makes him feel. Before can explore his melancholy any further, the hot water goes. The steam rising above the shower clears as a lukewarm solution rinses the remaining soap and warmth off David’s body. He remembers taking similarly cold showers in Ukraine, and how happy he was to have them. It’s shocking how clean a man can get with a half full bucket of water and a couple of towels.
“Ah look at Abie! Clean enough for a Russian bitch.” says Bone in his thick provincial accent. Words David can’t remember Bone actually saying or they only sound like something he would say. Sitting around waiting for mechanics, waiting on orders, waiting on food, waiting on the Russians to start shooting, David didn’t know war could be so boring. The only thing Bone said he liked more than killing Russians was fucking them. The rest of the guys in the platoon knew Bone was probably lying, but he was their instructor, and they were the international volunteers, so he was never questioned. He was the only person in their platoon who spoke Russian and Ukrainian and English. One guy, this kid from Belgium, called Bone a cunt after failing to pull the pen on a grenade during a training exercise, and Bone gave it to him.
“What is this? You do not have to pull pens in Belgium? Or do you like to give your enemies the grenade so they can throw it back?” said Bone. He then effeminately ran around the kid saying, “Here Mr. German. Take my grenade. They are loud and I am afraid.” Bone comes back to his real voice. “Killing Russians is no different than driving a truck. It is your job. Don’t think. Don’t be like this Belgian. Pull the pin. Kill Russians.” The Belgian kid said something to Bone but no one knew what it was because no one spoke French. This didn’t stop Bone from hitting him in the face so hard it broke his nose. The kid quit later that day, and Bone got written up which David told him is like a kid being put in timeout during a house invasion.
“What is this time out?” Bone asked.
The water is cold so David gets out. In the kitchen his mother goes over the day’s itinerary again, just to be thorough she adds.
“Do you know where you are going David? No, sorry. Do you know where you are going Abie?” she asks as David grabs a breakfast banana.
“Yes ma’am.”
“You know parking can be difficult downtown. Be sure to take quarters for the meter.”
“Yes ma’am.”
“And be sure to be yourself. I hope they are nice to you. You know how the media likes to spin things these days. I don’t think they are too liberal but don’t let them put words in your mouth. If they ask you something you don’t want to answer, you just say ‘No comment'. You just tell your story. You are a hero. And then you’ll meet with Fred, and then dinner at Pastor's. Be there at four. If it’s ok with you I’m going to bring the medal. Pastor will want to see it. He’s a big fan of Zelensky.”
“Yes ma’am.”
“Ok. Enough doting. That’s all you’re getting out to me today. Are you excited? Isn’t this exciting? News Radio 950 is doing a story about you. They want to hear about their local war hero…and that’s you. Give me a hug and get going before you are late.”
“Yes ma’am.”
In his car, David listens to Domination by Pantera at full volume. The heavy riffs, screaming and terrifying drums raise his spirit. Bone used to play it all the time. David hasn’t prepared anything for save his memory of his time in Ukraine. Perhaps Bone is giving an interview somewhere? You didn’t do anything wrong, he tells himself as he opens the station’s door. Inside he finds an attractive, young woman named Sara who has been emailing him for the past several weeks.
“Nice to officially meet. Right this way.”
David does his best not to stare at her as she leads him through corridor of offices and hallways.
“She looks nice. Go into an office with her.” says Bone.
“We’ve all been looking forward to having a more in-depth conversation with you. Our programming producer, who is also named David, will be asking you most of the questions. But I begged him to let me ask some too, so you might say I will also be interviewing you. I hope that’s ok?”
Sara’s blonde hair folds into a neat part on the left side of her head. David pictures her styling it in her bathroom, in a bathrobe. It’s been a while since he has smelled perfume. He found a bottle in an abandoned apartment in Zaporizhzhia and kept it. It had some Chinese lettering he couldn’t read, but it smelt nice. Some of the guys teased him when they found it saying he was going to attract Russian because he smelt like an Asian. Sara’s perfume smells expensive and French. She introduces him to David the producer and the three of them find three seats on the end of a conference room table. Sara sits on the same side as David. After introductions, David starts the interview by saying even though he is not sure exactly when the piece will air, he is certain it will before the end of the month. He then adds something about how David is a hero for doing what he did.
“So tell us how you found yourself in Ukraine?”
