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2023.06.04 17:13 AlexRD19 NLMB Fallen Members Part 6/The War With PocketTown

NLMB Fallen Members Part 6/The War With PocketTown
2019 was a hard year for NLMB, losing members back to back to different opps and starting a new bloody war with DeathRow, in 2020 the war will slow down due to a lot of factors. Most members who put in work in that war will get locked up and NLMB will focus on other opps just like DeathRow, we will come back in the summer of 2022 to that beef.

Willie "Ghost 🕊️" Coker

I didn't had space to include Ghost in the last part so i decided to do it here, it's not that important to the NLMB/DeathRow beef so it's ok if i include it at the beginning.
Ghost also known as Rat was a respected OG from GME, i am not sure if he was the target or not but DeathRow and Lakeside dissed him a lot, Fa Fa Fa said they killed Ghost and ever since then GME didn't do anything for him, ignore the video from the store, that's not Ghost, it's a mistake by the one who made the post, the one who died in the store was an innocent as far as i know and it happen way after Ghost died. This happen in the same month DeathRow killed Willie, DeathRow was sliding a lot in 2019.
Ghost was outside with multiple people in his own hood when shots rang out from an unknown direction, he was shot multiple times in the chest and he died at the hospital.
"Ghost got hit up" 0:58

Michael "Aero 🕊️" Portis

One of the reasons i believed Savo 🕊️ was killed by kings was Aero death, months after Savo died, Aero was sliding with FatLord 🔒 on some kings, which made sense at least during that time, Savo died in a hood cool with the kings, Aero is sliding on the kings, it was making sense into my head that Aero died trying to get revenge for Savo + that's what i was told, again i was wrong. As i said in my previous post, Savo was killed by NLMB, Aero was just a hothead who was sliding on his opps, nothing weird.
Aero was on the frontline and did a lot of dirt for DeathRow, he earned the nickname "23" for a reason, in my previous post i put a screenshot with Fa Fa Fa straight up saying Aero killed G Dottie 🕊️. I know a lot of people believed Aero killed an innocent, but people told me that Garcia 🕊️ was a known king, why would Aero and FatLord slide on some innocents and specifically target them?
Aero and FatLord were driving a turquoise SUV when they made a U-turn at the end of the street and parked in the block close to a king hood, both got out of the SUV with armed 9-mm handguns and approached Garcia and his neighbor as they were outside talking, they opened fire hitting the neighbor in the arm and hitting Garcia multiple times, Garcia returned fire with his own weapon striking Aero multiple times who died at the scene, FatLord was also shot multiple times, FatLord left Aero there and went to a hospital with the SUV in the same clothes that CPD saw on the footage. Garcia was pronounced dead at the hospital, police recovered 19 9-mm shell casings and 10 .40-caliber shell casings from the crime scene.
This is a very controversial situation because at first, people said after FatLord recovered from his wounds, he told the police what happen and also snitched on BD 🕊️ but now they saying free him, they saying that someone else ratted and not him, but according to this article, CPD is using FatLord as a source, FatLord was the one who allegedly was the driver on the Willie hit, FatLord is still locked up so who knows.
The scanner also confirms that they was sliding on some kings because they was having problems lately, it could be possible that some kings gave the location of Savo to NLMB, Savo was killed right at his home so NLMB probably got the drop from someone.
NLMB and ABK will diss Aero hard because he killed G Dottie, someone also recorded Aero on the ground, which was heavily mocked by his opps.
"Lil Aero a dumbass got hit on a hit" 0:23

Tristan "Tedo G 🕊️" Rogers

NLMB first loss in 2020 but not because of gun violence, Tedo was from the MuskegonBoyz clique, he was killed by a car in DucciWay 🔱 hood, there is not a lot to say about him, he was a respected OG who was either related to Kobe 🕊️ or close to him.

Shianne "Anna 🕊️" Reynolds

Anna was a very loved member from MTG 079 now more known as BiyoBlock, she was Biyo 🕊️ sister, at first people believed that she was not gangbanging but that's false, there is a lot of captions with her saying she was using guns to slide, i don't think she was active when she died in that life and she probably was not the target either. However, she probably was active in the past and as we all know, the past is catching up to you, her vigil was also shot, allegedly by NLMB again.
What i know is this, allegedly NLMB saw some MTG 079 members in traffic in SirconnCity 🔱 hood, they sped up behind them and shot the whole car, Anna was just unlucky since she was in the car with them, she was hit in the head and CPD pronounced her dead at the scene. This was one of the first getback NLMB got for Capo, but it will not stop here, NLMB will get more getback for Capo months later.
2020 was a hard year for MTG 079, they lost 4 members, Anna 🕊️, Pook 🕊️ who was not killed by any opps, LB 🕊️ an original who was also close to Biyo, LB was killed in DrillCity 📶🔱🅱️ hood, last one is Jeezy Snow 🕊️, we will get later to him.

Anthony "C-Note 🕊️" Smith

C-Note was an OG from NLMB, to be more specific he was from the MuskegonBoyz clique, from what i know he passed away from natural causes, nothing to do with gun violence. He was born in 1985 so he was old compared to a lot of main members from MuskegonBoyz clique like G Farro for example, you could say he was from that White Folks generation.

Junius "BoBo 🕊️" Thurston

BoBo was a very loved member from ABK, he was one of the main faces from there. BoBo was also a rapper, one of his best songs Pigs Hot where you can see a lot of ABK members including Yogi 🕊️, BoBo was close to NLMB as well, he did a song with Juvie and before his death you could see him around G Herbo.
BlackMobb was having a field day when BoBo was killed, even though BoBo left that life behind while starting a truck company, it's not like your opps will forgive you or forget that you did dirt in the streets or hurt their people, that shit is stucked until you die, even if you are 30, 40, as long as you put yourself in danger(go back to the city) you can get killed anywhere.
BoBo exit his car and went to a gas station in a relatively safe area far away from any hood, a black Audi pull up and a rear passenger open fire, he ran north from the station but then a gunman got out of the car and chased after him, firing more shots. BoBo collapsed and the gunman caught up to him standing over him and fired more shots, BoBo was pronounced dead at the hospital, police said he was shot multiple times.
BlackMobb were not the only ones having a field day with his death, PocketTown also dissed him:
"BoBo got his ass smoked, 20 bullets took his soul" 2:45
It is sad because BlackMobb and ABK were like this, but friends are turning to enemies and both sides lost main members in this war.

Lee "KTS Rio 🕊️" Cameron

If you follow the drill scene, then you know who was KTS Rio, one of the main faces from PocketTown and Lil Los 🔒 little brother, he was a huge loss for PocketTown, after his death a lot of stuff went down.
Rio was driving a vehicle with two other teenagers near a gas station in KakiWorld 🔱🅱️⭐️✊🏿 hood when a silver SUV pulled up and someone inside started shooting, Rio was shot multiple times and he was pronounced dead at the hospital. The 14-year-old boy was shot in the back and a 17-year-old boy was hit in the right arm, both were taken to the hospital in good condition.
After his death PocketTown goes by "RioGang" in his honour, Rio was also one of their main rappers, one of his most known song is NLMBK, Faro dissed him in a song after he died:
"Rio got hit and they left his ass twitching" 0:38
"Rio got hit, y'all ain't get your getback" 1:05
A lot of people are saying NLMB killed KTS Rio but if you watch Freeband BoBo 🕊️ video that CH88 made, it is very clear that NLMB didn't do anything to Rio, because the war started when Lil Greg 🕊️ was killed, that's also what BoBo said. The beef was not serious until Lil Greg died, BoBo also said the whole war started because of a bitch, Lil Greg wanted to call his guys to kill BoBo because of a girl. Feel free to watch the video, it's explaining a lot of stuff.
Remember there is a difference between "twitter beef" like disses and blood beef, KTS Dre did dirt on NLMB but he did that for Lakeside while PocketTown was his second hood(he started to claim PocketTown after KTS Von died), so Lil Greg was the first guy to die in that beef, we will get later to him.
Now honestly it is not known who killed KTS Rio, but one of the most plausible theory is that SirconnCity killed him, months after KTS Rio died, PocketTown lost KDawg 🕊️, another top member while sliding on SirconnCity hood, his article doesn't mention anything about sliding but both sides said that.
"We doing hits without hoodies and masks, Rio got hit, he got stretched like an elastic" 1:08
"KDawg got hit on a hit, he dead" 0:24
They are main opps but since PocketTown top members were sliding, i think that means something, especially after Rio died.
This won't stop at KTS Rio, this year would be the most hardest year for PocketTown, they will lose 6 members in one year and they was all top members, but not all of them were killed by opps.
Big Glizzy/Lil James 🕊️ (June 07 2020), killed at a party in Robbins, a suburb of Chicago.
KTS Rio 🕊️ (July 12 2020), KDawg 🕊️ (September 27 2020), Nuke 30 🕊️ (November 25 2020), killed OT, LA Glizzy/Lil Ant 🕊️ (January 12 2021), killed OT, Killa Spook 🕊️ (March 26 2021), we will get later to Killa Spook.
"They lost 6 niggas in one year, tryna make the rest of them disappear" 1:53

Antoine "BT 🕊️" Rose

BT was a very loved member from NLMM and 358Gang, he claimed both sets, he was also close to NLMB, one of the reasons he died. Even though NLMB and 358Gang are opps, as i said in my previous parts, NLMM was always a set focusing on money, they was never known to slide like that, so that's probably why he was close to NLMB and cool with NLMB opps, 358Gang. BT also appeared on the Maurice show.
I think everyone knows that Fa Fa Fa straight up said they killed BT, so why they killed him? Well even though BT was not involved in their beef, it doesn't matter, he was close to NLMB and 358Gang killed Mook 🕊️ in 2019, so DeathRow got their getback for him. I don't think BT was the specific target because the shooting occured in TheBush 👑🦁 territory, which are opps to DeathRow. BT was shot in the head and in the abdomen, CPD pronounced him dead at the scene, a 32 year old man was also shot in the abdomen and in the leg, he was taken to the hospital in critical condition.

Sean "Cello Da Shoota 🕊️" Wilson

There was a lot of back and forth between NoGood and NLMB, mainly because NLMB killed Montae 🕊️ and it was forever stuck there, even though NoGood and NLMB are old opps, that beef was really inactive compared to Lakeside for example, but this all changed when Montae was killed, Montae was very loved by NoGood and like Jeff Fort said "there is not going to be any killing without killing" Cello was not really a main face from NLMB, he was from the NoLimit clique but his original hood was JBG 🔱 also known as MoneGang.
Cello was driving with someone else in the car in NoGood ⭐️✊🏿 hood, Jay Savage and Deonte 🔒 fired shots and the person in the backseat fired back, hitting one of them in the forearm, Cello was hit in the neck and died at the hospital, the other person was listed in good condition after being shot in his thigh, he has a license to carry his gun. Jay Savage and Deonte were both charged with his murder, both were from NoGood and close to Montae.

