Hotels with smoking rooms near me

I’m kinda ashamed I’m even posting about this publicly but I don’t want to talk about it to any of my friends so here we go My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year. This relationship also has a lot of good aspects but something that really bothers me is how bad this relationship makes me feel when it comes to other girls. Here are a few examples: He bought a puppy and couldn’t keep him, so he gifted him to his ex when they were still together, that means that they’re obviously still in contact but she still loves him and sometimes calls him on facetime for no reason. He has another female friend and sometimes when he’s over at my place and they talk on the phone for an hour straight while I just sit there and he calls her nicknames like baby. She’s in our friend group and I know for sure there’s nothing going on between them, one time he asked me if it made me uncomfortable, I said yes, he immediately stopped, but the fact this happened in the first place makes me feel very disrespected. Another friend got married, she sent him pictures of the wedding and he responded with “you’re the most beautiful bride” and that made me feel so extremely shitty for some reason. He also comments on nearly every woman he sees and rates her looks and what he likes about her, what he finds attractive/doesn’t find attractive and on one hand it doesn’t really bother me and I’m glad he feels comfortable sharing his thoughts but on the other hand a part of me thinks “why can’t you just be happy with what you have” , “why do you even think like that”. I get a lot of male attention and that bothers him a lot to the point where I had to quit my side job as a server because he noticed men would ask for my number a lot which is why I find this behaviour kinda paradoxical He doesn’t hide any of this, he just thinks I’m overreacting but is willing to change a few of these things but I still don’t know what to do because now I just feel like a mess. I think it’s the combination of these situations that makes me feel like this. He often tells me he feels like he’s walking on eggshells with me because everything he says seems to be wrong but I’m at a point where I can’t even tell what’s normal behaviour and what isn’t. I cant tell if I’m just too insecure for this relationship, if it’s just my ego, or if I’m really being disrespected that much. How do I deal with this problem?

Check my profile for the photo (which was taken a year ago btw)
I have blush pink lips naturally, but a few years ago (maybe 2? 3?) I noticed that there was a brown teardrop freckle on my lips and also across my entire lower lip there was brown patches.
I don't smoke and I don't have any mineral/vitamin deficiencies that I know of.
I've been going out a lot this summer and it's getting darker. During the winter it was starting to fade but now it's so much worse!!
People always look at it when I talk and it's making me insecure. I don't know what to do.
I want to start using hydroquinone, but ive heard it can be dangerous. However, I'll do anything at this point. I don't want to start uni with this.

38M. I went in for a physical in February 2022 and the dr was concerned that my blood work showed high ALT and AST levels. But I had just recovered from Covid back in January and had the stomach flu the weekend before my physical so he thought it was related but wanted to be sure. It was a brutal few weeks. He sent me to a gastro and they retested me a couple weeks and my numbers were back to normal. Explained away as likely reaction from Covid and the stomach flu. Fast forward to June and I had a follow up with my gastro. I started experiencing some pains in my upper right quadrant, fatigue, etc. They sent me for an abdominal ultrasound and a hida scan. US was normal. Hida scan showed my gallbladder had 21% ejection fraction. Gallbladder was removed in September. A lot of my symptoms started to go away after a month or so. Later in November I had a super stressful situation at work and I started feeling burning pain in my left side near my ribs. Gas, bloating, reflux. I noticed it got worse when I had to deal with the stress. I went back to my gastro and they gave me pantoprozle 40mg and scheduled an x-ray of my abdomen in December. X-ray was normal so they scheduled a endoscopy which I had to wait until April to get. Panto seemed to help some but I had issues with the side effects. Stool changes, anxiety, joint pain. I stopped after 30days. The pain seemed to be reduced and even go away most days but I started having more reflux and heart palpitations/fluttering. So I went chasing all of that down because I have had issues with my heart in the past. Cardiologist tested me and said it was likely gastro related. That was in March. I finally had my endoscopy done in April and confirmed that I had mild chronic gastritis and negative for h.pylori. Recommended continuing medication and diet changes. Disclaimer: I haven’t made any dietary changes up to that point. Just eating and drinking like I normally do. I drink too many caffeinated sodas which I know is bad for gastritis. I’ve been working on cutting back on that to the point. My concern lately is that I’ve been getting fatigued more during the day and recently I’ve developed a new pain in my RUQ/right rib area. My gastro was concerned and sent me to get a CT with contrast last week and I am hoping to get the results back tomorrow. She also put me on 40mg of omaprazole. Ive also started adjusting my diet. The pain seems a little bit better. Meanwhile I have been having anxiety attacks about it being something more than gastritis like cancer. I have health-related anxiety. I am a 38M in good shape. Not overweight. Just curious if someone has had similar issues with gastritis. Could it be gastritis along with bile reflux? The right side pain showed up during the memorial holiday weekend so it’s possible I over indulged on food and beverage causing a flare. The stress and anxiety isn’t helping I know.