“Well it was pretty easy really. I went online and volunteered for the IVB, that was the name of my unit, the International Volunteer Brigade. I don’t think I talked to a real person until I booked my flight to Poland. It was mostly just forms I was filling out online. So yeah it was pretty easy. So I landed in Krakow and my recruiter picked me up. I stayed in a hotel for a few days while we waited on a couple more guys to show up. One was from Spain, another from Portugal. The Portuguese guy never showed, or if he did he didn’t come with us. I guess he could have volunteered with another outfit. I guess that’s the thing about the war I didn’t really expect. We were always just kinda losing people. And I don’t mean they were killed, although a lot of them were. I mean guys would just be with you one minute and gone the next. And then you’d find them a week later and I go, ‘Where have you been?’ ‘Oh I’ve been in Dnipro’ or ‘Oh I got picked up by the Regs.’ It was crazy. The only place where that didn’t happen was the front.”
“Who do you mean by ‘the Regs?’” asks David.
“The regular army. The Ukrainians. The good guys we were there to help. Sometimes they would be short a man so they’d just nab one of the volunteers. That was a bad gig. The Ukrainians wanted their most motivated guys fighting in the worst places. I only had to do it a couple of times, but…it was not something I did and wanted to do again. ”
David rubs his hand over his arm. He can’t smell the hot blonde anymore, only trench dirt and gun oil. The soil of Donetsk had a deep brown color to it he always enjoyed. Even with snipers supposedly in the area, digging was one of his favorite jobs. The earth smelled vibrant, full of worms and nitrogen and reminded him of his granddad, coming in from a day of field work, his jeans and boots caked in a rich layer of his land.
“So tell us what is it like being a hometown celebrity?” asks Sara. “You’re from here so people already know you, but what’s it like now? I mean now, gosh, everyone i know has been talking about this kid from Highland who won a medal from Zelensky. Did you get to bring it by the way? You were on the national news. It was NBC, but still…”
A bouquet of scents and questions. David looks across the room and sees Bone sitting with a heavy slouch in a chair at the other end of the conference table. He looks rough; still alive but not by much. He sits holding his side, his chin on his chest.
“It’s neat I guess. I walk down the street and people call my name. I take lots of pictures with people. Everyone is really nice. I felt like I was kinda a wallflower before.It’s something I think lots of people think about experiencing. I know I did, I just never thought it would be for this.”
“What did you want to be when you were a boy?” asks Sara.
“I don’t know. The normal stuff; doctor, fireman, my Dad was in sales, so not that. I think about it a lot. I think mostly I just wanted to be good. I didn’t like getting into trouble.”
“Oh my gosh, I was the exact same.” says Sara. Then durning her boss she adds “David, I don’t know if you knew this about me and this David, but we actually went to Highland High at the same time. I was a senior when you would have been a freshman, but I swear I remember you. I thought you were cute.”
“Don’t be trying to steal my assistant Dave. Can I call you Dave?”
“David’s fine.”
Bone perks up and tells them to call him Abie
“Ok so let’s get back on track. You’re over there, you’re fighting Russians, you’re helping the Ukrainians, can you tell us, what was that like?”
“What is war like?”
“Yeah the war, but you’re doing a good thing. You volunteered to help an oppressed people, to fight against tyranny, something I think our listeners think our government should have done a long time ago. But while our President sits on his ass, you bravely go do the thing that needs be done. God it must have been exhilarating, but I don’t know, I don’t want to put words in your mouth.”
Bone lays his head back on the desk and says something David can’t quite make out but thinks he knows what his commander is saying.
“Meta.”
“What?” asks David.
“It’s a Ukrainian word I learned while over there. It means purpose, but more than just doing a job, it’s your calling. It’s a word the priests with the beards use a lot. Everyday I knew exactly what was expected of me and what I could expect from everyone around me. I had clarity for the first time in my life. I felt like I could see for miles in every direction, like sitting on the roof watching all the cars going by.”
Bone stands up out of his chair and walks out of the office.
“Even when I was scared I knew that was to be expected. And when I was tired, I knew that too was to be expected. And when I was hungry, and wet, and cold, and angry enough to kill. I knew that too was to be expected because war is a cauldron. Everything gets boiled into a singularity. It’s terrifying but also pretty damn motivating. What sucks is that I can already feel everything starting to get cloudy again.”
Leaning his belly against the table, David leans in to ask his next question as if he does not want to be heard.
“Did you, you know…and this will be off the record…did you kill anyone else?”
Sara places her empty hand on the table, an offering for David to hold should his answer prove too much. But David knows the answer is not too much for his has thought of little else.