Deshawn "Jeezy Snow 🕊️" Fletcher

Jeezy was in ABK 4️⃣🍸⭐️✊🏿🔱 hood driving his car when Mally 🔒 opened fire from the sunroof of a silver Chrysler 300, he was shot multiple times in the head, neck and upper torso, he died at the hospital two days later. There is a lot of contradiction of the car used in the murder, what we know for sure is that Mally shot from the sunroof. Mally also searched the murder on google to see if Jeezy died.
This was a a crazy hit for many reasons, one of them is that Lil Wet was driving the car, Lil Wet did this two months after he beat his quadruple murder case, the case is complicated but to this day Mally is still locked up for it. The full foia if you want to read more, from what i know the case is very strong against Mally but let's be real, Lil Wet beat a quadruple murder, everything is possible in Chicago, so i won't be surprised if he is beating it.
Lil Wet also hinted in his song "Nun Stop" about the hit, the music video was deleted or made private, but the audio version is still up.
"Gotta ride for my gang, Steph got the wheel, Lil Mally might come out the roof " 0:44
Jeezy was actually very close to DoggPound 🅱️, you can see him around them in old videos and i think he was related to some members from there too, i am not sure if he was claiming DoggPound at one point but members from there still say rip to him, again it doesn't mean every DoggPound member was close to him. It is a complicated situation but this was another getback NLMB got for Capo, a top member from MTG 079 and very loved.

Gregory "Lil Greg 🕊️" Jackson III

The death that started all and guess what caused this? Well if you didn't guess it, it was a bitch, Lil Greg 🕊️ got into his feelings because BoBo 🕊️ was messing with a girl that he liked so when Lil Greg saw him, he tried to get the green light from other members to come and kill him right there, allegedly NLMB told him BoBo is not an opp and that he is staying out of the way, Lil Greg tried to call other members but it was too late.
PocketTown members got the drop from BoBo and went to kill Lil Greg who was in a barbershop far away from EastSide, Lil Don 🔒 walked up to him and shot Lil Greg in the face inside the barbershop, he was pronounced dead shortly after at the hospital, CK was actually charged because they found him in the same car that was used in the murder, he stayed solid and beat the case, CK was the one driving.
Lil Greg was a very loved member from NLMB and a main face from there, he was from the MuskegonBoyz clique but very close to G Herbo and even celebrities like 21 Savage paid respects to him, he was respected because he was a trapper making money from drugs to raise his kids, his death hurt a lot of people and you could say that his death made "DrenchGang" more famous because the getback was huge in terms of impact on the media, i am of course speaking about KTS Dre, his death was international news because of the way he died + Killa Spook, we will get later to them.
"Me and Gregg was sharin' clothes, but we weren't really bros" 0:18
"Lil Greg died, that started some shit, but how many checked after broski got hit?" 0:36 he is also upping 4 fingers, which is probably a reference to Killa Spook, KTS Dre, BoBo and probably Lil Don from PaxTown.
Moowop 🔒 also confirmed 3 opps died for Lil Greg, again most likely a reference to Killa Spook, KTS Dre and BoBo. Lil Don was also shot multiple times but he survived
NLMB was hurt but the opps were dissing Lil Greg hard, especially Lil Don:
Lil Don called Lil Greg biggest score of 2021
This started a new bloody war in the EastSide which caused a lot of damage, members getting locked up, members getting killed, members getting shot and so on, PocketTown was also unlucky to get hit with a "RICO" and most of their top members got locked up, there is barely any main faces out there besides Denny G and Lil Ant, they also have internal beef now.
The indictment also mentions they found the gun which was used in Lil Greg murder, the whole situation was fucked up for PocketTown, they lost like 10 members to this indictment + Lil Don got locked up + internal beef, the whole hood was hit hard by this indictment and a lot of "snitching" rumours are in the air.
The members who got locked up are Lil Rah 🔒, EJ(he was released), Rello 🔒, Dreski 🔒 MT Larry🔒 who actually shot back when Spook died, Corey Got Clout 🔒, PacMigo 🔒, Dwight 🔒 and DreadHead Larry 🔒

Dante "Killa Spook 🕊️" Thomas

Killa Spook was like a leader in PocketTown, he had a lot of respect and his name says it all "Killa Spook" it's not a name you earn for doing nothing, he was a known killer who did a lot for PocketTown, him and KTS Von 🕊️ went to slide on Lamron in the past, he was very active, him and Denny G were sliding on SirconnCity as well.
Spook 🕊️ was partying with a lot of members inside StainCity🔱⭐️✊🏿 hood, it was a party for their fallen member KDawg 🕊️ who was killed sliding on SirconnCity in 2020, two shooters(this might be PocketTown shooting back but i personally think those are the offenders), NLMB and GME got the drop from a bitch and shot the whole party up, Killa Spook was shot by a stray bullet through a window, he was pronounced dead at the scene, Lord was shot in the head and he was taken to the hospital in critical condition, Denny G was taken to the hospital in critical condition and he recovered after some time, other members got shot as well but it was nothing serious like the ones i mentioned above.
Right after the party got shot up, PocketTown went to slide on NLMB and hit someone in the leg, there are a lot of things that points NLMB for doing this hit but it is confirmed that GME was also involved, Lil B from GME was arrested by CPD with the car used in the murder, he was released because CPD didn't had proof that he did the murder.
There are many names around Spook death, Faro, Lil Ro, Twino 🕊️, EMoe from GME, 7Moe 🕊️ from GME, it is not known exactly who killed Spook but it is hard to tell, what should be confirmed for sure is that it was a NLMB/GME hit, even CPD and FBI believes that. In case you guys don't know, FBI was trying to build a RICO but their main suspect Max 🕊️ was killed, so i think the case is really not that strong anymore. I do think FBI is monitoring what is going on between NLMB and PocketTown now.
PocketTown was hurt to the core by his death, NLMB and GME were dissing like crazy and celebrating Lil Greg a lot, it's a lot of disses that i am sure most of you saw, if you want way more details, watch CH88 video.

Londre "KTS Dre 🕊️" Sylvester

Dre was getting out of prison after his fiancee paid his $5,000 bond on Friday, for some reason Dre decided to leave only on Saturday, what Dre didn't knew is that his decision will cost him his life and potentially the life of two other innocent females. Dre was shot around 64 times by multiple shooters from two different vehicles far away from EastSide in every side of his body, a 60 year old female was shot in the knee and a 35 year old female suffered a graze to her mouth while walking by, both were taken to the hospital in good condition. Dre was DOA and his death will have a huge impact in the streets, after his death the president of America, Joe Biden, was forced to do a meeting to slow the violence in Chicago, this was because his death had an immense impact in the international news because of the way that he died.
I would leave in the comments a list of some the countries news speaking about KTS Dre, because it would take too much space in the post.
Dre was an upcoming rapper in the drill scene, his most famous song being a feature with Rio called "NLMBK Pt. 2" but in the drill scene he mostly became known for punching Kyro, one of the many reasons Kyro diss him a lot. Dre was very active in the streets before his death, he did a lot of dirt and a lot of his opps wanted him gone. Dre was also suspected by CPD for killing Magic 🕊️ in 2019. He was originally from LakeSide but he started to claim PocketTown after the death of his brother in 2015, he is what people believe Von was, don't get me wrong, Von was active in the streets but Dre was something else.
I heard many names around Dre death, Faro, the DrenchGang Twins, Moowop, Kyro, Lil Hot, honestly i am not sure who killed Dre but NLMB and even PocketTown/LakeSide made it known who did it on social media. Faro being pretty clear that this was a getback for Lil Greg.
Losing so many people in such a short time affected PocketTown in many ways, a lot of them decided to step down because when shit gets real, you need to think about your life too, most of them have families, it might be a coward way but can you blame them? 10 members locked up for indictment, 9 top members killed between 2020-2022, Denny G was almost killed, Meechie was almost killed, Lil Don got locked up, Lil Art barely survived after being shot 20 times, Lord was left in critical condition, this is the worst period for PocketTown and Lil Don also confirmed that his people are scared and he only got four guys who are willing to slide.
Sadly the ones who will suffer the most is the family, his mom was devastated that she can't even give him a proper funeral because of the way that he died.

Christopher "Gucci 🕊️" Daniels

Gucci was near the sidewalk in GhettoWorld 4️⃣🍸 hood when a vehicle passed by and someone fired shots at him, he was shot in the chest and he was pronounced dead at the hospital.
This is one month after Dre was killed, Gucci was a member from the MuskegonBoyz clique, i didn't saw PocketTown or LakeSide celebrating anything, in fact they still say "getback got no date" for Spook and Dre, it might be other opps that NLMB have, remember NLMB beefs with 30+ sets, it could also be personal beef, mistaken identity and so on.

Felder "Stro Dolla 🕊️" Tatum Jr.

Stro Dolla was with a group of people inside GottiWorld 🔱 hood when someone opened and hit him in the chest, he was pronounced dead at the hospital, a 34 year old woman was also shot in the leg, she was taken to the hospital in good condition. Again i don't think he was the target but who knows, i didn't saw any opps celebrating, Stro Dolla was claiming NLMM but he was close to NLMB.He was also close to BT 🕊️ who was killed in 2020 by DeathRow, he was also a rapper, most likely Stro Dolla was just at the wrong time, wrong place, to my knowledge GottiWorld and NLMM or NLMB don't have beef. GottiWorld are actually opps to PocketTown.
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2023.06.04 17:12 Schnikies I don't do anything.