I never thought I would have any withdrawals at all. I only took one 5g dose once a day for 3 years.
As soon as I stopped, I kept getting hit with anxiety and heart palpitations. Couldn’t even smoke a little bit of weed without my heart going crazy. Couldn’t have any nicotine or caffeine or even too much sugar.
Every morning I was woken up at 6am by a tinge of anxiety and could not fall back asleep.
Literally 44 days of this with no sign of any improvement. Then, this past Friday, I smoked weed for the first time in weeks, and it made me feel relaxed and happy. No anxiety or heart pounding. Woke up this morning around 6 but closed my eyes and went right back to sleep and woke up at 8! For WEEKS I was only able to sleep in 10 minute increments after waking up at 6am (which, dear god, Inwould have 12 vivid dreams every morning that were incredibly bizarre)
I’m finally getting back to my normal self. I was legitimately worried for a moment there that I’d never be the same again. This shit REALLY messes up your brain chemistry and makes you feel like you’ve broken yourself forever.
For anyone else struggeling with no improvement, just keep going! I’m normally a very positive guy but PAWS had me groaning “my life is awful now, I’m miserable, I’ll never go back to normal” to myself EVERY DAY.
What got me through was this sub, and users here assuring me that everything I was feeling was temporary. It’s the same for you. There are no permanant withdrawal symptoms. They can last up to two years at most but they WILL go away.

So this jackdaw made a nest in my chimney, and the mother has been somewhat territorial towards me. I sleep in the attic and often poke my head out the windows on the roof, often just to enjoy the view of the city or to smoke some cbd. A few times the mother has swooped at me when I do this, and other times it’s perched itself close to me and cawed at me very aggressively.
Today, I went to hang laundry outside and I find a very dead baby bird on the ground, I don’t think it’s been dead very long because it doesn’t look very decayed yet, but it’s covered in flies so I think it’s definitely dead. I’m assuming it’s one of the jackdaw’s babies. I got close to take a few pictures to send my family (who are away on holiday atm) and then sat in the garden for a bit on my phone. If the mother saw me during this time, is there any chance it thinks I’m responsible for the baby’s death? I don’t want to feud with a bird that’s probably smarter than me, so I’m hoping it maybe killed the baby itself, or is at least smart enough to know I didn’t do it.
Also is there anything I can do about it? Should I put it in the bin or just leave it there for nature to consume? I’m scared to go near it in case the mum comes after me

I've been quit for 1 year and 11 months. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I smoked for 20+ years, everyday, all day. Grams turned to ounces and then turned to cartridges until I just couldn't take it anymore. The anxiety and paranoia were eating away at my soul. Almost daily panic attacks. Couldn't work in my garden the way I love to do because I was thinking my neighbors were watching me and poking fun. Couldn't go for a walk for the same reason. Couldn't speak properly in public spaces. Couldn't concentrate long enough to finish damn near anything. The realization that what I thought was assisting and helping my depressive condition was just another cause for it. It made the anxiety and depressive spells so much worse. Suicidal ideation was a daily reminder that I was a pot head with no hope.
Then I quit...
It hasn't been all sunshine and roses. No rainbows with a pot of gold. Everything just started to weigh less. The burden that I had kept with me for so long was finally gone. The depression and anxiety after a "short" time decreased by 75% at the least. I no longer feel weighed down. I no longer feel like the world is watching me fail. My relationships with my family, my wife, my kids have all grown exponentially better. I no longer have to hide away my use. Afraid my children will grow up one day to know their father was a pot head that never got ahead in his life. Or worse, they would think that it was an okay position to be in for themselves.
Of course all of the things that I was smoking to forget were all there when I stopped. The trauma. The feeling of worthlessness. The boredom. But by not smoking these mountains were much easier to climb.
You too can do this. Let yourself live. Tying yourself to the crutch of daily use is only postponing the work. Put in the work. Get better. Stay better. You can do this.