“Nope. Just the one.”
After another few minutes of hearing how brave he has been, how proud his family must be and how grateful the station is to have him come in, the interview is over. The producer shakes David’s hand and Sara walks him out. She mentions that friends of her’s are going to a new bar in the Depot and suggests David should come too. He says he can come but it will be late because he has dinner plans. “That’s ok. I’ll be there pretty late.”
—————————
Only a few blocks from the radio station, David pulls into a Waffle House parking lot. There is condensation on the windows of the building and cigarette butts near the door. Nothing here breathes well, David notes. Inside he finds his old sponsor sitting at booth by himself. David sees Fred before Fred sees him and for a moment considers leaving. However, he sees Bone sits in the corner of the restaurant, smiling and looking to flirt with a chubby waitress with grown sons.
“How the hell are you Abie?” says Fred. No turning back now.
“Sober for today.”
“Me too.”
The pair order eggs, toast and bacon. The cook makes each of them a waffle on the house after recognizing David. He finishes his plate before Fred can finish a piece of toast. Meals happen quick on the battlefield and David can’t seem to slow himself down long to enjoy his food. Bone is no longer in the corner. David sees him moving around the room; following an old lady into the restroom. He comes out with a grotesque look on his face. “That little woman took the biggest shit I’ve ever seen! Abie, come and look at it. It won’t flush. Call in a drone strike. We are going to have to pull back!”
“So” says Fred, “Mr. War Hero, how are you really? You’ve got recognition, a war recommendation, you’re doing interviews, you still got your sobriety. Life seems to be going well, but…”
“How I am really?” When he was in NA Fred could always sniff out if he was high. As his sponsor that was his job, but David never liked it. I know you say you’re fine, but how are your really. Effective, but crude. Fred taps his finger to the tip of his nose. Bingo kid. David looks around the room for Bone but doesn’t find him.
“I’m good man. Things are going well. Everyone always asks me how I’m doing, but I’m really fine. I honestly don’t feel much different than when I left. Same shit different day you know? Girls come up to me now, so that’s different I guess. So…yeah…things are good. Still sober. No real temptation to go back down that road. Been working the Steps since I got back. Doing the work. I didn’t even think about getting high when I was over there. I’m serious. Not once. I’ve got a therapist that I’m seeing. She’s really smart. And I get to see her for free. It’s part of some rehabilitation program from the federal government. I’m moving out of my Mom’s soon. I found an apartment through the church she goes to. There is a guy there who owns a bunch of places and he hooked me up with a really nice place for really cheap. He gave us a really good deal on it. The same guy said I could come work for him too when I felt I was ready. He has a real estate business and said he is always looking for new realtors. With my story, he told me, he thinks I could to really well.”
Bone sits in the booth next to Fred. His face his clean, empty. Without blinking, moving or saying anything he stares at David; human mirror he is unsure is alive or dead, in a Waffle House in Florida or an expensive dirty tank in Ukraine.
“But then I think, do I really wanna use my story to sell real estate? Some douchebag buys an apartment I’m selling him because I killed a Russian general. That’s not why I went over there. And who would even ask me to that? They don’t know what it was like. They make it seem like going over there was no big deal, that killing generals is something that happens all the time, or that the war is going well. Really man, I got so lucky with that shot. I’ve had trained snipers tell me they probably couldn’t hit a target at that range. But I did. I did that and I know I could never do it again. Even if I could, I don’t know if I’d want to. I didn’t know that guy. I mean I now know a bunch of stuff about him, but it’s only what I’ve been told. They told me that he supported Putin from the beginning and that a lot of the war planning was his idea. Ok. If you say so Bone. But I looked this guy up, he has a wikipedia page, and a wife, and kids, probably grandkids. I don’t know if his family is proud of him or not, but I know they will never see him again. And then just the charade of it all. So I got to meet the Ukrainian War Minister, Zelensky’s right hand man. Still not worth it. There’s just nothing noble or romantic about it. It’s all just a cold, black hole that runs on death and killing and for some reason you have to look at it…at least I do. I suppose I thought at some point I would see something. Never did though.”
Bone breaks his stare and cracks a smile.