I often feel like there's this "She can't do anything" vibe in our marriage. He says otherwise. He says he knows I'm smart.
I'm nothing like his mom. His mom, rest her soul, was always super quiet and very slow in all of her movements. She's a sweet, kind, quiet woman. I'm a loud complainer. He jokes that it's my favorite thing to do but I think he hates that about me. I've gotten angry and I have broken things before both in anger and in accident. I seem to clatter, like if I put one dish on top of another for example it will make a clattering noise. I don't know how to stop things like that! If I'm looking for something in a cupboard I'll take everything out to try and find that thing, and I probably won't put them back until after I've consumed what I found. Things like this I think have turned my husband off to letting/having/wanting/liking me to do anything, anything at all. When we were first dating, he would take me to all these crazy adventures. But they'd get to be too much and he wouldn't listen to me... I'd say "Let's turn back before it gets dark" but nope, we'd be out in the woods all night without a flashlight, trying to get back using our cell phone light, or he'd leave me out in the middle of the desert alone, while he wandered off, thinking I'm fine and that I'd just magically feel OK and know the way back. He'd also keep janky friends around that I knew were bad news long before him, I'd say "We have to just cut ties" and he'd say "no no no it'll be fine" until we have to call the police on someone and I give him a death stare and 10years of "I told you so"... All of this has lead to him never pushing me to do anything, with any one, at any time. And me saying "You have to listen to me!" about things has lead him to listen to me so much, that if I so much as clatter a dish he jumps up and tries to do it himself.
I've tried to be more slow and quiet, but he'll stand there and watch me, making me super nervous. Or he'll ask if I need help so many times that I'll be defensive and angry toward him. I've made the claim "I AM ALLOWED TO ...." about a million times now, and it will be mundane things, vacuum, wipe a counter, whatever. Sometimes while being told not to do something, I'll get determined, get into a frenzied hurry, and then I will break something. I have a window crack proving to me every day this new rule in our house of "She can't do anything" and it makes me feel bad. The story behind that, is I wanted to stop, wash the front of the car. He kept telling me no and kept driving. We were by a hose, but he wouldn't pull close enough to it, we were by a car wash but he wouldn't let me, he pulled the car away. Finally the next time we stopped I grabbed a pitcher of ice water from the fridge, tossed the water onto the front of the car and of course the heat of the car + extreme cold of the water (the only water I could get my hands on) cracked the window and serves as probably the most prominent example of "I'm not allowed to do anything" or "I'm stupid" in the whole house. It makes me feel really really depressed. Not just the crack, but all of it. How did we go from being pushed too hard to do too much (He believed we could walk the Las Vegas strip, and kept me walking for 12 hours, I complained so much about my feet hurting and ended up having to get orthopedic shoes for foot pain for years.) all the way to me being treated like a fabriche egg?
Is there no in between?
Now-a-days I don't drive, fix things, clean, cook, nada. My life has become video games and movies, and sometimes I'm very sad about it.
I'm 43 years old. When I met him I had a nice place with a swimming pool, I did step aerobics. I had lots of friends and a few cats. I went and sang karaoke. I had thousands in savings and two jobs. We bought properties together, I painted the entire inside and outside of the house and did all the yardwork. I hired people to handle certain things. I downsized relentlessly. For work I handled food, cleaned, used computers, handled money, was highly trusted,
Now we are retired together, we are travelling in an RV. It's great. He was an engineer But I don't drive, I don't move, I don't clean, I don't do projects, I don't have friends, I don't sing karaoke, I don't do aerobics. I don't swim. I don't cook. I don't anything!!! How did this happen!!! How do I fix it?
I make these attempts to do things, and they get instantly shattered. A good example is I was trying to open a ketchup bottle. I had to look in the drawer for something to help me. My husband was instantly "I can get that. Do you want help with that?" I said "no" and went into how I just don't do anything around here, how I feel stupid, how I feel like he thinks I'm stupid / incapable. I feel like I'm treated like a handicapped person mentally and physically. He says he doesn't feel that way, and he'll make an effort to try to "treat me like I'm smart" but now I've just put more stress on him...
My husband has been trying to quit smoking for years. Lately he's been popping Nicorette worse than it's candy. If he's not popping Nicorette he's sneaking cigars. He always blames me. He says I stress him out.
So there you go, I tried yesterday, to prove I could do something -anything- opened my own ketchup bottle, and stressed him out.
I asked him to please just wait 60 seconds before asking if I need help with something, and to please not just put down what he's doing and stand over me, staring if I try to do something. But then, that's putting everything on him, i.e. am I stressing him more?
I just want to start doing things. I'm doing dishes now, but he's asleep, and trying to be quiet about it. And I let these thoughts over take me while doing them, so I came on here, to let it all out... and hopefully I haven't wasted so much time.
It's like a catch 22. I want to do things, but doing things causes negative feelings, so I stop wanting to do things. I'd LOVE to get back to a point where our relationship has some excitement. Where we actually go out, see things, meet people, etc. But it kinda feels like a pipe dream. I've gotten so depressed about this concept.
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2023.06.04 17:12 skydweller82 What are your thoughts on adverts here?

Everytime im on i see adverts. They are targeting traders so as soon as we make some money we become wallets for seeking and their ridiculous fees and then simps for all the gold diggers and "pro's" out there who want gifts and payment for dates/s*x! I worked too damn hard to make my money plus im still trying to max out the number of prop firms i work with to start paying some chick thousands per month and shes not even exclusively mine! I would rather save up for my house and bentley and get women normally than pay seeking. Thats just me! How about you guys?
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2023.06.04 17:12 aquaphorbottle HELP: I have to go back home after having a week away from the chaos

I (22f) unfortunately still live with my abusive father and enabler mother because of financial constraints—I’m trying to find a second job but nothing seems to pay enough for me to find housing for myself.
My father has always been a very angry, miserable person. He’s never happy or content, he’s always simmering with anger but he’ll bottle it up and wait to release it at the most “opportune” time that he deems fit. It used to be a lot more that he would have these outbursts when I was very young. They terrified me, it usually consisted of him screaming at my mom or I (rarely my younger sister too) at the top of his lungs, horrible things whilst throwing things around, making threatening moves like as if he was going to try and hit us (although sometimes he’d tackle me to the floor or throw me into the wall if I tried getting away from his outburst). I remember, one of the worst times being when he found out I lost my virginity , he’s very religious. the other time being when I talked about wanting to k*ll myself because my mental health was declining—he decided it was best to scream at me about how horrible of a girl I am and that I should just do it already.
My birthday was about a week and a half ago and the night before my birthday, my mother and I were talking about my new pet cat that I bought and I was crying because she told me I should probably get rid of it because my dad’s dogs would disadvantaged by the cat since he’d be forced to train them to be kind to the cat (he thinks training a dog is abusive). I started crying because I was exhausted and stressed and I didn’t want to have to be told that before my birthday, my dad heard me and came down and immediately started screaming at me about “how dare” I suggest training the dogs and that I’m a horrible daughter who always shits on him and my mother (I swear I don’t, I’m always walking on eggshells and trying to hide myself from them because I’m scared of being a bad child who bothers them). I started crying harder because I hate loud noises and being screamed at but he kept cornering me and screaming horrible things at me.
Eventually I was able to get away and get in my car, I was very close to ending my life that night because I was so distraught and tired of feeling like I’m a horrible person. I went to my partner’s family’s house and I’ve been there since but I have to go home tomorrow and I’m terrified. I hate that house, I hate my father, I hate that I was born into this family, I’d rather have never existed. Someone help me, please.
TLDR: my father terrifies me and I don’t want to have to go back home with him, even though that’s my only option.
submitted by aquaphorbottle to abusiveparents [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 17:05 Moist-supermarket249 [TOMT] [BOOK] Book about a boy who eats a chicken that is really an alien and get the power of being super lucky.

Hi I remember reading a book about 10 ish years ago from my local library about this boy I think named Jack. Jack lived with his "aunts" they weren't really his aunts but they adopted him after he was left at a bus stop as a baby. Jack was forced to so the house work but one day Jack eats a chicken and gains superluck, I think it was revealed that the chicken was an alien that transformed into a chicken and that's where the powers come from. I remember that Jack leaves his aunts one day and meets a group of 20 years and there was two main people in the group. One was a man and the other a woman. I think they were dating but I don't remember if it was stated in the book or implied. What I do remember is that the man said the two following things, 1 I remember these sewagers like the back of my hand before it got too hair, to which Jack said it's true his hands are hairy, and 2 that the woman at the same date every year goes to a bus stop for some reason, implying that she was Jack's mother but that wasn't confirmed too.
Any help or anything at all would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.
submitted by Moist-supermarket249 to tipofmytongue [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 17:04 AutoModerator [230605] UJUNG Weekly Discussion Thread

Welcome UJUNGS!!!

New to cosmicgirls? Check out our main wiki page here :)
While we are all on this subreddit as fans of WJSN, discussion in these weekly threads is not limited to WJSN. Feel free to start a discussion thread in the comments below. The ultimate goal of these threads is to move all discussions here on one post, with the idea of all UJUNGs on the sub opining and having a good time on the thread :)



submitted by AutoModerator to cosmicgirls [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 17:04 mommaimpostingagain One day online for the first time in over a month. I feel physically sick.

Can’t believe I used to do this every day. Just spent an hour or so scrolling the top rsp posts for the last month and I feel a dull weight and a nauseous sense of dread in my stomach. My very body is rejecting this website. Same for a quick sojourn to Twitter and YouTube to check in on the old accounts I used to find entertaining. I realize now this is how I felt all the time, for years. Disgusting.
For context, see my last post:
In short, I turned off phone data and home internet late last year. A little over a month ago I traded my smart phone for a dumb one and only go online (on a library computer) when I need to for checking email, paying bills, looking up practical information, etc.
Wasn’t sure how hard it would be to totally disconnect. When I made that post I was half expecting to return to the sub in failure and shame, but the last month has gone surprisingly smoothly. Even during the rare opportunities I’ve had I to jump back on Reddit, twitter, YouTube, there was no desire.
When I made that post I said I’d come back in 30 days and share how it’s going, but after a month I didn’t have the ability or inclination to do so. Right now I’m sitting at a friends house, on his internet. I have time to kill and a tablet at my disposal, so here I am, a little belatedly.
Let’s get some things out of the way first: yes, I have self control issues. I was given unfettered access to the internet at a young age and it shaped my life and personality in ways I’m not proud of. Maybe you could call me an internet addict. That feels a bit dramatic to me but maybe it’s accurate. I don’t really care what you call it, the fact is, if I have internet at my constant disposal it is detrimental to my well-being.
Since I have failed at using in a healthy way I’ve just stopped using it entirely. It’s that simple. RSP snark-posters will clown me for that, and that’s okay, but for those who are regarded enough to take any of it seriously I hope you can take just one lesson from this post: Maybe it’s shameful to be weak, to be addicted, to find yourself unable to help yourself, but it’s a million times more shameful to cling to bad habits and poor life choices because you don’t want to be made fun of for admitting you have a problem. Especially if it’s rsp posters you’re trying to impress.
Now to the internet stuff.
I stand by everything I said before. For me, quitting casual internet use has been overwhelmingly positive. Every step toward total cessation has been a good one, and at no point have I felt like I’ve gone too far. Completely cutting myself off (or almost completely) this past month has only made the experience better.
I read like I’m in middle school again. Every day. I go to the library and pick out a stack of books that look interesting, or that I’ve always wanted to read, and I finish them.
My guitar, which used to sit untouched for months at a time, is my constant companion. I was never good, but at this rate I think I will actually get there.
I sit and listen to music now almost as much as I did in college. It’s harder to discover and listen to new stuff without the internet, but the effort makes the appreciation that much deeper. Can’t remember the last time I listened to an entire album straight through but I do that all the time now.
I go outside now as much as I’ve always wanted to. Hammock and book sessions at the park. Walks and bike rides. Sitting out on the front porch with tea in the mornings. I used to go to work, come home and sit on the couch, repeat, every day. I still do that sometimes, but the need for stimulation drives me outdoors more and more often and the lack of phone distraction makes me appreciate it so much more.
It isn’t, of course, a magic pill that has solved all of life’s problems.
I haven’t been completely transformed, I’m not perfectly self-actualized and my life hasn’t blossomed into a idyllic pastoral trad dream state. I’m still neurotic and anxious and impulsive and driven to distraction. My attention span is still fucked (but getting better). I still struggle with the mundanities and indignities of day-to-day life.
I’ve missed some appointments. Still struggling to actually use a calendar. I wasn’t great at that when the calendar was on my phone either, but I have to admit I’m a bit worse when it’s on my wall instead.
I have gotten slightly lost a couple times without gps. Often I rely on my girlfriends phone when we’re going someplace together and I feel like I’m cheating. I know my city pretty well and I can always get home or to some other known landmark, but it can be stressful when you aren’t sure exactly where you are and you have someplace to be.
I miss being able to look things up immediately. Sometimes I write something down to google later and forget about it by the next time I go to the library. I check out reference books when I need to, but there are information sources online that just can’t be matched in print. Sometimes the library doesn’t have the books or movies I want either and I just have to deal with it.
Been more social than before, but certainly there are some difficulties. People are almost always positive/envious when my lack of internet and social media presence comes up (I promise I’m only a little obnoxious about it), but there’s a certain amount of suspicion as well. If I wasn’t in a relationship already I imagine I’d be disbarring myself from dating any normal, online woman. Don’t really see that as a downside tbh.
I feel more isolated and lonelier now. Don’t get me wrong, I spend more time with friends now, but the inherent loneliness of my average western lifestyle is more painful and harder to ignore. I think this is a good thing. I see it this way: the loneliness is my brain (soul?) telling me that there is a deep problem in my life that need to be addressed. Distracting myself with internet usage was akin to someone with chronic pain taking daily painkillers instead of addressing the root cause. Not only did it allow me ignore the fundamental problem, but the analgesic itself was slowly destroying my mind and body.
It’s been only half a year since I went 90% off, and only a little over a month since I brought that up to almost 100%. I’m not sure how it’s going to go in the future. I have a feeling that the positive changes are going to escalate instead of plateau over the next few months, but I don’t know. One thing I do know for sure: I have zero regrets. This was the right decision for me, and I wish I had done it years ago.
The point of this post wasn’t to brag, or to show off how much better I am than you. I promise, my self-esteem is basement level and I hope, for your sake, that you don’t ever feel envy toward any poster on rsp. I made this post for one reason:
I know there are a lot of people on this sub who are like me. You struggle with social media, internet, phone usage, etc. You don’t like its place in your life but you struggle to do anything about it. You wonder if you could give it up entirely but you’re unsure if you could, or if it would help. I can’t answer that for you, all I can do is reiterate what I’ve said above.
Logging off has been overwhelmingly positive in my life. I have no regrets, and I’m someone who regrets everything. It’s very possible. It’s not even that difficult. Even if you can’t completely turn it off (work, health, etc) every step away is a positive one.
Have a lazy day ahead of me so I’ll hang out and respond if anyone comments, but after that I’m deleting this account and not looking back. It was unpleasant to scroll through this last months top posts. Whatever I used to get from this subreddit, I no longer get it.
submitted by mommaimpostingagain to redscarepod [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 17:03 throwowaywriting Title: Repetition