All my life I was raised by people who avoid their responsabilities.
Two weeks ago, my beautiful baby dog died abruptly she was only 7. I usually go away one week per month to another city for work (and to maintain mental stability) and leave my dogs with my parents. I know they do not abuse my dogs, I leave them food, they feed them, they sleep inside, enough for one week, I try never to stay away too long. They only reason I am here is because here my dogs have space. In the city I could afford a place for me, but naturally not a house, probably a 1 bedroom and my dogs are not used to that. My dog was sick one week before but by tuesday she seemed to be recovered. Since she was young I thought it was an acute episode and she was recovered, so I went.
Saturday evening my mother called me saying she had being vomiting. Apparently my mother left after lunch and she was fine but when she came back she saw she was vomiting and called me. From the schedule, I think she first came home, cooked and calmy ate dinner, while my puppy was there suffering, but first things first! The most important is to calmy eat dinner, fuck the dying dog.
Then I asked them to take them to the hospital. I wanted her to stay overnight and would come back next day. My father did not want to because she would leave fur in his car and possibly vomit and also he wanted to rest and maybe he'd have to wait too long in the vet. Eventually they went after being on the phone for 40 minutes teaching them how to put the leash (my father knew he was procrastinating hoping he did not have to go).
During the afternoon, my father and brother were home. They probably saw my dog ill but they didn't bother to call me. If they had called me I would have booked a ticket and come home immediately. They would take her to the vet and when I was home I would be there on time to see her. Even if she died - which maybe she wouldn't because she had gone earlier - I would be there. Instead she agonized an entire afternoon and then died alone in the vet and I did not have the chance to say goodbye.
I know it's my fault as well. I will have to live with the fact that I left, that maybe I should have seen the signs, that I was not the best pet owner, I did not have the best housing situation to have pets and I did not deserver her. I know all of that. I never had problems assuming my responsabilities and guilt.
But not my parents, specially my father and brother. They are little saints who are never guilty or responsible of anything. My mother too, but at least she eventually called.
The house where they live was built by my grandparents. They were illiterate and went abroad to a country they hated to get money, stayed there for 20 years, made sacrifices and then came back and built these house. When my father got my mother pregnant of me "by accident" (poor saint is never responsible for anything it's always an accident) they let them leave here rent free. They did not pay any bills. They had free childcare (my grandmother took care of me). My grandmother cooked for everyone, my mother could get home and had everything prepared. My grandfather even opened a business so my father would have a job at home!
Then my grandmother died, my grandfather was heatbroken. He still paid everything in the house but my mother wanted to charge him money to cook for him. The business went bankrupt and my father was jobless for like 12 years. He was always bothering my grandfather to give him money. The last time I saw my grandfather in the hospital I went with my father and the last thing he said was "it's ok, the retirement check for this month already came". He was sad when my grandfather died obviously, because now he would not have anyone to care for him.
My grandfather was sick for a while but my mother did not care for him. She instead started caring for one of old neighboors because her daughters were abroad. She did not visit him in the hospital. My grandfather even pressed charges against my mother to a social worker (did not went ahead because then he died).
They never did anything in life, no sacrifices, everything handed to them, and they were never grateful. Then my grandfather died and they inherit this house they never worked for.
They can't even care for the house properly. Parts of the house are degrading because they don't clean it. They don't invest in it. They have a part they're renting to someone for an extremely low rent value because they like the guy. They could charge more and with the money do some work. nop. They put my brother's girlfriend, her mother, her two cats and the dog here, rent free. The cats had to be closed in the room all day because my dogs did not get along, but when I was not here, they made my dog sleep in an outside place we have and let the cats free, the cats ruined some of the couch and wall paper. It's fine I love cats, but it's amazing how for 30 years I lived here, my grandfather for longer (and he owned the place) and that couch was never ruined. These people come and in a matter of months ruin the couch.
Whatever. My father already said the house is going for my brother (he can't do that, by law I am always entitled to some part, but he is too stupid to know that). Once he was sick and my brother was sleeping in the same floor as him, but instead of calling my brother he phoned me. Then I called an ambulance and went to wake up my brother but my father was like "no don't wake him up, he has to wake up early" (I had to work next day but who cares).
My brother has a girlfriend and he already manifested the will of then coming live with her here, potentially eventually have their kids, stay here, rent free. I think when he brough her and her mother here he hoped eventually I would just disappear with my dogs and the mother could stay in my room and he and his girlfriend in the other and everyone would be happy.
Well, too bad. I am planning on lawering up to understand the things I have to do to assure than when they pass away I inherit my part. I do not intend to make it easy for my brother. I always worked hard and I am in a good position now in my life despite all the abuse and despite the fact they never helped me, so fuck him, he can do the same. Every centimer I am entitled to by law, I will fucking get it. And I am also planning to do a will to make sure most my money does not go for any of them if I die before.
My life may not have a lot of meaning now that my baby passed away (still have another dog, so some meaning), but I will fuck these pricks and make them pay, even if that's my only purpose. Every hour of that afternoon they let my dog in agony, they will pay for it 1000x more.

This is my second story, Any advice and suggestion to improve it will be welcome.
It was crispy and dark november night. Eric was enjoying a night walk after dinner. He was walking around on a dirt road while gazing at the stars. This always made him relaxed especially when he had a bad day. The dirt path was surrounded by trees but they were far enough to not block the sky. The most important thing about this road was that it was quiet. He have rarely seen somebody during his walks,there were no cars or speeding bikes to create disturbance in this peaceful part of the world. To avoid any distrubance he usually left his phone back at his apartment. So he could enjoy his walk peacefully without someone calling him to ruin his personal time.
While walking he saw a car parked at the edge of the dirt road. Its hood was open but there weren't any moving flashlight to indicate someone near it. He thought this was weird as people dont usually travel along this road as it ends up at a dried up pond. He decided to check it out and see if he could help in anyway.
As he approached he noticed the car was not in a good condition. The red paint was worn from many places and some of the places were rusted. He was so fixated on the car,he jumped out of his skin when he heard the voice from car.
"Help,is someone out there,please if there is anybody out there please help me." It was a woman's voice coming from the trunk of the car. Eric could not believe what he was hearing. He immediately went beside the car.
"What happend, were you kidnapped, are you hurt?" He asked the questions one after another not waiting for the reply in his panic.
"Yes, I was kidnapped. Please get me out of here. He could return at anytime. I dont know how much time has left till he returns. Just get me out of here. I dont want to die." She said hurriedly as if fearing that the kidnapper may return at any point of time.
"Calm down miss, i will try to get some help and get you out of there. Do you have any idea how long until he arrives ? " he asked trying to calm her while thinking of a way to get her out of the trunk.
"No please dont go" she said urgently " you cant leave me here alone what if he returns while you are gone, you are my only chance of getting safely out of here."
Eric cursed himeself silently for leaving his phone at home. He asked about her name while trying to figure out how to open the trunk.
"My name is Katie." She replied.
" Okay, listen katie I am going to find some thing to break the window and check if the trunk can be opened from the inside of the car. I will be right back so dont worry." He said.
" Okay,but please hurry up and get me out of here." She begged.
He walked sideways off the dirtpath and started looking for something to break the window. While looking for a rock be caught a glint of something in the moonlight. He squinted and realised he was looking at keys.
He stooped to pick the keys while thinking how lucky he would be if these were the car keys. When his hands reached the keys a thought rushed in his mind. What if all of this was a trap. He could almost feel the cold metal of the gun on his back. He was waiting for the gunshot and took a relieved breath when it didnt arrive. He hurridly walked back to the car.
He put the keys in the lock of trunk and turned the keys. He heard the resounding click. He felt immense relief as he was worried he have the wrong keys. He pulled the trunk up while saying " Lets hurry up,bef-"
These were the last words Eric uttered as a snake like tentacle emerged from the car and swolled Eric whole. The tentacle retracted back and the trunk closed automatically.
After a few minutes, a black figure emerged from the tree lines and picked up the keys put the front hood down and went inside the car and started it.
"Just a few more, and you will be as new as if you were made yesterday." He said while caressing the steering wheel.
The pathes where the paint was missing gradually started filling up and the color became slightly brighter. The crumbling leather seats started mending themselves.
The car moved and left behind a plume of smoke resembling a man.