“And for who, for what Fred? What is going to happen when all of this is over other than the same thing that happens after every war. A cabal of erudite assholes are going to meet in an overly secure room in the Netherlands and draw a new line in between Ukraine and Russia which is exactly what those same assholes did seventy years ago, and seventy years before that, and in seventy years we’ll do the same thing all over again. Wash, rinse and repeat. That line makes about as much sense as the first day of Spring. Sure, there is an official first day of Spring, March 20th or whatever, but we all know that there was some really warm days before the 20th and there is going to be some real cold days afterwards. But the 20th is the official day. It doesn’t make Spring happen. It just kinda helps sense out of a blurry situation. It wasn’t two days after getting there I realized the whole thing is so complicated. Half the regs were guys who had either lived in Russia at some point, gone to school there mostly, or had family living there. It felt like trying to break up a fight at a family reunion, only everyone is holding ARs as they argue about whether or not the 20th is the first day of Spring. The conflict goes back so far you can’t make out the start. And the profiteering my god, that’s what really gets me. Just like that asshole who wants to use the war to sell real estate, all the arms manufacturers who are pouring guns and bullets and tanks into Ukraine, propping this war machine so they can win another government contract. It’s sick. The people running those companies have the first available seat in hell. And Putin too. He started this whole mess. First him, then a nice row of CEOs and shareholders, that’s who I want to in hell. And there is never talk of any alternative. None. Not even a whisper. Just two sides trying to exhaust the other for a better seat at the bargaining table.”
Bone gets up to leave, but not before stretching his back, revealing a large, dark red stain in his uniform, just above his waist line.
“So here I am in all my hometown glory.” says David, “The renown Prince of the Order of the Ukrainian Shit-Show.”
There is a wet spot on David’s pants which he is not sure how it got there. He looks at Bone who is already out the door and running down the street. It’s ok, David thinks to himself, I know where he is going. ———————————————— At the 7-11 next to Waffle House David buys two tall boys and two shots of Jack. He pours the whiskey into the cans and kills the second one as he pulls into Pastor’s driveway where several Mercedes, Teslas and BMWs are parked. David clears his throat, spits into the bushes and unwraps a stick of gum. He enters the house after two hard knocks.
“Oh I think that is him.” David hears his mom say after shutting the large, dark front door. She comes around the corner of the corridor to tell him he is late and to take his shoes off.
“But my socks don’t match.”
“Well take those off too! Pastor just put down new carpet.”
“Ah well, since there is new carpet involved. Let’s not walk on the new carpet.”
The rest of the dinner party comes around the corridor in their socks. Each of them personally thanks David for coming and for his service. The men shake his hand. The women all give him hugs. By the end of introductions David has met two bankers, two retirees, and handful of housewives, as well as two more pastors and their wives. Bone is the last to shake his hand. He tells Abie he smells like old lady perfume. Elenor, Pastor’s wife, takes David’s arm, sliding her’s underneath his, leading him into their recently renovated kitchen. The rest of the group follows.
“Well dinner is almost ready. As we wait, why don’t you tell us about Ukraine.”
“Leave him alone Ellie,” says Pastor, “maybe he’s tired of talking about it.”
“I don’t mind.” says Abie. “I don’t mind telling people about blowing some Russian guy’s head off.”
“David Absalom!”
“It’s ok Mom. Yeah so I saw this column of tanks approaching our trench, which ran parallel to this road running west outta Horlivka. I don’t think they knew it was there, or if they did know, they sure as shit didn’t know we were in it, which was weird because we’d been trading fire with them all day. We were all scared shitless. It was only me and Jizzy and Bone. Right Bone? Oh yeah, it wasn’t Jizz it was that kid from Croatia. The one who fucking just ran off one day. I don’t remember his name. Anyways, Bone tells us to all be real still, play like we are dead. So this entire tank column passes by us. Takes for fucking ever. Couldn’t have been more than an hour, but it felt like ten. Finally it starts to let up you know, the last tank passes. So Bone takes the radio and tries to find a spot to call it in. As he is doing that I see the last tank, which was what Bone, about four hundred yards from us? Anyway, he comes to a stop, and out pops the unluckiest son of bitch in the whole war. The General gets out to take a piss, I take aim, figuring I’ll just scare him. And yeah. Bam. Headshot. He didn’t feel a thing; killed him with his dick in his hand. Speaking of which…if you will excuse me.”
“The bathroom is back down the hallway, first door on your left.” says Pastor.
“Is it a full bath?” ask Abie.
“Three-quarter.”
“Close enough.”
No one looks him in the eye, no one except Bone and Pastor. The bathroom has been redone in the same tile as the kitchen. David takes off his clothes, turns the steel knob in the shower to red, sits one floor and waits for the water to get warm.