Hey, so this is the first chapter of a book I wrote. I accidentally finished it but I think my writing is horrible. So now I need to start the editing. I write for the love of writing but would love some help improving. Here is the first chapter:
Chapter I
This is a story about a woman.
A woman that would occasionally drink a glass of wine and tell stories.

One evening sitting in the kitchen.
Glass of wine.
She told this story:

There was a little girl that had no parents.
She woke up and realised she had no parents.
Poor little girl.
One day her mother come to her room and said, “I am going to burn this house down with you inside.” She could feel it, the heat getting closer, she could feel her skin. Burning. Red. Fire.

The lady with the glass of wine told that story while wearing a helmet synthesizer. It was a tool created 30 years before. It could read people’s minds and put their thoughts on another helmet for people to feel.
At first it was used by the government but then some rich artists released live poetry on it. Small. Limited potential.
In a stroke of genius, it was released to the masses. Art exploded, everyone could make their own movie, design their own cathedrals. Paint the moon in a second.
Everyone could see your journey through everything.

Groups against it quickly form. Different arguments, laws came, mass media used to scare. “NO CHANGING THE WORLD”. It started to disappear, outlaw and taboo.

There are still secret room out there, where you can use it. And some licensed ones with large studies. But you know who had one?
The lady with the glass of wine.
Five years before the first law she bought 10 of them. She knew she was at that small impasse in history where cocaine was in the coke bottle.
One day she took one out of the basement and put it on her desk.
And now she drinks a glass of wine, sits at her desk, records her mind, and tells her stories.
submitted by throwowaywriting to writers [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 17:03 sweeterthansweetums HCBM was in hospital, just venting…

Some quick backstory: I have dated my husband for 7 years and we got married last year. He has two pre teens with his ex-girlfriend. HCBM moved with her other now ex bf to a different state and had two more kids with that man. Back in 2021, since her and the other man broke up and she got an apartment, she cannot financially support any of the four kids, the oldest 2 live with my husband and I, and the other two live with the other father. We have never had a civil relationship she always blamed me for all of her problems. She even called my mother-in-law the night after our wedding telling her son never wanted marriage and she was jealous we had a wedding.
She has always depended on someone else to take care of her financially and would work on and off again. Even calling my mother -in-law and saying she needs money to help the kids. That’s another subreddit in itself. Now a month ago, she was out late at night doing god knows what and a got hit by a drunk driver resulting in surgery. She has a phone but unable to pay service so she uses Facebook messenger to communicate. She ended up FaceTiming my DH later in the morning to tell him what happened. She was still on hospital drugs so her answers were a bit incoherent. She just kept repeating she wanted to see the kids and she wanted to see my DH and for him to come visit her… DH just told her he would call her back and to get rest. A month later she was released from the hospital.
She ended up calling the kids and telling them she won’t see them for awhile because she is currently staying in her home country to have her aunt and mom take care of her. My rant is that she would FaceTime my DH while he was at work knowing the kids were at school and ask him “where is your wife?” Claiming she was trying to see the kids, my DH told her to only call him when the kids come home from school. She calls my husbands phone nearly every day and for someone who is recovering she always has her makeup fully beat and hair done like she has places to go. Now when she calls, she makes comments implying that my DH and I are not taking good care of them like she’s high and mighty. I want her to stop calling and go back to when she barely communicated with the kids. Sigh… I’m just tired.
submitted by sweeterthansweetums to stepparents [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 17:02 cnitcher First build in a while!

First build in about 10 years, been out of the game for a while.
>**What will you be doing with this PC? Be as specific as possible, and include specific games or programs you will be using.**
Most likely will be playing Diablo 4. Definitely will be playing other games like APEX. I’d like to have 4K gaming but not an absolute must.
>**What is your maximum budget before rebates/shipping/taxes?**
$1500-1800 max
>**When do you plan on building/buying the PC? Note: beyond a week or two from today means any build you receive will be out of date when you want to buy.**
Probably within the next couple of months. No big rush, trying to finish Zelda before getting into diablo 4.
>**What, exactly, do you need included in the budget? (ToweOS/monitokeyboard/mouse/etc\)**
Tower (mid size), copy of windows, and a monitor
>**Which country (and state/province) will you be purchasing the parts in? If you're in US, do you have access to a Microcenter location?**
US, no access to microcenter
>**If reusing any parts (including monitor(s)/keyboard/mouse/etc), what parts will you be reusing? Brands and models are appreciated.**
I’ve got a keyboard and mouse that I’ll be reusing, as well as a 500gb SSD. Will need more than this for storage and stuff.
>**Will you be overclocking? If yes, are you interested in overclocking right away, or down the line? CPU and/or GPU?**
No intentions on overclocking
>**Are there any specific features or items you want/need in the build? (ex: SSD, large amount of storage or a RAID setup, CUDA or OpenCL support, etc)**
Not really. I was thinking I definitely want an intel processor but an AMD GPU.
>**Do you have any specific case preferences (Size like ITX/microATX/mid-towefull-tower, styles, colors, window or not, LED lighting, etc), or a particular color theme preference for the components?**
I’d love to do a white themed build. Really like the way white builds look with the white LED fans
>**Do you need a copy of Windows included in the budget? If you do need one included, do you have a preference?**
Yes, no preference
For extra info, I would like everything to be upgradeable over time. Open to any input! Thank you!
submitted by cnitcher to buildapcforme [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 17:00 _call-me-al_ [Sun, Jun 04 2023] TL;DR — This is what you missed in the last 24 hours on Reddit

If you want to receive this as a daily email in your inbox, you can now join at this link


Chinese warship nearly hits U.S. destroyer in Taiwan Strait during joint Canada-U.S. mission
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Le Pen’s far right served as mouthpiece for the Kremlin, says French parliamentary report
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Lecture on Holocaust in Poland canceled after far-right lawmaker storms podium
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Clumps of 5,000-mile seaweed blob bring flesh-eating bacteria to Florida
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Tennessee federal judge rules 'drag ban' is unconstitutional
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2 young boys killed by gunfire were playing with kittens in yard, Pennsylvania officials say
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Study supports the use of anti-poverty programmes such as cash transfers to improve population health. Researchers found that cash transfer programmes were associated with significant reductions in mortality among children under five years of age and women.
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Escalated police stops of Black men are linguistically and psychologically distinct in their earliest moments
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People with heightened sexual nostalgia tend to also have heightened sexual satisfaction, according to new research. The results indicate that the positive association between sexual nostalgia and satisfaction is particularly strong among insecurely attached individuals.
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Milky Way over a Turquoise Wonderland. Credits: Petr Horálek / Institute of Physics in Opava.
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Jupiter seen from the James Webb Space Telescope
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NASA's Mars helicopter is somehow still flying - and playing hide-and-seek
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Delegates working to end global plastics pollution agree to craft a draft treaty
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Artificial Intelligence Will Entrench Global Inequality - The debate about regulating AI urgently needs input from the global south.
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Experts issue a dire warning about AI and encourage limits be imposed
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If your penis made a noise every time it got hard, what would you want the noise to be?
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What’s something (besides your phone) that you take with you everywhere?
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What will always be dirty no matter how often it's cleaned?
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TIL that Steve Jobs is buried in an unmarked grave
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TIL that an American POW in World War 2 was questioned about US atomic bombs after the bombing of Hiroshima. He told them he didn't know anything about that, but when they threatened to kill them, he "revealed" they had hundreds and that Tokyo and Kyoto were next.
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TIL that the legs of the 630 foot 192 m) Gateway Arch in St. Louis, MO had to be built with a 1/64” (0.4 mm) tolerance so that they would meet at the top. Several filmmakers documented the entire construction in hope that the legs wouldn’t meet.
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[OC] The entire history of Premier League teams in one chart ⚽️📈
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More than 50% of Vienna's Area is closer than 2km to a metro station [OC]
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[OC] A map of when same sex marriage legalized in each US state.
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Why is pita in Greece nothing like pita in the US? Am I missing something?
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What can an air fryer do that an oven can’t?
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Want to make queso that's dippable regardless of temperature, like the store-bought stuff? Use sodium citrate and corn starch.
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[homemade] lemon curd and blueberry pancakes.
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[I ate] pulpitos
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[homemade] cheddar cheese biscuits
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Walt Disney's Pixar Targets 'Lightyear' Execs Among 75 Job Cuts
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Contact (1997)
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What is one seemingly insignificant scene or character in a movie that you just can't get out of your mind?
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Touched A Nerve, Jon Silent (Me), Ink and Acrylic, 2023
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Pluto, Dracopuella (me), digital, 2023
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Middle of nowhere, Naif(me), Pixelart, 2023
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Julie Plec and More WGA Members Detail Writers Strike Negotiations, Demand Streamers to Release Ratings: ‘We’re Mad’
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‘Full Monty’ Actor Reveals He Was Sacked From Disney TV Series After A Female Runner Saw Him Naked In Trailer
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'House of the Dragon’ Star Olivia Cooke Is Totally Fine if You Don’t Like Alicent: ‘That’s the Beauty of What We Do’
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Senator John Fetterman at Pride parade.
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Reunion of the cast of The Mighty Ducks
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My parents 46 year old blender still works like new
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Paula Abdul fatality
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Nest with a 360° view
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Just lay back and relax
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I’m at the NYC Macys and the escalator is made out of wood.
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A small local movie theater me uses reusable metal bowls for the popcorn
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Rabdomly found a TARDIS in somebody's front yard.
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*Squirrel trying to fake an injury *
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Man puts 10ft buggy wheels on a Tesla and drives it upside down
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Never Forget what happened in China 34 years ago: Remembering the fearless Demonstrators at the 1989 Tiananmen Square Protests
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Thats not why you get cats
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One of them is very smart
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Cat carries mouse to food bowl
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Potato requires belly scratches
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Cute Child Comforts Adorable, Nervous, Puppy
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Puppy fall asleep during the meditation session.
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submitted by _call-me-al_ to RedditTLDR [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 16:56 BarWinter Should we back out?