For 6 years now I have been thinking existential thoughts ever since I had my first realization. I've realized I am not my body and that the world is more slippery then I had imagined. I want to keep this short as to why I am keeping myself from pursuing any sort of enlightenemnt, but to be short it is because I don't think I will make it.
This has been the longest 4 weeks of my life. 4 weeks ago I saw what emptiness is, I saw how there is nothing to grasp, nothing to hold onto, and I looked directly into only what I can describe as a void. I poked it more and more for a few days as I was able to trigger it by a way of non identifying with anything and looking at somthing like a table, or a room. It was frightening to say the least.
Now the reason I am struggling with this insight is I fear I may be going insane. Panic attacks have taken over me, anxiety as well.
I am thrown into what I've found to be called depersonalization and I do not want to go back. I know ots too late now knowing what I know but I feel like all I can do is salvage what I have left and try to move forward so I can continue to take care of my family, because if I don't I do not think I will be able to. I feel I am going insane.

My English is not very good, but I will try to tell a story about Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and how it has affected me. I come from a rural area, with a buzz cut and a beard. I train and work as an automotive mechanic. Most people don't think I have any issues until they get to know me better. Living with BPD is like having two divided brain hemispheres. One is intelligent and rational, while the other is a child that never grew up. In the environment where I live, emotions were never discussed or tolerated, especially for men.
I always enjoyed working with my hands, even though I understood all the subjects in high school. Many people told me that I was a "wasted potential." In high school, I tried to find myself and socialized with many people because I was like a chameleon. I could instantly change my personality, depending on who I was talking to. I started smoking marijuana, which had a negative impact on my unstable mind. I had frequent outbursts, but they were always rooted in anger because, as my psychologist said, "anger is triggered by sadness."
My family always told me that work is salvation, and I still agree with that today because it keeps you from thinking too deeply and allows you to be productive at the same time. Now, I work and have my own business, and life is better. However, for all of you who think that BPD will go away on its own or that seeing a psychiatrist will automatically change everything, rest assured that it won't unless YOU want the change and understand how to build self-confidence and self-control. Of course, a psychiatrist can assist you logically in this process, but the most important factor is your decision!
Please note that seeking help from a mental health professional is crucial if you're struggling with BPD or any mental health issue. They can provide guidance, support, and appropriate treatment options to help you on your journey to recovery. If you need help feel free to contact me.

So, like the title says I (30f) almost died of an accidental overdose a week ago. it was just a combination of meds i was already on, i just overdid it a little bit not thinking it would be near fatal.
my boyfriend (30m) happened to come to my house that evening to hangout with me and found me on my couch passed out barely breathing and called an ambulance and i went to hospital and all that. had he not stopped by, i don’t think i would be typing up this post.
i really do not know anything that transpired that evening or the next 2 days because i was so out of it. i feel awful because i know i probably traumatized him because i was laying there almost dead.
while i was in the hospital for a week, he took care of my 2 dogs and did SO much stuff around my apartment like he truly went above and beyond for me and i am so grateful for that.
his birthday is tomorrow and i really do not know what to get him! like what do you get for someone that basically saved your life, ya know?

Hello everyone Let me introduce myself Im a 27yo/M and im addicted to drugs and tobacco. Friday night i had a few beers, had me some codein and slept ok till morning. Saturday morning, i was supposed to play some soccer with a few friends. Before the game we smoked a joint and something weird happened Everything started getting bright, like really white and shit. It was 9AM, i couldn't see anything. I couldn't hear anything or anyone because there was this really pinch sound that was getting high and higher every Second.
I don't think It was the drugs because Ive been doing different type of drugs and none of them felt anything remotely close to this. I thought i wouldn't get back from that place, since it was not getting better. I think i went there for a few minutes. Came back home, slept for like 4 hours( i can't remember How i got home) and then after watching a football game, i slept for another 14 hours. What exactly happened to me? IS this dangrrous? No more drugs, no more smoking, no more eating junk food
What exactly happened to me?

Hello,
I am looking to see if I qualify for Mensa for personal reasons. I am a teacher and read a book about gifted adults and youth and share many of the traits and problems. When I was a kid I was always the top of my class, and I went to a very selective school. I won the science fair by splitting water molecules into hydrogen and oxygen in 6th grade. I remember pouring over chemistry textbooks and being in love with redox reactions. I took Algebra 2 in 7th grade (did very well) and was valedictorian in 8th grade.
But then, around 10th grade I stopped functioning. It was major depression, physical and emotional abuse and racial trauma at the new overwhelming public high school I attended after I moved across the country. Everything became very difficult. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder ten years later, after college, after all my grades had been destroyed and I had struggled much and lost motivation. At this point in life, I thought my days of being smart were long gone and I was dumb. ( I agree with the diagnosis and have had manias and depressions.)
But then I got on medication and went to graduate school and dominated. Like, on my cardiovascular and pulmonary exam an A was a 73. I got a 92. Only one other person in the class got a score in the 90s in a class with hundreds of people. I was working 20 hours a week and running every day. I didn't feel like I was slaving at school. It felt good, like I was in a flow. I got straight As, barely remembering anything from undergrad since my brain hadn't been working then and I didn't retain everything (seriously, it didn't fully click that a protein was a string of amino acids until graduate school).
Despite my abysmal academic performance in the latter half of high school, my SAT score had been a 1470 (out of 1600). I know the score is good but not stellar, but at the time I had undiagnosed bipolar disorder and was not able to study, so I really took it cold with not that great concentration. I later became an SAT tutor and sat for the exam, again without studying just to get the job, and got a and got perfect to nearly perfect on a few practice tests. My brain felt clear, like it did when I was younger and excelling in school. When my bipolar diagnosis is stabiliized, I find it much easier to think and I feel like a smart person and get feedback from the world that I am a smart person.
For some reason, on the Mensa IQ Challenge told me I got a 105 IQ. I understand that I might not be Mensa level, I just don't believe that I'm average.
Does anyone have any insight into this?

I (18F) have a so called "bestfriend" Alex (Fake name) (16F) who's really toxic towards me. Well for the beginning she and I have always had a bad friendship. I fcked up once but then the universe got it back to me and I also apologized but that's in the past. The thing started when a new girl came into our class. Anastasia (Fake name) She hated her at first but then they became best friends. The thing is that she started to talk more with her and left me alone (which I have never done btw) She just started to ignore me but not completely. And she and her talk shit about me behind my back and then they act as if nothing had happened. They also only talk with me if they want anything. As an example this week. We had a class trip to Paris and I'm the legal guardian of Alex (idk how she talked me into that but she did) well let's say that the trip didn't go as planned. First she wanted to be with Anastasia in a room but afterwards she decided to go with me in a room because she "couldn't stand" Anastasia for some days. So that's what we did. The first evening we went out and at night me, her and another friend went to the eiffel tower and they didn't leave me out. But the second she got with Anastasia everything went downhill. We went to the Louvre and they left me alone there. Then afterwards the girl with who we went out the first day and Alex had a big fight and she started talking bad about her. Then at night we bought a pizza and I finally thought that they finally stopped being toxic. Hah. I thought. The next day we went to the centre and she was talking with Anastasia the whole time ignoring me. Then I decided to rent a scooter and I went with the other girl (the girl she fought with) but we decided to meet up somewhere. They didn't go there and I was with that girl anf her friend the whole time. (Usually there are fights between us but damn I felt great and appretiated with her) And when we found them, then they started to talk with me as if they hadn't ignored me. Time passed and we went home. She decided to go grab food (I had bought sth so I didn't mind) but then I texted her after a while. I was like: "Hey what time are u cpming back. The supermarket is open till 18:30 and I wanna grab something for the bus ride." She was like "You can go and then after I come back to the hotel we can meet up" I asked her at what time she was coming back and she said that she hasn't eaten yet. I asked what they had done anf she was like. We went for a walk and we went shopping. Then I was like: Oh. Okay thanks for inviting me. And then she had the audacity to tell me: "Wtf are u mad again?" (Keep in mind that she previously told me that they were only going to eat) and then she told me that: "I asked u if u wanted to come because we were planning on going to eat." And so on. Then she explained to me that they went out cause they didn't know what to eat and they found a street where to shop.

My parents grew up poor pero pareho silang may savior complex growing up. Always help other people di na bale na sila mawalan. Which is a good trait but i feel like sumosobra na. I think they feel good about themselves and think they’re setting a good example to me and my sister but sorry…all i’m seeing is tulong ng tulong pero walang nararating itinulong nila tapos as time passes parang wala nang gratitude na kasama pag may humihingi ng tulong sakanila. Both my parents are from the province, they’re living comfortably now pero akala ng ibang kamag anak unlimited ang pera nila. Naiirita na ako na ewan lalo na pag naoobliga na din ako magbigay ng wala sa oras. Normally i don’t have a problem with it pero minsan sasabihin “hihiram” gamit, sapatos, damit o kung ano man tapos di ko na makikita ulit.
May distant cousin pa kami na tumitira samin kasi pinag aaral ng college, free everything, all my parents ask is that she helps around the house pag wala siya classes. Di naman siya required mag deep clean we hire other people for that, wash dishes lang and walis walis, anyway most of the time ako lang naman nasa bahay at ako nagpprepare ng sarili kong food and pick up after myself. she gets her own room as well, pag nagkakasakit paid lahat ng magulang ko, may allowance para sa school, and yet wala siya ginagawa around the house, inuubos pa yung food. like may mga pagkain kaming binili na di man lang namin natikman kasi kinain na niya pala. ok lang naman kainin niya tho pero sana tirahan kami? Pati mga kapatid niya entitled, minsan bibisita dito unannounced para humingi ng pera tapos yamot pa yung muka kasi matagal sila nag antay wala pa kasi kami sa bahay.
Another thing is pag may mga makikitulog dito, ivovolunteer kwarto ko kahit may perfectly good na tv room na pwede lagyan ng kutson and may couches naman. tapos ang purpose din lang naman ng visit ay para humingi ng pera. ibobody shame pa ko nyan.
Marami pang iba pero hahaba lang kwento. Rant over.