Made a decision base on emotions about 2 weeks earlier and closing date is getting closer. Feeling a bit worried. Wondering if anyone can give some advice on our situation.
We made an offer and got accepted for 530k, we have been conditionally approved and it looks like our monthly payment with tax and pmi is going to be about $4.5k a month. My partner and I both pay about $2.9k a month in student loans. We both bring in after taxes $11k. Is this a good decision? We been living we our parents for about a year and convinced ourself this house will make us happy - even though it would take up most of our income. Should be back out and lose the earnest and wait for the market to be better? This house was worth about 370k about two years ago
submitted by BarWinter to FirstTimeHomeBuyer [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 16:54 Wamasam151 I’m not sure if I made the right decision breaking up with my girlfriend

Little bit of back story My girlfriend and I had been dating for 2 months before I left her, due to her not making any effort to spend time with me or be a part of my life The first month of our relationship was incredible, we were spending 3-4 days a week with eachother, and I feel so deeply in love with this women, more than I ever have. Because she’s a tattoo artist she went to a tattoo convention 8 hours away from me for two weeks, we talked everyday still like everything was normal but when she got back and I picked her up from the airport she didn’t want to spend time with me she just wanted to go home and rest( imo that’s fair enough airports are a pain)a few days roll by and she still doesn’t want to do anything because she’s too busy, but that weekend comes and I asked her what she’s doing and she said she’s going out to the clubs with her friends for a birthday. (Ok whatever not that big of a deal) next week rolls round and she gets super sick meningitis, I offer to help cook her food or get meds for her to try help and she turns me down at every turn, the weekend comes by again she’s going out with friends again and not even letting me know. At this point I haven’t seen her since I picked her up from the airport and she’s make no effort to do anything with me but she makes time for her mates. Third week rolls round same deal. I brought up my concerns with her and she called me selfish and controlling for wanting to be prioritised more in her life. At this point I was a mental wreck and constantly overhinking. So I tried to make plans to break up with her In person, but every attempt was met with im too sick. So I went to her house while she was with out with her mates and took my stuff that I kept at her house, and told her that I couldn’t keep doing this anymore, and she replied with calling me selfish for not caring about her or asking about her doctors appointments, (when all she did when I tried to ask about her day was leave me on read) and that I only cared about my self. So I wished her the best and told her that I was breaking up with her because I couldn’t take it, which was met with her throwing insults at me and demanding everything she’d ever bought me back. I know how this looks but it’s been 3 weeks now and I feel broken, did I make the right decision.
submitted by Wamasam151 to BreakUps [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 16:54 Deus_Exx UK Fiancée visa accommodation requirements question.

Hi, got a question regarding accommodation. My situation is a bit of a weird one.
We have intended to use my parent's place as proof of accommodation. It's a fairly large 3 bedroom house, 1 bathroom, 1 living room, 1 dining room, huge garden. It's just me and my parents so we do have a spare bedroom.
What documents would I need to prove that accommodation. Also do they have to necessarily be within date? My guess for documents would be a council tax letter, a mortgage letter and a land deed thing. Is there anything else I might need for that?

But I'm also in the mortgage process for buying my own place, but it still might be a while before that's finished. Is it even worth mentioning it to them if I'm using my parents as accommodation proof?
submitted by Deus_Exx to ukvisa [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 16:52 senistur1 Disgruntled tenant in Michigan

My business partner owns the home in question. It was purchased in his name and no one is on the deed/mortgage with him. He took the home over from a “friend” who was going to lose it on a land contract.
The deal (no contract) was a gentlemen’s handshake in that my partner would buy the home and the “friend” would cover the mortgage and they would figure it out later. Fast forward to current day and the “friend” has stolen about $200K from my partner in a business that the two had together. Needless to say, my partner has evicted the “friend” with the move out date being Monday.
The “friends” attorney instructed him to file a claim of interest on the house, arguing that my partner buying the house was a mere exchange in helping the “friend” keep the home. Moreover, the “friend” put $50K into remodeling the kitchen when he purchased the house on a land contract. “Friend” is also claiming the house appreciation. “Friend” has not paid the monthly payment to my partner in 3 months now and has been liquidating our belongings (dock, fishing gear, jet ski lift, small boat, wakesurfing boards, etc).
I’m going to hire an additional attorney tomorrow granted the turn this debacle has taken…
Any suggestions/recommendations/thoughts on the situation? If my partner owns the house with a full blown mortgage and the “friend” is not on the mortgage or deed, he has no footing correct?
submitted by senistur1 to legaladvice [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 16:49 billybob70164 I’m not sure what kind of person I am

No idea if it belongs here so…
Growing up, I(M) read books for hours, played video games, loved staying at home. I was the complete opposite of my family who loved to travel, play sports, do things outside. My little brother Stephen was their favorite because he absolutely loved those things. His favorite sports were American football and base ball. My little sister Morgan was next because while she loved sports and outdoorsy stuff, she didn’t like it as much as our brother. So it was always what he wanted to do when we went out. My family would spend tons of money on Stephen because he was always Playing sports. We had to travel a lot so it was always hotel rooms and eating out and when I wanted to do something that I thought we could all enjoy, it was always “let’s do that next week” but when next week came, it was always “we are tired, maybe next time” so after a year or two of getting my hopes up and then crushed, I stopped asking to do stuff with them. They always made me go with them despite the fact that I absolutely didn’t like it. It got worse when my parents signed me up for local sports teams and would then get mad at me for not liking it. So I learned to not say anything, and I kept quiet and did what they wanted. When I got older, I was able to put my foot down a bit and told them I will no longer be playing sports, though looking back, I was probably too old anyway. Anyway, I get to high school and I would spend a lot of time in the school library reading. I feel a little more comfortable and I meet back up with a old friend Kalie(F) that moved away back in elementary school. Well we start dating probably around 9th or 10th and she introduces me to my future fiancé Leah(F). Well it turns out that Kalie fucking cheats on me with her cousin and honestly I’m a little hurt but also kinda relieved. Looking back, I don’t think I ever really liked Kalie like that and as a 13-15 year old boy, I didn’t know how to bring it up so I didn’t say anything and just tried making her happy. Leah finds out and tells Kalie to either break up with me or she’d tell me. So Kalie breaks up with me and I don’t find out until later from Leah. According to Leah, I was Kalies fall back guy. If something happened to her little side piece, she’s come back to me like nothing happened. So I’m a little depressed but honestly not that much. Sometime later, Leah and I start dating and we start learning about each other. I eventually meet her family and her grandparents, especially her grandma, loves me lol. Her dad was and still is an ass but we don’t really see him except for on holidays.
Anyway, Leah helps me feel like more of myself. But then we graduate and she goes to college 2 hours away and I got to one closer to home so we don’t see each other as often. Two years go by and I go to her college and we rent a place together and it’s absolutely amazing. I don’t have to worry about my family or someone making me do something I don’t want anymore. Well two years after that, she graduates and we stay in our little appartement for a few font ha while we both look for jobs. She applies to a Fortune 500 company and she tells me about it. She tells me that we would have to move to Minnesota and live in the city and I’m super excited for it. She makes it to the final part of the interview but doesn’t get the job. We both get sad about the missed opportunity but we move on. Eventually, we can’t afford to stay where we are, but my family offers us a little shed behind their house that we clean up and make into a living space. Well we both still don’t have jobs but Leah’s grandma gets her in touch with some people at the library in the near city. Leah graduated with a “interdisciplinary studies” degree with her areas of concentration being computer science, technical writing, and game design. The IT person at the library passed away and Leah gets the job. At that point, I’m still job hunting and my father offers me a way to make money. He runs a small flooring business and he tells me to come work with him until I find a job. Thankfully Leah and I don’t have to pay rent so we can save. Anyway, I’m not really a construction type of guy but I suck it up and go work with my father until I get a part time job and that same library as Leah. There are somewhere around 12 libraries in our parish and when someone calls out sick, I take over on top of my regular hours. Well, because I’m part time, I don’t work everyday which isn’t good enough for my family so father tells me to go work with him while I’m not at the library and I say sure. Well after 2-3 months, father and mother aren’t happy anymore with that arrangement. They want me to have a steady full time job so that I can make the most amount of money possible at the expense of my happiness. So they get me an interview with a friend of theirs that works at a cable and internet company. At first, I think it’s lot that bad but then I start do more and more physical work and while I can handle some, this is a little too much for me. I don’t want to do this for the rest of my life so I look for other jobs. I have no idea what my family is going to say.
And through all this time, I have no idea what kind of person I am. I like dirty jokes and so does my brother and I tried to tell him some but it’s just kinda awkward between us and I know my family loves me but sometimes I just feel like I need to get away from everything. Like I need a break from life to just relax but thats not exactly possible so I have to suck it up and move on. I feel like I have no idea how to talk to my family. I feel like I’m always about to say something wrong. I feel like they are always about to criticize me for what I say because they have before.
And I’m somewhat jealous of my brother because he has a rich fiancé. She pays for so much of his stuff. He has a job yes and it doesn’t pay that bad but she’s always taking him on cruises and vacations and why does he get to experience that stuff when it was always him that got so much. I’m jealous that my parents loves him more. I’m jealous that my parents always spent more time with him and my sister. I’m jealous of how close they are. But I’m hurt that it way almost always about my siblings and what they wanted.
I love my fiancé with all my heart and I wouldn’t change a thing about her. She helped me discover things about myself that I never would have on my own or with my family. She’s my soulmate and I look forward to having kids with her, growing old with her. I want to kiss her and hug her and never let go and I always hope she feels the same way. But there’s always that little voice of jealousy in the back of my mind that I try to ignore but sometimes I just can’t.
Anyway, I think I’m just rambling now but I’ve been holding that in for a long time and while I don’t feel lighter or anything, it does feel nice to finally get that off my chest.
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2023.06.04 16:48 Compulsive-Gremlin Scam like letter my neighbors and I all got yesterday.

Scam like letter my neighbors and I all got yesterday. submitted by Compulsive-Gremlin to lancaster [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 16:47 Unsilenced_Chaos_ Do you think marvel will reprint the Dan Abnett omnibus anytime soon?

So I’ve always loved the GOTG movies and before the first one had no real knowledge of them other than nova. And after vol 3 I’ve decided to buy the on going run of the GotG so hopefully that’s good but I want to read some of the older runs. Especially Abnetts run. Mainly because I’ve heard it’s amazing and it’s the origin of the modern team but also because I somewhat know him (my mum is a painter and decorator and she painted his house) and I managed to meet him. Which was really awesome.
But I really went to pick up the omnibus’s but I think all of them are out of print which is a shame because they’re pretty expensive. Do you think marvel will re release them or re print them in the future
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2023.06.04 16:46 mismaggiemoo Super confused, very angry, and severely hurt. Help.

Ive been wanting to write a post but have held off. I can no longer do that anymore, I need some guidance. So my (mid 20s) bf just initiated a breakup going on 3.5 weeks ago. He initiated due to a situation where he felt hurt and betrayed and I feel I didnt do anything wrong. Despite it not being a mutual decision, I still know that it was the right one and agreed it was best. We had a beautiful and loving and healthy relationship but the last few months were rocky. The breakup itself was super hard obviously, but it was exceptionally peaceful and loving. We lived together basically since we started dating for about 2+ years. Anyways, after the situation happened he pretty much made up his mind that I betrayed his trust and he was not going to even try and move past it. He packed his things up and moved out. He left some stuff at my house. We didnt decide on NC, but have been very LC and don’t reach out much. I have the utmost respect and love for him and respect his space and boundaries. About a week ago he “forgot” to tell me that he went over to my house, into whats now solely MY room, picked up some stuff, and proceeded to leave with the door unlocked. Despite feeling a little upset by this, I just respectfully asked if stopped by and if he could let me know if he was going to in the future. Ok, not a problem, wasnt supposed to happen again. Except it did. Last night. He is friends with my roommate and i guess they went out together. We shared locations still and I saw that he was at my house again, while I stayed at a friends. Pretty sure he slept there, likely in MY room. As I’m trying to fall asleep, riddled with anxiety, his best friend sends me a long message, guessing they were together, mind you at MY house, about how I need to stop sharing my location with him, its only hurting him, I need to let go, I need to move on, and how I need to deal with the consequences for what ive done, which really was nothing wrong. He stopped sharing his location with me & stopped mine as well. Wtf?! Ive done nothing but respect him and his boundaries. I’m so sick. I’m literally trying to do everything right. Scratch that, I know I am. Why did his friend text me? I would never allow that. Salt in the wound. How can he stay in my house? How could my roommate let him? She knew after the last time how that upset me. I feel so disrespected. How could he not care? How does he not love me enough to not do that? How could he not think of me? Also again, why did his best friend text me as if I’m hindering his capability to move on??? I’m trying! I don’t necessarily want to, but I’m letting him go. Bc thats what you do when you love someone, right?? Help, wtf.
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2023.06.04 16:44 ch536 I don't know how I'm going to cope now the 4 month sleep regression has hit

I have a 4yo and a 4 month old who is waking up every hour if not more during the night and is only catnapping during the day. My daughter goes to preschool 9-3 on Monday, Wednesday and Friday but it's closed tomorrow. I don't know how I'm going to cope with such little sleep on the Monday and Tuesday whilst I've got both kids all day. It's been okay this week as my partner has been off and has taken the baby in the morning to give me a solid block of sleep (like 2 hrs before baby needs boobing again). Argh, send help! Full respect for single parents with kids this young and working parents - don't know how I'd do a days work in this state, I can barely keep my 4 yo happy and up to date with house related stuff as it is
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2023.06.04 16:44 I-am-the-Peel (Spoilers Extended) A Character Analysis of Varys, the fake and lying eunuch