Partner of 4 years split with me recently. we bought the tickets on one account ages ago and went halfs on all the equipment. we also still live together for the time being till i can sort myself a place of my own. we are still deciding to go together as we have a tent with separate rooms and with all the money ive spent and it being my first festival i really just need to go so i have a chance at being ok and making friends.
long story short shes seeing someone else now. a family member was supposed to give us a lift but due to shit coming up they cant do it. now the only option left is to have her new partner drive us there. im really stuck. ive been in a pit for weeks and i really think getting into a car with him will destroy me. Hes actually a really nice guy, and he hasnt actually done anything wrong. he didnt know me prior to this. but at the same time as much as the obvious choice is just dont go i really feel like i need this festival to bring somewhat of a glimmer of hope back into my life. i just wanna meet new people and have a good time, ive been waiting since i was 7 to go to download (21 now)
please someone just give some words of wisdom, whatever you please, to help me thru this all
i know its not strictly download related but i just needed somewhere to get shit off my chest. im so alone :/

Thanks to u/BlueFishcakes for the SSB universe.
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Chapter 18 - When It Rains It Pours
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- 18th of April 2024,13:10, Salem district, Sweden -
Adam finally, in the midst of what had now become a proper rainstorm, reached the outside of Vitsand. Only ten or fifteen minutes ago when Adam had driven past what he believed to be his little brother hand in hand with a shil’ it had just begun raining.
But now it had become a lot more aggressive, fairly quickly at that too, which was lucky for François that it only happened now when Adam was almost at his destination. Thinking of which, he took a right instead of going forward which would have taken him into Vitsand itself. François said he was at the beach nearby, well it was barely a beach considering how tiny it was. The beach could at most hold three families at once especially since there were really only space for three cars on the dirt parking lot there, but. Thanks to how secluded it was, whenever the family had gone there during the summer it was almost always empty and no one besides Adam's family and a couple of the locals even knew it existed.
And Adam now took the last turn he’d need to take before reaching his destination. that being onto a dirt road which went through a small patch of forest until it reached lake Mälaren and the unnamed beach François was currently waiting for Adam at.
Going slowly on the tight dirt road it didn’t take long for Adam to reach the beach and while he stopped just before the beach, on the tiny dirt parking spac, Adam could see something a little peculiar. Something that confirmed a theory he had rolling around in his brain whilst he was driving here.
And that something was a boat, a small fishing boat if Adam had to guess. That had simply been lodged into the beach, now stuck. Which had pretty much confirmed his idea that he had in fact gotten to the beach by boat. And seeing as François didn’t own a boat last time Adam heard anything, much less actually even lived in the area. It was likely stolen, now why François would steal a boat was a mystery, one Adam hoped the man himself could clear up.
Adam turned off the car, and dug out his phone out of his pocket. And just as he was about to call his older brother, there was a knock on the window. While it startled Adam a little he quickly glanced to his right where the knocking sound was emanating from and lo and behold, it was in fact his older brother, François.
After spotting him François quickly opened the red car door and sat himself in the Saab, reasonably so because the weather was fucking ridiculous. “Took you long enough” François said with a sigh, just from his voice anyone could deduce that he was pretty tired.
And another thing he realized as he looked over to his brother who was putting on his seatbelt was that he had a massive red splotch on his right thigh.
As if he had been bleeding there, he had clearly covered it with something , likely a bandage and it didn’t look like it was bleeding but Adam still found it rather concerning, reasonably so. “And what the fuck happened to you then?” He asked, the concern noticeable in his voice.
“Ah… I’ll explain but we need to get fucking going” “And we need to get going right about now because you took longer than I thought you would” François finished as he slumped down into the passenger seat. “Not really my fault but… whatever.” Was Adam’s response before he turned the car back on.
Turning the car back on the headlights lit up the darkness caused by the incredibly dark rain clouds. Adam slowly creaked his way around the tiny dirt parking lot before the car was finally facing the correct direction. Now going back the way he came from not many minutes ago at all, Adam realized he didn’t even know where François was supposed to be taken to.
“Where are you even supposed to be dropped off?” Adam asked, and to his question François, who while Adam was getting away from the parking lot had nearly fallen asleep in only a couple seconds. Jolted up at the question, hitting his knee on the glove compartment in the process. “AAH FUCK!” François all but yelled out. Holding his shaking, bloodied leg he responded after a couple seconds “Aah I mean, I don't really know honestly, I didn’t really think id have to go all the way over here”
“Would dropping you off at mom & dads place work? Also, my first concern would be you seeing a doctor, I don’t know what the fuck you’ve been up to but you clearly hurt.” Adam retorted, a little more serious than prior.
“Sure that's fine…. Also I don’t think that's necessary” His older brother responded as they finally made it out of the little forest and onto the road that would take them down to Salem, away from Vitsand. “I'm only injured in that leg and I think it's only really shrapnel and a big burn, scar, thing? I'm not really sure, I haven't had much time to diagnose what it is.”
“I… I'm not going to ask yet how that happened but are you sure you can handle that yourself without getting an infection?”
“Look, i'm trying to escape here and that would be completely thrown out the window if I went to a hospital now”
“Worst case scenario I go to one in a week, the chance of them knowing who I am then is considerably lower, still not something I want to or plan on doing but it's a last ditch choice I could take.”
“You know mom will probably force you to go to the hospital the moment she sees you like that?” Adam responded with a slight chuckle. Because it was true, to be fair any other sane person would have also done so but their mother was a little special, aggressively caring would probably be the best descriptor Adam could think of regarding his mother, she definitely had character either way.
“Yeah yeah whatever, I’ll deal with it then I've got bigger concerns” François said as Adam saw something he really hoped he wouldn’t on his way down. That being what he believed to be his little brother Andreas and a shil girl roughly the same age as him. Luckily though, They seemed to have sat themselves under a fairly large tree to wait out the storm. And, the boy, who Adam was almost entirely certain was Andreas had his head turned away from the car staring intently at the woman he was with.
However as quickly as he saw them, Adam drove past them. And François either didn’t have the energy to care or simply didn’t register that they were there. Either way, Adam was relieved as that meant he didn’t have to deal with François freaking out. Which he’d had the luck of never doing prior, sure he’d heard his parents deal with him having an episode but he never had to get involved himself. Mainly because all of his mental issues came post-invasion and they hadn’t seen each other much post-invasion. Besides the very early days of the invasion when Adam moved back into his parents house and François also lived there because he had moved there a month or so prior for work in inner-city Stockholm.
This pretty random request has been one of the few this post invasion he’d even texted or called Adam, muchless met in person. Since only a little bit after the invasion François took almost all the money he had and bought a small house with a decent amount of acreage in effectively the middle of nowhere. Meaning, since he’s moved no one’s really seen or heard much from him.
However as they were nearing Salem and there with François drop off point, Adam wanted to know what in the fuck was going on. “So, you said you’d explain…”
“Yeah about that… It's a long story but it's the least I can do I suppose….”
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- 18th of April 2024,13:20, Salem district, Sweden -
Tamarz and her pod landed on the very small, sand beach. The one the suspect who managed to flee, crashed the boat he somehow stole into. How he even managed to go under their, and hundreds of marines' noses was beyond Tamarz and how he then had time to jack a boat, drive it. Slowly mind you, out into the greater part of lake “Malaren” before the data teams even saw any irregularities via satellite was a fucking mystery to everyone including the aforementioned data teams.
Or alternatively, they know how he did it but don’t want to say how because it would prove them incompetent. Either way he had gotten extremely lucky that in the first place, no one found him in the woods, but then that no one spotted his slow limping towards the first town with access to the lake where he then spent, according to data teams, twenty whole fucking minutes getting the engine of the boat he stole to start.
Twenty whole fucking minutes, and during that entire time no one had any fucking idea where he was. And Tamarzs and her pod were still rolling around in that fucking forest trying to find the goddess damned stiff. Tamarz almost wished she didn’t have contact with the data teams, but alas deathsheads are given a lot more freedom to act as they wish and so they, more specifically the pod leader, needs to have quick ways to contact those who collect such information, aka the data teams. Sure she did have a superior but beyond that and the empress herself no one could really get their tits involved in what the fuck she decided to do.
But back to the reality of the situation, at least she could have a little piece of mind knowing the numbskull marines, being several hundred in number covering a fairly large area. Couldn’t find the literal bleeding, limping man who was probably walking for an hour straight before he got the goddess damned boat.
How no one even saw the blood trail was mind boggling. And the only ones who’d thus far even been remotely close to the whore was Tamarz and her little pod of deathsheads. Which to be fair shouldn’t be surprising given that they are you know, deathsheads. But still it irked Tamarz to no end that they still hadn’t caught him. Since it's not like he was an expert, he clearly miscalculated several things which she SHOULD have been able to take advantage of but she missed those in the moment and thus lost the advantage.
At least now they know roughly where he is, because for a little bit no one had any idea where he was. Luckily the data teams managed to get their tusks out of their asses and found him driving away on the boat. But alas, there wasn’t much point dwelling about the past and the small mistakes Tamarz made as a pod leader that made them miss their suspect entirely.
Turning the vic off, Tamarz stepped out, her three pod members following suit. As she stepped out she noticed two things immediately.
One, that it was raining, like a lot. This weather reminded her a lot of Shil itself actually, although this wouldn’t be considered a particularly rainy day back on Shil. Unlike here where this amount of rain was fairly rare from her personal experience. Also that she hadn’t even noticed the rain before stepping out was a bit concerning to herself. She’d been pretty deep in thought and concentrated on the task at hand but surely she would notice if the rain went from zero to a hundred, right?
And second was the boat in question, stranded on the tiny beach they landed on. The suspect, clearly in too much of a hurry to flee, didn't even bother trying to park it or anything; he just crashed it into the beach.
At least it was nice to know that the data teams weren’t just talking out of their ass when they said he crashed it.
One other thing she did realize as she was looking around was the lack of a strong blood trail. Which to be fair, could be because of the rain, especially since Tamarz didn’t really even know for how long the rain had been going on. But still there should be some red residue left on the ground. But there was only a faint streak of red going from the crashed boat to a tree.
And from that tree Tamarz thought she could make out a small red line going to the tiny dirt parking lot, however, if it was blood it was so diluted that she wasn’t sure. How he even made it this far without fainting was also a mystery, since at least according to the experts from prior. He shouldn’t have long at all until he either dies of blood loss or simply goes unconscious.
But deciding not to waste more time than necessary, Tamarz got her move on.
“Mejoxia, Juia, you two do a quick grid search of the small wooded area here to make sure he isn’t hiding here” “Me and Réka will quickly look through the boat to see if there’s anything of interest there”
At that, all three in unison shouted “Ma’am yes Ma’am!” the two who were going to search the woods, turning around to do so. With that Tamarz and rakiri pod mate Réka made the small walk from the parked vic to the boat the terrorist had left stranded at the beach.
The short walk up to the boat was in silence. But as they got onto the rather small boat, they saw quite a lot of things that caught their attention. First of all the blood, his blood, was everywhere. But especially around the driver's seat, where there was also a first aid kit with all of its contents strewn around the drivers seat. Secondly he had opened what Tamarz could only assume was the engine of the boat located under the helm. And there were crossed wires, literally, whilst other wires had seemingly been cut off at random. And two wires had clearly been cut, and then forced to reconnect with something humans call “silver tape”
While Tamarz really had no idea what she was looking at, this was likely how he forced the boat to start in the first place, in order to facilitate his escape. While she was looking around she noticed something, under a table that was between two small couches. There was a rifle, which Tamarz pointed to, quickly alerting Réka to the contraband.
However as she was about to go under the table to retrieve the weapon, she received a call. And the visor in her helmet immediately let her know whom was calling.
It was in fact, her contact within the data-teams, Mrs Ele'ya, Do'ro Ele'ya.
“I will make this call quick since you need to go immediately after it” Do'ro immediately began speaking as soon as Tamarz answered the call. With but a quick paus she continued.
“We have determined the suspects current position to be near the town of Salem, not more than twenty minutes by road from your current position and maybe two or three by flight”
“I’ll send you the exact coordinates but you need to move now, last he was seen by the other data team on “CCTV” footage was in a red car, they’re unsure if he’s driving the vehicle or not so you might have two armed suspects” “Move now, don’t waste time.” And before Tamarz even got a singular word in, not even a “Yes Ma’am” Do'ro turned off the call.
Well as Mrs Ele’ya said, Tamarz better get moving. While it was a little disturbing that this was all getting so close to home, this was Tamarz’s chance to redeem her own pride, and the pride of the empire from some mentally ill primitive….
[Next]