Apologies for the length and lateness of this post, past few months have been quite chaotic and haven't had much access to the internet, I dunno when I'll be back on this sub again after this so until then, more posts from me will be a Dream for Spring Summer (probably)
Over the years I've read a great many theories about the character of Varys, his motivations, his scheming throughout the series and his endgame, but none of them have ever truly sat well with me for how much his character feels simplified. He is one of ASOIAF's most complex characters who I still believe we haven't entirely cracked yet, and I for one still believe even after writing this post up and reflecting on it, there's still some of his character that I haven't figured out.
However, I want to propose an alternative character analysis to the character of Varys, one that drifts away from the more common take on his character - Varys is not a eunuch or a friend of Tyrion Lannister, and has spent his entire life lying about his manhood to deter anyone from thinking that he could father any children, so that fAegon, his true son, would always be protected while hiding.
Let us begin by breaking down each of the lies that define his character.
First, the lie that he was castrated as a young slave and had his manhood thrown into a fire by 'a certain man', which resulted in the fire turning magically blue and 'a voice' speaking out to Varys.
"One day at Myr, a certain man came to our folly. After the performance, he made an offer for me that my master found too tempting to refuse. I was in terror. I feared the man meant to use me as I had heard men used small boys, but in truth the only part of me he had need of was my manhood. He gave me a potion that made me powerless to move or speak, yet did nothing to dull my senses. With a long hooked blade, he sliced me root and stem, chanting all the while. I watched him burn my manly parts on a brazier. The flames turned blue, and I heard a voice answer his call, though I did not understand the words they spoke. "The mummers had sailed by the time he was done with me. Once I had served his purpose, the man had no further interest in me, so he put me out. When I asked him what I should do now, he answered that he supposed I should die. To spite him, I resolved to live. I begged, I stole, and I sold what parts of my body still remained to me. Soon I was as good a thief as any in Myr, and when I was older I learned that often the contents of a man's letters are more valuable than the contents of his purse. "Yet I still dream of that night, my lord. Not of the sorcerer, nor his blade, nor even the way my manhood shriveled as it burned. I dream of the voice. The voice from the flames. Was it a god, a demon, some conjurer's trick? I could not tell you, and I know all the tricks. All I can say for a certainty is that he called it, and it answered, and since that day I have hated magic and all those who practice it. If Lord Stannis is one such, I mean to see him dead." - ACOK - TYRION X
Now there is much from this excerpt to raise complaints and questions about Varys' story;
But the weakest part of all is that Varys says that he "hates magic and all those who practise it", yet he goes to great lengths to protect and look out for Daenerys, and try to join fAegon's forces with hers, despite knowing that she has three magical dragons by her side.
"How many days until we reach the river?" he asked Illyrio that evening. "At this pace, your queen's dragons will be larger than Aegon's three before I can lay eyes upon them." "Would it were so. A large dragon is more fearsome than a small one." The magister shrugged. "Much as it would please me to welcome Queen Daenerys to Volantis, I must rely on you and Griff for that. I can serve her best in Pentos, smoothing the way for her return. So long as I am with you, though … well, an old fat man must have his comforts, yes? Come, drink a cup of wine." - ADWD - TYRION II
Illyrio is Varys' best friend and closest confidant, who he works with to protect Daenerys for much of her life and is willing to crown her as Queen alongside fAegon even though she has magical fire-breathing dragons that Varys, a victim of magical flames, would despise.
Illyrio, the same man who praised R'hllor, a God that Varys despises;
Her brother was waiting in the cool of the entry hall, seated on the edge of the pool, his hand trailing in the water. He rose when she appeared and looked her over critically. "Stand there," he told her. "Turn around. Yes. Good. You look …" "Regal," Magister Illyrio said, stepping through an archway. He moved with surprising delicacy for such a massive man. Beneath loose garments of flame-colored silk, rolls of fat jiggled as he walked. Gemstones glittered on every finger, and his man had oiled his forked yellow beard until it shone like real gold. "May the Lord of Light shower you with blessings on this most fortunate day, Princess Daenerys," the magister said as he took her hand. He bowed his head, showing a thin glimpse of crooked yellow teeth through the gold of his beard. "She is a vision, Your Grace, a vision," he told her brother. "Drogo will be enraptured." - AGOT - DAENERYS I
Neither Viserys or Daenerys were followers of R'hllor at this point, or surrounded by any followers, meaning Illyrio didn't need to bring up this form of prayer to R'hllor unless it was genuine or near genuine on his own part.
It makes little sense that Varys would entertain the company of those who worship R'hllor or magical forms of fire, if Varys truly is traumatised by what seemingly happened to him as a slave child by fire.
As well as Illyrio, this is apparent in Aerys II, who would regularly burn people in the throne room with wildfire, in the presence of Varys;
Frustrated, Aerys turned to the Wisdoms of the ancient Guild of Alchemists, who knew the secret of producing the volatile jade green substance known as wildfire, said to be a close cousin to dragonflame. The pyromancers became a regular fixture at his court as the king's fascination with fire grew. By 280 AC, Aerys II had taken to burning traitors, murderers, and plotters, rather than hanging or beheading them. The king seemed to take great pleasure in these fiery executions, which were presided over by Wisdom Rossart, the grand master of the Guild of much so that he granted Rossart the title of Lord and gave him a seat upon the small council. - TWOIAF - THE TARGARYEN KINGS - AERYS II
Not only would Varys be present to witness these burnings, but Varys even encouraged Aerys to burn other individuals suspected of treachery, and fuelled both Aerys' paranoia and bloodlust;
He floated in heat, in memory. "After dancing griffins lost the Battle of the Bells, Aerys exiled him." Why am I telling this absurd ugly child? "He had finally realized that Robert was no mere outlaw lord to be crushed at whim, but the greatest threat House Targaryen had faced since Daemon Blackfyre. The king reminded Lewyn Martell gracelessly that he held Elia and sent him to take command of the ten thousand Dornishmen coming up the kingsroad. Jon Darry and Barristan Selmy rode to Stoney Sept to rally what they could of griffins' men, and Prince Rhaegar returned from the south and persuaded his father to swallow his pride and summon my father. But no raven returned from Casterly Rock, and that made the king even more afraid. He saw traitors everywhere, and Varys was always there to point out any he might have missed. So His Grace commanded his alchemists to place caches of wildfire all over King's Landing. Beneath Baelor's Sept and the hovels of Flea Bottom, under stables and storehouses, at all seven gates, even in the cellars of the Red Keep itself. - ASOS - JAIME V
Varys developed a reputation for egging on Aerys' paranoia and encouraging him to execute apparent traitors by fire, so much so that people like Barristan lay chief blame for Aerys' downfall into madness on Varys for exploiting it;
"It is not a question of wanting. The throne is mine, as Robert's heir. That is law. After me, it must pass to my daughter, unless Selyse should finally give me a son." He ran three fingers lightly down the table, over the layers of smooth hard varnish, dark with age. "I am king. Wants do not enter into it. I have a duty to my daughter. To the realm. Even to Robert. He loved me but little, I know, yet he was my brother. The Lannister woman gave him horns and made a motley fool of him. She may have murdered him as well, as she murdered Jon Arryn and Ned Stark. For such crimes there must be justice. Starting with Cersei and her abominations. But only starting. I mean to scour that court clean. As Robert should have done, after the Trident. Ser Barristan once told me that the rot in King Aerys's reign began with Varys. The eunuch should never have been pardoned. No more than the Kingslayer. At the least, Robert should have stripped the white cloak from Jaime and sent him to the Wall, as Lord Stark urged. He listened to Jon Arryn instead. I was still at Storm's End, under siege and unconsulted." He turned abruptly, to give Davos a hard shrewd look. "The truth, now. Why did you wish to murder Lady Melisandre?" - ASOS - DAVOS IV
It makes very little sense that Varys, a eunuch who seemingly hates worshippers of R'hllor and pyromancers for burning people and sacrificing his manhood to the flames as a child, would be best friends with a man who praises R'hllor or encourage his previous King to burn several people, many of whom were likely innocent of the claims of treachery put against them.
But it makes a lot more sense that Varys actually never had a problem with R'hllor or wildfire, and instead chose to encourage Aerys' paranoia so that he would always both seem useful to Aerys and be on good relations with him, to solidify his position of power on the Small Council, given that he was just a young foreign man in Westeros and wholly dependent on Aerys' support to maintain his standing in King's Landing.
The second lie of Varys' character that I wish to tackle is his apparent concern for the wellbeing of children;
"No," Ned pleaded, his voice cracking. "Varys, gods have mercy, do as you like with me, but leave my daughter out of your schemes. Sansa's no more than a child." "Rhaenys was a child too. Prince Rhaegar's daughter. A precious little thing, younger than your girls. She had a small black kitten she called Balerion, did you know? I always wondered what happened to him. Rhaenys liked to pretend he was the true Balerion, the Black Dread of old, but I imagine the Lannisters taught her the difference between a kitten and a dragon quick enough, the day they broke down her door." Varys gave a long weary sigh, the sigh of a man who carried all the sadness of the world in a sack upon his shoulders. "The High Septon once told me that as we sin, so do we suffer. If that's true, Lord Eddard, tell me … why is it always the innocents who suffer most, when you high lords play your game of thrones? Ponder it, if you would, while you wait upon the queen. And spare a thought for this as well: The next visitor who calls on you could bring you bread and cheese and the milk of the poppy for your pain … or he could bring you Sansa's head. - AGOT - EDDARD XV
Varys shows apparent disgust at the murders of Rhaegar's children, Rhaenys and Aegon, at the end of Robert's Rebellion, and the way in which they were brutally murdered.
However, we later learn in the series that Aegon seemingly survived and was swapped with a tanner's child, bought by Varys and swapped with Aegon, so that this bought child could be sacrificed to the Lannisters, who Varys presumed would want to kill Rhaegar's children;
"A true friend, our Lord Connington. He must be, to remain so fiercely loyal to the grandson of the king who took his lands and titles and sent him into exile. A pity about that. Elsewise Prince Rhaegar's friend might have been on hand when my father sacked King's Landing, to save Prince Rhaegar's precious little son from getting his royal brains dashed out against a wall." The lad flushed. "That was not me. I told you. That was some tanner's son from Pisswater Bend whose mother died birthing him. His father sold him to Lord Varys for a jug of Arbor gold. He had other sons but had never tasted Arbor gold. Varys gave the Pisswater boy to my lady mother and carried me away." "Aye." Tyrion moved his elephants. "And when the pisswater prince was safely dead, the eunuch smuggled you across the narrow sea to his fat friend the cheesemonger, who hid you on a poleboat and found an exile lord willing to call himself your father. It does make for a splendid story, and the singers will make much of your escape once you take the Iron Throne … assuming that our fair Daenerys takes you for her consort." - ADWD - TYRION VI
This entire "splendid story" as Tyrion calls it, is full of inconsistencies and unbelievable acts.
The first red flag of this story is the idea that Varys, a former slave child who abhors slavery, would willingly buy another man's young child. Also pay attention to the mention of 'Arbor gold', which has been well documented on this sub for years for how its always a signal of lies, as individuals like Littlefinger mention it in passing whenever they are telling a lie.
The second red flag is the idea that Varys, someone who seemingly abhors the murder and suffering of innocent children, would willingly sacrifice an innocent young child and allow them to be murdered just to spare another, more valuable child. The idea that Varys would also take Elia's child away from her, either willingly or unwillingly on her part, is also questionable.
The third red flag is why Varys chose only to switch Aegon with another child, and not do the same for Rhaenys. Having two imposter Targaryen children raised to believe they are Targaryens could've helped to support their claims, build them up as a rival power in Westeros and also provide a backup option for Varys incase fAegon didn't survive his childhood.
The final red flag is the idea that Varys was able to foresee how the Rebellion was going to end, accurately guessed that Rhaegar's children would be murdered by the Lannisters, knew where and when to find Elia and her children, be able to remove one of her children away from her without anyone knowing, and knew that one of Tywin's men would kill the children so brutally that next to no one would be able to recognise them - the idea story is built on a series of flimsy conveniences and incredible predictive abilities on Varys' part.
If Varys truly cared so much about the protection and well-being of children, he would not have willingly bought and sacrificed an innocent child to be sacrificed in exchange for Aegon's survival, nor would he have abandoned Rhaenys to her fate if he could have prevented it. This means either Varys truly doesn't give a damn about the wellbeing of children and just lies to the likes of Ned and Tyrion about it, or that the entire story about Aegon being swapped with a tanner's child is a lie like some fans believe, or that both stories are lies muddled together to make it more difficult to discern the truth.
Perhaps the truth of Varys' lies is best exposed in this often cited excerpt from ACOK, a conversation between him and Tyrion about the infamous "Shadow on the Wall" riddle;
Varys smiled. "Here, then. Power resides where men believe it resides. No more and no less.""So power is a mummer's trick?" "A shadow on the wall," Varys murmured, "yet shadows can kill. And ofttimes a very small man can cast a very large shadow." Tyrion smiled. "Lord Varys, I am growing strangely fond of you. I may kill you yet, but I think I'd feel sad about it." - ACOK - TYRION II
The question of who Varys refers to in this conversation has been debated for years on this sub. Some believe that Varys was alluding to fAegon, that if people believe he is the real Aegon then he will have power, even if he doesn't truly have power as a common non-Targaryen child. Others have suggested Varys was alluding to Littlefinger, who was once a young small man who rose very high in King's Landing and cast a large shadow over the realm by starting the WotFk through his schemes.
I however believe that Varys is talking about himself.
Varys was once a very small man when he came to King's Landing at Aerys' calling for him to join the Small Council. He was seen as a young ex-slave, without a lordship or house of his own, weak and powerless. But overtime, through his manipulation of Aerys, encouraging his paranoia and own self-inflicted downfall, Varys cast a very large shadow over the empire of House Targaryen in Westeros, and destroyed it forever. What Varys says here to Tyrion is a very veiled threat that he can be dangerous to Tyrion if he underestimates Varys.
Tyrion however, in his arrogance, believes that Varys is referring to him, being a "very small man" and begins considering him a friend.
This is the third and final lie of Varys' character that I wish to dissect here - the lie that he is a friend or useful ally of sorts to Tyrion.
The idea of Varys betraying Tyrion's trust and working against him is first presented to us by Cersei, when she lets slip that Varys informed her of Tyrion's plan to send the Hound into battle at the Battle of the Blackwater;
"Varys says so." The swan was too rich for his taste. A line appeared on Cersei's pale white brow, between those lovely eyes. "You put too much trust in that eunuch." "He serves me well." "Or so he'd have you believe. You think you're the only one he whispers secrets to? He gives each of us just enough to convince us that we'd be helpless without him. He played the same game with me, when I first wed Robert. For years, I was convinced I had no truer friend at court, but now . . ." She studied his face for a moment. "He says you mean to take the Hound from Joffrey." - ACOK - TYRION XII
On a first read, we are quick to dismiss Cersei's claims for how much she is built up as an antagonistic and untrustworthy character, but in later understanding her motives in her own POV chapters, we realise there may be an inkling of truth in her claims. In the case of the Hound, Varys has no reason to inform her of Tyrion's plan, however innocent and insignificant in the grand game of thrones they may be, other than to maintain some level of trust with her and to invoke conflict between the Lannister siblings, which benefits Varys.
There are frequent moments throughout the series in which Varys alludes to knowing key information and deliberately withholding it from Tyrion even if it may benefit Tyrion, including who ordered Mandon Moore to kill Tyrion;
Bronn had turned up all he could on Ser Mandon, but no doubt Varys knew a deal more . . . should he choose to share it. "The man seems to have been quite friendless," Tyrion said carefully. "Sadly," said Varys, "oh, sadly. You might find some kin if you turned over enough stones back in the Vale, but here . . . Lord Arryn brought him to King's Landing and Robert gave him his white cloak, but neither loved him much, I fear. Nor was he the sort the smallfolk cheer in tourneys, despite his undoubted prowess. Why, even his brothers of the Kingsguard never warmed to him. Ser Barristan was once heard to say that the man had no friend but his sword and no life but duty . . . but you know, I do not think Selmy meant it altogether as praise. Which is queer when you consider it, is it not? Those are the very qualities we seek in our Kingsguard, it could be said—men who live not for themselves, but for their king. By those lights, our brave Ser Mandon was the perfect white knight. And he died as a knight of the Kingsguard ought, with sword in hand, defending one of the king's own blood." The eunuch gave him a slimy smile and watched him sharply. Trying to murder one of the king's own blood, you mean. Tyrion wondered if Varys knew rather more than he was saying. - ASOS - TYRION II
When Tyrion presses Varys for information about Mandon, Varys deliberately skims over Mandon's life and offers vague beliefs about the perfect Kingsguard to try and derail Tyrion's line of questioning, and when Varys pretends not to have known about Mandon trying to kill Tyrion, he watches Tyrion "sharply" to try and gather how much Tyrion himself knows, whether or not Tyrion will seek retribution for it from the anger on his face, and almost openly mocks him for the smile he gives. Tyrion briefly considers the idea that Varys is deliberately holding information back from him, but chooses instead to talk about other matters, which is what Varys wanted.
On the matter of Varys' choosing to support the Lannisters or Stannis, Varys once again tries to confuse Tyrion with riddles and not directly answer the question;
"He accuses my brother and sister of incest. I wonder how he came by that suspicion." "Perhaps he read a book and looked at the color of a bastard's hair, as Ned Stark did, and Jon Arryn before him. Or perhaps someone whispered it in his ear." The eunuch's laugh was not his usual giggle, but deeper and more throaty. "Someone like you, perchance?" "Am I suspected? It was not me." "If it had been, would you admit it?" "No. But why should I betray a secret I have kept so long? It is one thing to deceive a king, and quite another to hide from the cricket in the rushes and the little bird in the chimney. Besides, the bastards were there for all to see." - ACOK - TYRION III
We know for certain that Varys didn't want the WotFK to start so soon or for the truth of Cersei's children to come out in AGOT because he wanted more time for Viserys' forces to grow in strength and come closer to Westeros in order to invade, either to take the throne for themselves or be the ones to kill the beloved Robert Baratheon and paint themselves as villainous usurpers to make fAegon more heroic and not taint him with Robert's blood on his hands.
However, like with Cersei and Tyrion, Varys needs to tell those on the Small Council a certain amount of secretive information in order to gain their trust and support, including Stannis. That Varys even chooses to give a deeper and more unsettling laugh about the matter is another example of him openly laughing about his treachery in Tyrion's face and Tyrion not realising it.
When Tyrion almost stumbles upon this ruse and Varys realises that his laugh was too deep and questionable, Varys tries to brush it off by saying its harder to keep a secret secret if so many people are investigating it, and insists that there were so many of Robert's bastards to find for Stannis to figure out the truth on his own. But again, this last statement from Varys is littered with half-truths.
Varys insists it is hard to keep deceiving King Robert about the truth of his children's true parentage, and even harder to keep deceiving the truth from those who are deliberately looking for the truth and wanting to find it. This in itself is a reference to his believe that Stannis was always power-hungry for the Iron Throne, and was just looking for an excuse to try to claim it for himself as Robert's true heir, regardless of whether or not Cersei's children were Robert's or not.
But his own comment about "betraying a secret I have held for so long" is a direct allusion to fAegon's existence, and his determination not to reveal the truth of his existence to anyone, including Tyrion.
Even when Tyrion rides with Illyrio and Jon Connington's entourage in ADWD, Tyrion is only led to believe that they are going to support Daenerys' claim for the Iron Throne, and has to work out for himself that fAegon is actually Aegon and the one Varys and Illyrio wish to crown;
Young Griff hesitated. "Lannister? Your father—" "—is dead. At my hand. If it please Your Grace to call me Yollo or Hugor, so be it, but know that I was born Tyrion of House Lannister, trueborn son of Tywin and Joanna, both of whom I slew. Men will tell you that I am a kingslayer, a kinslayer, and a liar, and all of that is true … but then, we are a company of liars, are we not? Take your feigned father. Griff, is it?" The dwarf sniggered. "You should thank the gods that Varys the Spider is a part of this plot of yours. Griff would not have fooled the cockless wonder for an instant, no more than it did me. No lord, my lordship says, no knight. And I'm no dwarf. Just saying a thing does not make it true. Who better to raise Prince Rhaegar's infant son than Prince Rhaegar's dear friend Jon Connington, once Lord of Griffin's Roost and Hand of the King?" "Be quiet." Griff's voice was uneasy. - ADWD - TYRION V
After Tyrion works out the truth and manipulates both fAegon and Jon Connington into riding for Westeros instead of joining forces with Daenerys, he disappears and goes off to seek her out.
This likely angers Varys, and is the reason why Varys no longer affectionately calls Tyrion by his name or by '"lord" and instead refers to him as "the imp" in ADWD's epilogue, a term that Varys knows Tyrion hates;
Ser Kevan tried to rise, but the strength had left him. He could not feel his legs. "I thought the crossbow fitting. You shared so much with Lord Tywin, why not that? Your niece will think the Tyrells had you murdered, mayhaps with the connivance of the Imp. The Tyrells will suspect her. Someone somewhere will find a way to blame the Dornishmen. Doubt, division, and mistrust will eat the very ground beneath your boy king, whilst Aegon raises his banner above Storm's End and the lords of the realm gather round him." "Aegon?" For a moment he did not understand. Then he remembered. A babe swaddled in a crimson cloak, the cloth stained with his blood and brains. "Dead. He's dead." - ADWD - EPILOGUE
Varys chooses to frame Tyrion for Kevan's murder, **deliberately and intentionally further putting his life in danger by Cersei's wrath, already knowing that Tyrion has a large bounty on his head because of her, and talks lowly of Tyrion by calling him an "Imp" and referring to his "connivance" in a very scorned tone.
Varys never considered Tyrion a friend or ally in ASOIAF and was just using him, another lie that he tells throughout the series, and by the end of ADWD, he hates Tyrion for his scheming and knowing too much information than Varys wished him to know.
But there is a bigger telling point about how much Varys uses Tyrion, and a more ground-breaking twist in the narrative that reflects both how much Varys underestimates Tyrion and how much Varys never cared for him;
In ASOS, Varys didn't tell Tyrion how to reach the Tower of the Hand to go and kill Tywin. Varys told him this key information so that Tyrion could go and kill Shae instead, who Varys considered a greater threat to him.
Shae is one of the few, perhaps the only, people in ASOIAF to see through Varys' disguises;
A whiff of something rank made him turn his head. Shae stood in the door behind him, dressed in the silvery robe he'd given her. I loved a maid as white as winter, with moonglow in her hair. Behind her stood one of the begging brothers, a portly man in filthy patched robes, his bare feet crusty with dirt, a bowl hung about his neck on a leather thong where a septon would have worn a crystal. The smell of him would have gagged a rat. "Lord Varys has come to see you," Shae announced. The begging brother blinked at her, astonished. Tyrion laughed. "To be sure. How is it you knew him when I did not?" She shrugged. "It's still him. Only dressed different." - ACOK - TYRION X
This catches Varys off guard, and any chance of seeing him being angry or looking threatened is waved away from the reader when Tyrion laughs it off and turns his attention again to his paramour Shae.
Wearing disguises is a very important part of Varys' many schemes, including visiting Ned Stark in the Black Cells as the gaoler Rugen;
"Wine," a voice answered. It was not the rat-faced man; this gaoler was stouter, shorter, though he wore the same leather half cape and spiked steel cap. "Drink, Lord Eddard." He thrust a wineskin into Ned's hands. The voice was strangely familiar, yet it took Ned Stark a moment to place it. "Varys?" he said groggily when it came. He touched the man's face. "I'm not … not dreaming this. You're here." The eunuch's plump cheeks were covered with a dark stubble of beard. Ned felt the coarse hair with his fingers. Varys had transformed himself into a grizzled turnkey, reeking of sweat and sour wine. "How did you … what sort of magician are you?" - AGOT - EDDARD XV
His disguise as Rugen is very important to Varys' plans after Tyrion's disappearance from King's Landing, as Varys seeks to frame Rugen as a Tyrell puppet who broke Tyrion from imprisonment on the Tyrells' behalf, to sow division and further paranoia between Cersei and the Tyrells;
Gold, yes, but the moment Cersei took it she could tell that it was wrong. Too small, she thought, too thin. The coin was old and worn. On one side was a king's face in profile, on the other side the imprint of a hand. "This is no dragon," she said. "No," Qyburn agreed. "It dates from before the Conquest, Your Grace. The king is Garth the Twelfth, and the hand is the sigil of House Gardener." Of Highgarden. Cersei closed her hand around the coin. What treachery is this? Mace Tyrell had been one of Tyrion's judges, and had called loudly for his death. Was that some ploy? Could he have been plotting with the Imp all the while, conspiring at Father's death? With Tywin Lannister in his grave, Lord Tyrell was an obvious choice to be King's Hand, but even so . . . "You will not speak of this with anyone," she commanded. - AFFC - CERSEI II
But this ploy to incite conflict between the Lannisters and Tyrells would have failed if Shae had lived, as she had seen through Varys' disguises and could've warned Cersei of it, something which Varys could not allow, especially given that he considered her one of Cersei's pawns after Tyrion's trial.
It is also fundamentally not in Varys' interest for Tyrion to kill Tywin, as keeping Tywin alive for now would ensure the Dornish would have someone to rise up and seek vengeance against for Elia's murder. As readers are shown in AFFC and ADWD Dornish chapters, the Martells are divided and frankly confused about how to seek vengeance for Elia's murder now that Tywin, Gregor and Armory Lorch - the three men involved in her murder - are now dead. **If Tywin had lived, Varys could've played on the Dornish thirst for vengeance against him and had fAegon promise them it in exchange for their support, something which they likely would've agreed to.
So by this point in the post, we've explored some of the key lies of Varys' character to know for sure what he is not;
So who is the real Varys? Behind all of these lies and deceptions, who is he really deep down?
Well, Varys is not a eunuch, and in fact fAegon's true father by blood. Varys has deliberately spent his life lying about being a eunuch in order to discourage people from the truth that he is the father of fAegon by Illyrio’s sister, and wants to control the Iron Throne through fAegon.
Recall Varys' conversation with Tyrion in ACOK that I previously cited earlier;
"He accuses my brother and sister of incest. I wonder how he came by that suspicion." "Perhaps he read a book and looked at the color of a bastard's hair, as Ned Stark did, and Jon Arryn before him. Or perhaps someone whispered it in his ear." The eunuch's laugh was not his usual giggle, but deeper and more throaty. "Someone like you, perchance?" "Am I suspected? It was not me." "If it had been, would you admit it?" "No. But why should I betray a secret I have kept so long? It is one thing to deceive a king, and quite another to hide from the cricket in the rushes and the little bird in the chimney. Besides, the bastards were there for all to see." - ACOK - TYRION III
"Why should I betray a secret I have kept so long?" is the biggest hint towards fAegon's existence and Varys' own true motivations in the entire series. Varys makes this spur of the moment claim after being caught off guard by Tyrion and doesn't think it through before saying it and letting Tyrion realise there is more to him.
Varys was never castrated and he is not bald. He deliberately shaves his head to hide his true parentage and lies about being a eunuch to discourage people from believing that he is capable of fathering a child, a child with Blackfyre blood that he wishes to sit on the Iron Throne, a secret that Varys has cared for and kept so long.
The last time we see Varys in ADWD, he finally begins to tell the truth about fAegon's existence, and when he does, and speaks about the son he loves, he begins to speak in his real, deeper and non-emasculated voice;**
"Aegon?" For a moment he did not understand. Then he remembered. A babe swaddled in a crimson cloak, the cloth stained with his blood and brains. "Dead. He's dead." "No." The eunuch's voice seemed deeper. "He is here. Aegon has been shaped for rule since before he could walk. He has been trained in arms, as befits a knight to be, but that was not the end of his education. He reads and writes, he speaks several tongues, he has studied history and law and poetry. A septa has instructed him in the mysteries of the Faith since he was old enough to understand them. He has lived with fisherfolk, worked with his hands, swum in rivers and mended nets and learned to wash his own clothes at need. He can fish and cook and bind up a wound, he knows what it is like to be hungry, to be hunted, to be afraid. Tommen has been taught that kingship is his right. Aegon knows that kingship is his duty, that a king must put his people first, and live and rule for them." - ADWD - EPILOGUE
This is who Varys truly is - not a eunuch, not a victim of slavery or castration, not a man who weeps for the suffering of children, not a friend of Tyrion Lannister, but a loving father who wishes to cast a very large shadow over the greatest empire the world of ASOIAF has ever known.
Varys is not a eunuch but instead the father of fAegon, a secret he has spent his life protecting, and a lie he has spent his life telling to better protect his son.
Varys does not hate R'hllor or those who worship magical flames, his entire story about his manhood being sacrificed to flames is a lie he tells to gain Tyrion's trust in their efforts to defeat Stannis in ACOK. Varys is close friends with Illyrio, a man who praises R'hllor, and spent the early parts of his life encouraging Aerys to feed innocent people to the flames of wildfire.
Varys does not hate the suffering of innocent children, he was prepared to buy an innocent child from a man and sacrifice him in order to protect the "real" Aegon, he was prepared to abandon Rhaenys to her brutal death even if he could have saved her too and prepared to send Viserys and Daenerys into a doomed invasion of Westeros that would've led to their deaths just to make fAegon appear a more heroic saviour compared to them.
Varys was never a friend or ally to Tyrion but instead was using him ever since they first met. He has repeatedly withheld important information from him such as who hired Mandon Moore to kill Tyrion and how Stannis figured out the truth about Cersei's children, and on frequent occasions has nearly openly laughed in Tyrion's face at both his misfortune and the information Varys withheld from him. Varys also manipulated Tyrion into killing Shae so that she would not expose Varys' identity as Rugen and didn't trust Tyrion with the information about fAegon's existence, something that Tyrion had to figure out himself. Varys also talks lowly of Tyrion at the end of ADWD as a "conniving Imp" which reflects Varys' true feelings about Tyrion.
Varys has spent his life shaving his hair and lying about being a eunuch to discourage anyone from believing he could father fAegon and better protect him, so that fAegon could one day take the Iron Throne, and cast a very large shadow over the Targaryen Empire forever.
Thanks for reading, if you enjoyed this theory be sure to read some of my other theories below;
All the signs that Tywin directly gave the Mountain the order to badly mistreat Elia Martell
The Father Rhaegaer, the Son Jon and the Holy Ghost Ghost, religious symbolism
Mance Rayder is a servant of the Others
Leyton Hightower is the Lord of Light and Malora Maid is Quaithe
2022 archive of ASOIAF theories available at the bottom of this post
submitted by I-am-the-Peel to asoiaf [link] [comments]

2023.06.04 16:43 backwards_watch The 4k release is one of the most delightful things I've ever seen. You can pause at every frame and admire their work

The 4k release is one of the most delightful things I've ever seen. You can pause at every frame and admire their work submitted by backwards_watch to Coraline [link] [comments]