So, this happened years ago, but i just now realised how gross it is. When i was 12 years old, my 8 year old brother and i were quite close. And everyday we would sit down in the living room and watch tv. one day, we were watching tv, and he jumped onto my back and started dry humping me. I told him to get the hell off of me and punched him. This kept repeating over and over. Eventually i told my mom about it but she said its just "playing". But i dont think it was. From articles i had read, it says its experimenting with their body. But most kids use teddies, pillows, shit like that. Not their sister. It sounds strange but i also have and had severe ocd, and found it really disgusting, especially as he is my brother. Its been 4 years now, but im still not over it. What could it have been? Just harmless playing? Or what else.

Last year wasn’t fun for me. I think I ruined my guts with antibiotics back in April and I ended up feeling dizzy a lot during the year. At one point I was dizzy for a good 2 months. Doctors couldn’t tell me anything about what might be causing it. This then led me to develop health anxiety. I was fixated on any kind of sensation I felt in my body leading me to have anxiety attacks. At the end of the year my other half also put me through some shit emotionally.
I managed to overcome most of it and I have been feeling fine for the past I would say 3 months. I even stopped worrying about my health. I didn’t have any dizzy episodes and I stopped worrying about going out to places and not afraid of travelling either. (I was so scared I’d get unwell somewhere I stopped travelling for a bit.
I gave up drinking coffee 6 months ago. I used to be a heavy coffee drinker. Last week on Thursday I travelled for work and I had I really strong coffee then a strong tea and barely any food or water. Which wasn’t wise after eating and drinking clean for 6 months. By the end of the day my heart rate was high no matter what I did, I started feeling nauseous and dizzy. This was my biggest fear that I start feeling dizzy and I’m not at home. I had to go home. Since Thursday I feel unwell in waves. Suddenly out of nowhere my heart rate raises, I lose my appetite, I become irritated and my thought are racing. I also didn’t have an easy week at work. There’s a colleague who started hating on me, mocking me online, making my job really difficult and just generally shit talk about me to others at work. Which doesn’t feel nice as I worked nearly a decade at this company and I built up a really good career and people respect me. This colleague’s behaviour really put me down, on Friday I left work early because 1. I was exhausted from the coffee experience from the day before 2. I heard what else she said about me. I have been waking up the last few days just thinking about the whole situation at work so I always start my day with these negative thoughts. Friday night I didn’t sleep well. At one point I woke up to feeling really uneasy and my heart racing. In the morning I had to wake up early and I had to drive 2 hours to go somewhere. This was my first time ever driving so long (driving anxiety) I was ok during the drive and even after.
Anyway since that I just feel not good and it comes in waves. This morning I finally had breakfast and I enjoyed it. But then I was chatting with my parents and by the end of the chat I started feeling weird again. I’ve been laying in the sofa ever since. I have times I feel ok and enjoy things again then next minute I don’t enjoy anything because I feel like I’m dying. I can’t even describe how I’m feeling. I just know my heart rate is higher than usual when I feel like this, and I feel irritated by anything, I feel sick thinking about food.
Not sure what to do or what would help me. Could the sudden caffeine intake plus the stress from work cause this?
Is this anxiety at all?